


In Focus

by dreamertechie



Category: Big Bang (Band), GTOP (Band)
Genre: AU, Blow Jobs, Fluff, Hand Jobs, M/M, Riding, Romance, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-20
Updated: 2015-04-20
Packaged: 2018-03-25 00:48:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 33
Words: 77,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3790393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamertechie/pseuds/dreamertechie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shy photographer meets arrogant actor and two lives change forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

It was something in the air, that much he knew. As soon as he stepped out of the building he could tell there was something in the air that was different than any other city he’d been too. He closed his eyes and breathed in deep, soaking in the unknown essence.

“I really am back now, aren’t I?” he said to himself.

He looked down the street and saw a taxi coming his way. He adjusted his bag strap and grabbed the handle on his luggage as he hailed the cab. The car pulled over, the driver got out and opened the trunk. The driver put the luggage in his trunk and motioned for his new customer to hand him the bag from his shoulder. He looked at what the driver was motioning too and said, “Oh. No this stays with me.” He patted the bag. “Never leaves my side.” The driver looked puzzled for a second, nodded and motioned for him to get in the car as he walked back to the driver’s side.

When they were both in, the driver turned to man and asked,

“Where to, sir?”

“Oh right.” He said as he pulled out a slip of paper from his bag, handing it to the driver. The driver entered the address into his GPS and handed it back to him.

“Thank you, Mister…”

“Jiyong.”

“Thank you Mr. Jiyong. Now if you just buckle up we’ll be on our way.”

Jiyong pulled the belt across his body and sank back into the seat as the car started to pull away from the airport.

“I take it you’re not from here with your accent, right?” The driver looked at his passenger through the rearview mirror. Jiyong gave him a little smile in reply.

“Are you here for business or pleasure?” he asked.

Jiyong rolled down the window and breathed the air into his lungs again and then said,

“A little of both.”

“Well then, let me be the first to welcome you to Korea Mr. Jiyong. I hope you enjoy your stay.”

Jiyong gazed out the window and watched the world zip by, wondering how much the city had changed in his 12 year absence. Then he opened his bag, grabbed his camera and started to capture his new life.

 

**Chapter 1**

_One Year Later_

 

A young woman trying to calm her crying son. _Click_

An older couple walking hand in hand. _Click_

A gentleman stopped jogging and fell into the grass exhausted. _Click_

It was a bright cool morning in November and Jiyong found that even after a year of being back, he still loved to people watch in the park. He’d always do it when he was in the U.S. as a means to escape from his family, but now it had just become habit.

Photographing the world around him always drew inspiration for his bigger photo shoots. No matter how big or extravagant the shoot may be, if you don’t have the basic human emotions, you can never portray the story properly. He found that by observing the most mundane acts of human nature, he could help his models depict the exact emotion he wanted for the picture.

Guess that’s why he was voted number one for the next generation of Hollywood’s professional photographers. He had made a huge career for himself but he was never truly happy in the United States. Probably because he always thought of himself as an outcast that never fit in anywhere.

 

_BRRR BRRR BRRR_

_I'm finally waking up, a twist in my story. It's time I open up, and let your love right through me._

_BRRR BRRR BRRR_

 

Jiyong growled to himself as he heard the ringing phone in his pocket. He juggled to put his camera over his shoulder and answered his phone.

“What do you want Seungri? You know not to call me on Saturday mornings when I’m out unless it’s –“

“It’s an emergency or a big offer, I know sir,” replied the young man on the other end.

“Well… Which is it?”

“A little of both. Remember that shoot we did last month for Vogue? Well Nylon just called and they want you to their spread for this month. They liked your vibe from the Vogue shoot and they’ve redone their whole concept to work around you. The only thing is, is that their model has a very tight schedule and she can only do it on Monday. So should I go ahead and accept the offer sir?”

Jiyong looked around the park, wishing he could stay and escape reality for just a little longer, but then sighed and said,

“Fine. Yes go ahead. Now tell me about this concept they have.”

“Ok great. Well you see…”

Jiyong listened to his assistant describe the look the magazine wanted as he started walking back toward downtown.

 

Jiyong walked down the street, on his way to his favorite coffee shop, when he finished his call with Seungri. As he opened the door he was greeted with the familiar sound of the door chime ringing. He found his way to the small booth in the corner of the shop that had been dubbed “his lair” by the employees, and started unpacking his camera and computer. A girl walked up behind him and asked, “Do you want your white mocha with an extra shot as usual Jiyong?”

“Oh God,” he said as he jumped about a foot in the air. “I didn’t know you were behind me Soran!” He paused so his heart beat could go back to normal and then turned to the girl saying, “But make it with 2 extra shots today.”

“Yeah? You got a long day ahead of you?”

“Kinda. Apparently my model today is supposed to be a very high maintenance actor. We only have a couple hours to get the shoot done and I only got 4 hours of sleep last night. So it should be an interesting shoot.”

“Sounds fun,” she said sarcastically. “Well sir, I won’t keep you waiting. I’ll have it right out for you.” She smiled and walked off leaving him to his work.

That’s why he liked it here. They knew he was a pretty famous photographer that works with well known people, but they never pushed to know details. Everyone just treated him like a normal customer and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Soran came back with his drink, set it down on the table and left him to his work.

He went through the photo’s he had just captured from this morning’s outing and saw a picture he forgot he had taken. It was of a little boy sitting under a tree reading a book. Jiyong sat a stared at the boy and remembered his life growing up.

His father was an American med student when he’d met Jiyong’s mother, a Korean foreign exchange art student. Even though their personalities were completely opposite, they fell in love and got married. When Jiyong was 8 years old his parents moved from New York to Suwon because of his father’s work.

When he was growing up his parents thought it best to have a bilingual household, so when they did move, Jiyong would not have a language barrier problem. However, Jiyong was a shy, quiet, child, and when they moved to Korea, he became even more reserved. His mother would encourage him to draw or paint as a means to express himself, but they accepted that his quiet nature was just his way of dealing with the lifestyle change.

In his elementary school he didn’t make any friends. The kids thought he was weird because he would sit and draw, and wouldn’t talk to anyone. They would make fun of his pronunciation and the fact that he was from a different county. So he thought it best to just say nothing at all and do his school work.

Jiyong took a sip of his drink and looked at the boy in the photo again. He leaned back in his seat and started to remember a day he would never forget.

_It was the last day of the first week when he met him. School had finished for the day and Ji Yong was walking to the park that was across from the school with his sketch pad. He had made it across the street, and found a nice shaded area underneath a large tree to settle down in. As he was going through his bag to grab his pencils some other kids saw him. They came over and started to harass him, making fun of his drawings, laughing at the way he talked. Then out of nowhere another kid came up behind them and pushed the bullies to the ground. This new kid was a tall chubby boy who Jiyong had never seen before, but apparently the bullies had. For when they looked up to see who their attacker was, their eyes bugged out and they scrambled up and took off._

_The large boy picked up Jiyong's ripped drawing, dusted it off, and handed it back to him saying,_

_“Hope they didn’t ruin it too much.”_

_Jiyong just stared at the boy wide eyed._

_“Hel-looo…” the boy waved the drawing in Jiyong's face, wanting him to take it._

_Jiyong blushed and took the drawing from him._

_“You’re welcome, by the way,” said the boy. “Those two are jerks. If they ever bother you again just let me know.”_

_Jiyong looked down at the ground, not saying anything._

_“Hey kid. I’m just tryin to help you. So just find me next time, okay?”_

_Jiyong nodded slightly without lifting his head up to much._

_The boy chuckled and leaned down to ruffle Jiyong’s hair. Jiyong scrunched down at the contact and then looked up at him._

_The boy smiled at Jiyong, held out his hand, and said,_

_“The name’s Seunghyun. What’s your’s?_

 

All of a sudden Jiyong was snapped out of his daydream by a loud, irked, voice coming from the register.


	2. Chapter 2

_All of a sudden Jiyong was snapped out of his daydream by a loud, irked, voice coming from the register._

“I said I wanted NO foam on my latte.”

Jiyong looked over and saw that the voice was coming from a tall man who wore a hat and sunglasses, and kept looking at his watch. The barista held her head down ashamed and said, “Sorry Sir, I’ll remake it right away.”

He looked at his watch again and replied, “Make it quick. I have an important meeting.”

As the barista jumped in to action remaking the drink, the man snapped “And make it at 140 degrees. I don’t want to burn myself.”

Jiyong looked at the clock right above her and realized he too had somewhere to be, the photo shoot. He closed his laptop, threw it into his bag and gathered up the rest of his belongings.

The barista had finished making the man’s drink and handed it to him. He grabbed his drink and started walking toward the door.

Jiyong was in the process of putting his bag strap over his head when he ran into a hard surface. He had run right into the aggravated customer, who proceeded to yell,

“What the hell is your problem man?”

Jiyong didn’t want to aggravate him further so he shyly apologized and stepped to the side to let him pass. He heard the man whisper under his breath, “Damn, what is with people these days.”

Jiyong looked backed at the barista, mouthed “Sorry” and waved goodbye as he followed the man out.

It seemed that Jiyong could not escape him. As soon as he was out of the door he saw that the man was walking the same direction he was headed in, yelling at someone on the phone.

“I swear, people in this part of town are so incompetent.” He took a sip of his drink and continued, “Ugh, this is one of the worst things I’ve had. Write down never to go to…” He looked at the label on the cup. “ _Something More Café._ They can’t even make a freaking latte right. Anyways, where were we? Oh right. Where is this place again?”

Jiyong listened to the man ramble on and shook his head. He just didn’t understand how people could be so rude. He was the kind of person who believed that one should enjoy life and always be kind to others, it’s always best to have friends than enemies.

As they both continued walking, the man started to glance back at Jiyong.

He was too preoccupied with his own thoughts to hear the man say to the person on the other end “Hold up.” He turned around and barked “Are you following me?”

Jiyong did the typical thing where he looked around and then pointed to himself asking the man, “Are you talking to me?”

“No dumbass, I’m talking to your imaginary friend right next to you. Of course I’m talking to you. Are you following me?

Jiyong was a little flustered so he stuttered his reply, “Umm… I… I’m… My…”

“Well spit it out. Are you a fan or something? Do you want an autograph?”

Jiyong took a good look at the man and understood why he had asked such a thing. He was decked out in designer everything. From his jacket to his shoes, even his hat was designer. And he knew because he did the shoot for the company 2 months ago.

He could tell that the man had money, and lots of it. He guessed he was either a singer or actor, and an arrogant one at that.

The man cleared his throat loudly waiting for an answer.

Jiyong finally replied, “Umm… My place is just up the street.”

The man looked a little taken aback, probably expecting him to say he wanted a picture or something. But instead he stepped to the side saying, “Whatever, just go on ahead. I hate having people follow me.”

He quickly walked passed him, wanting to be away from this guy as soon as possible and continued on his way to the studio. He looked back for a second and saw the man had stopped in the middle of the sidewalk talking on his phone again. He was turning the corner when he barely heard the man say, “Just pick me up. I don’t want to walk anymore. I think people are starting to recognize me.”

 

When Jiyong reached his studio, he saw that all of his assistants were just finishing setting up for the shoot. Seungri saw that he had walked in and rushed over to him. He started to ramble on about the final details and a little about the actor for the shoot.

“His name is Vick and he’s currently the hottest thing in the Asian Film Industry. He likes to work fast and get shoots done as quickly as possible. I called Yun Joo over at W Magazine, who did his last shoot, and apparently he flipped out on one of the makeup assistants because she was ‘dabbing on the foundation too hard’. So I’ve given our girls a heads up. Is there anything else that you need sir?”

Jiyong looked around the room and saw that everything was ready, so he responded, “Nope. It looks great. I guess we just need to wait for him to show.”

As he said his final words he heard the door to the studio open and looked over.

“Oh you have got to be kidding me,” he whispered to himself as he saw a familiar hat atop a very familiar figure.


	3. Chapter 3

_As he said his final words he heard the door to the studio open and looked over._

_“Oh you have got to be kidding me,” he whispered to himself as he saw a familiar hat atop a very familiar figure._

 

Seungri looked to his boss for a quick second and asked in a low voice, “You know him?”

“No, not really. He was just a jerk I ran into on my way over here,” Jiyong groaned. “Completely rude. Called me a dumbass because he thought I was some fan following him, but whatever.”

“Oh, well I guess what everyone says is true then,” Seungri whispered. “We better get the show on the road,” he said as he walked over to Vick and his manager to greet them with Jiyong slowly following him.

Vick took off his shades as he looked around the studio. It was a smaller studio than he was used to being in and there were hardly any staff on set. His manager had told him when they pulled up that even though this was a small scale shoot, the photographer is supposed to be the best in the business. His manager explained that he’s from America and has done spreads for Rolling Stone, Cosmo, Men’s Health, and Elle. He has a very good reputation. People say that he’s demanding when he’s in the studio and always brings out the exact emotion the employer wants.

So naturally Vick pictured some middle aged white man and thought that this shoot would be trouble because of the possibility of a language problem. However, things are never what he imagines.

Seungri walked up to them and said, “Welcome to G.Kwon studios. My name is Seungri and this is Mr. Jiyong, owner and photographer of G.Kwon studios.” He bowed and stepped aside so Jiyong could greet them.

Jiyong warily moved closer to Vick hoping that the actor would not recognize him from their incident 15 minutes before. But as soon as Vick looked at him, his eyebrows furrowed.

“Wait a minute. You’re the guy from the coffee shop. The one that followed me,” he said

“I didn’t follow you. If you remember, I said that my place was up the street. And well as you see, here is my place. Now if you don’t mind I hear we are on a tight schedule, so let’s get you into hair and makeup, and get started.” Jiyong abruptly turned around and called for his assistants. They came scurrying over, greeted everyone, and looked to him for instructions.

“Please show him the way and get started on the concept we talked about Thursday.”

They nodded and motioned for Vick to follow them. Vick stared at Jiyong because a) this person was not what he expected and b) he never really had anyone order him around like this before. He looked to his manager with a ‘are you going to let him talk to me like this’ face, but he just rolled his eyes and pushed Vick toward the makeup artists and said, “Just go. And let’s not have a repeat like W, okay?”

Vick glared at him started walking towards the back of the studio when he heard Jiyong yell, “And don’t forget about that makeup change I mentioned yesterday.”

As he was walking, he looked back to where the man was standing and watched him turn to talk with everyone in the studio, “Okay people, we have the actor on set, so now we have to kick into gear and finish up the lighting and add final touches to the staging.” Jiyong pointed to one of the assistants and started to say something but before Vick could hear, he had already gone into the makeup room.

 

While he was in make up his mind was preoccupied with thoughts of Jiyong. He didn’t understand how the timid guy he thought was some weird fan, turned out to be a demanding professional photographer. This photographer was supposed to be American and the best in the business, but how can he when he speaks perfect Korean and looks like he’s 20? Things weren’t adding up.

He opened his mouth, about to speak, when the girl doing his hair stopped and became stiff saying, “Did I pull your hair to much sir? I am so sorry. I’ll try and be more careful sir. How’s this? Is this better?” She rambled on as she gently brushed his hair back.

He smirked to himself because the girl probably thought he was going to yell, but he wasn’t even paying attention to what she was doing really. So he proceeded to say, “No, you’re fine. I was just curious about something. I was told that the photographer was American, but obviously he’s not. And his accent sounds like he’s a native Korean, how long has he been here?”  

The girl relaxed and resumed doing up his hair and said, “Oh, Mr. Jiyong has been back for a little over a year now. He lived in the U.S. for I think… 10 years… no 12 years. But he lived in Korea before that. I don’t know much else."

“Uh huh…” he whispered and nodded his head slightly as not to disrupt her work.

“And how old is he?”

He saw the girl cock her head to the side in the mirror, contemplating. Then she said, “I think he just turned 25. Yeah that sounds right.”

Vicks eyes bugged out a little at this new found knowledge. Jiyong was only a year younger than him, and he already has an amazing reputation in the industry.

He then got the idea that if he didn’t have one of his notorious “incidents” today, he might be able to get on the good side of Jiyong. And being friends with him might just help him land a couple more roles, who knows?

The girl had stopped fixing his hair and was doing some last looks in the mirror when the costume manger came in and took him next door to change. After they tweaked a couple outfits he heard a soft knock on the changing room door. The door opened and his manager asked, “Are you done? Jiyong wants him out there, and we only have 4 hours until we need to be at the airport.”

She smiled and replied, “Yep. He’s all yours.”

“Thanks”

Vick smoothed down the ends of his jacket and was walking passed his manager when he stopped him to talk for a second. His manager rubbed his hands over his face and then looked at Vick and said, “Listen, I know you’ve had kind of a rough morning and all, but can you please behave today. I’m tired of trying to explain your actions whenever you do something. We have a small amount of time so let’s just get this done and be on our way to Japan, okay?”

Vick sighed, clapped his hand onto his managers’ shoulder and said, “Daesung, I’m sorry I’ve caused trouble. Really I am. But you’ve known me for years now, and you know that I’m just a very particular person.” He ended his sentence with a mischievous smile. Daesung glared at Vick and sarcastically said, “Oh I know… Oh how I know. But all joking aside, let’s just get through one thing without any hiccups, yeah?”

“Yeah,” replied Vick as they both made their way to front of the studio.

 

When he walked onto the set for the shoot he saw Jiyong laughing with some of his assistants. He noticed how bright and vibrant the man’s face lit up when he genuinely smiled, but as soon as Jiyong noticed him walking up, his face dropped.

The two stared at each other for a minute until Jiyong broke the silence by asking, “You didn’t give any of my girls trouble did you?”

Vick pointed at himself and said, “Who me?” mocking Jiyong from their first encounter. Before Jiyong could retort, Vick continued, “I was a perfect gentleman.”

Jiyong scoffed at him slightly and said, “Whatever, at least you’re off to a good start. I won’t tolerate any diva’s on my set, so just do as I say and we might get out of here sooner than we planned, okay?

“As you wish sir,” Vick answered accompanied with a mock salute.

Jiyong ignored him, turned to everyone else and said, “Makeup and hair on standby, Seungri at the monitor.” He looked to make sure the mentioned we in their places, they nodded that they were ready.

“Okay, guys here we go.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

The concept the magazine had in mind was centered around the five stages of grief. They wanted to know more about the story of “Vick”. Everyone knew who Vick was as soon as he appeared on a screen, but no one really knew who he was away from the camera. After weeks of talking with his agency and the magazine, Vick finally made the decision that it would be for the best if he did this interview and shoot.

Ever since he was little, Vick had always been a private person and now even more so, since he entered the public eye. Daesung was the one who convinced him to take this opportunity. Solely for the fact that he could show his fans more sides of himself, other than the conceited actor he’s known to be.

He and Daesung sat down the night before to go over the whole concept and story for the shoot. The story is about a young man who had set up a small surprise party for his girlfriend, only to find out that she wasn’t coming because she wanted to end the relationship. The concept of the shoot is how the young man goes through the five stages of grief to deal with the breakup. The magazine wanted to show its readers the emotional side of Vick in the photo spread, and then discuss his secretive past and personality in the interview.

Despite how much Vick didn’t want to reveal those types of emotions, he thought best to suck it up and look at it as another acting role, which essentially it was. Challenging yourself was part of an actor’s life, and that’s just what he wanted to do, challenge himself.

 

And so this is what brought him here today.

Vick was dressed in a casual maroon fitted jacket, with a black vest, black tie, and a white long sleeve dress shirt underneath. He also wore fitted dark wash jeans with a black belt, and dark gray suede dress shoes.

He walked onto the main part of the set that had been made to look like a small loft apartment. The set lights were dimmed to give the effect that the lights were out in the apartment. But the main light source for the room was supposed to be dangling twinkle lights, to set a romantic atmosphere.

The room was decorated in a way that he had never seen before. Imagine the typical cheesy party necessities like streamers and balloons but add the sophistication a candle light dinner, and you had this set. He stood in awe for a moment just to soak every fine detail in. From the exposed faux brick that lined the walls down to the small Victorian design etched into the table in the center of the room. This was one of the most stunning sets he had ever been on.

Jiyong walked up behind him and said, “Beautiful isn’t it.”

Vick still lost in thought simply whispered, “Yes…” Then remembering where he was and turned around abruptly, almost colliding with Jiyong. He stepped back to distance himself and asked, “What first.”

Jiyong slightly smiled at the man, appreciating his eagerness to get down to business, making him question his original impression of Vick. He motioned toward the fake door in the right-hand corner of the room and began to direct Vick into different stances and angles. He finally got him standing the way he wanted and with the click of the shutter, the photo shoot had begun.

 

Jiyong always liked to shoot the pictures in the order the story was written, almost like watching a play. He thought this would be the best way for the model to progress through the emotions that the story required. With that in mind, he started off the story with the young man waiting anxiously for his girlfriend by the door. From there he progressed to the young man receiving “the call” from his girlfriend.

After those two scenes were out of the way the true concept began with stage one, Denial. Jiyong paused, asked for hair and makeup to do some touch ups and then continued the shoot. He wanted to change up the wardrobe a bit so he asked Vick to loosen his tie but do it in character. Vick nodded in acknowledgement as Jiyong brought the camera back up to his face and started clicking away.

After about an hour and a half passed, and numerous directions for Vick, they had only gotten through two of the five stages and Jiyong was getting frustrated. He tried using countless tactics to get the emotion he wanted, but he realized that only one way would work. Something he liked to call a "one’s session". He lowered his arms and turned to his assistant. As soon as the two locked eyes he knew that Seungri was thinking the same thing.

Everyone in the room looked at the two men, wondering what had caused the sudden pause in the shoot. Seungri ignored the stares and just talked to his boss knowing what he wanted to do next.

"Sir, are you sure you want to do this on such a tight schedule?"

"It’s because of the tight schedule. I think if we do a one’s session, we can work more efficiently,” Jiyong sighed.

 

Vick spoke up with a slightly agitated voice and said, "Um... excuse me, but what the hell is a one’s session and why do we need to do it. Is there something wrong with my acting?"

Jiyong turned to the man and tried to say explain his sudden stop.

“I'm just not getting the emotions I want. So sometimes I do a one’s session with the model. I ask everyone to leave the building so the model and I can have some one on one time. I rarely do it, but I think it needs to be done. You'll understand when we start." He turned back to everyone and announced that it was now a closed set. "Just go grab a bite to eat and come back in an hour and a half and we'll be done."

You could almost see the question marks popping up above everyone’s heads, as they looked at one another.

Jiyong could feel his extra shots of espresso starting to wear off from earlier and he was getting impatient. He raised his voice and said, “Leave. Now. This is a closed set, so I want everyone out in less than a minute, okay?”

At that, the entire studio was chaos for a few seconds as everyone scrambled to grab their bags and purses and run out the door. Vick sat on the couch and watched in awe at how fast everyone left.

Once the last person was out the door, Jiyong turned and walked over to Vick. He grabbed a chair on his way over and set it down right in from on him. For some reason Vick’s heart started to pound faster, whether it was from the mass chaos that just happened or the fact that he was now alone with Jiyong, he didn’t know. But him coming closer did not help his situation, so he sat there quietly awaiting an explanation.

Jiyong looked at Vick and could see he was very confused and that’s the last thing he wanted a model to be. So he began to explain how a one’s session worked.

“okay from here on out I’m going to ask you personal questions. Forget about this character you’ve created, I want ‘you’ as in Vick, in this situation. All I’m looking for are the emotions. I want you to think about them and how you felt in whatever situation you think of. I also want you to think out loud and explain to me what you are thinking of. You don't have to give me specifics, but if I hear something that I think will help you progress emotionally, I will ask you to explain further. Which means you might have to reveal some personal stuff but I promise we are the only ones here and nothing will ever leave this room.”

Vicks face fell at the thought of telling a stranger anything personal, but for some reason when he looked at Jiyong, he looked like someone who genuinely wanted to help him. He didn’t want him to know how uncomfortable he was with talking about the past, so he decided to reply with a typical smart ass comment.

“Yeah whatever, let’s just get this over with.” He scooted to the edge of the couch, leaned toward Jiyong and whispered, “But nothing will leave this room, got it?”


	5. Chapter 5

_He scooted to the edge of the couch, leaned toward Jiyong and whispered, “But nothing will leave this room, got it?”_

 

“Yes, now let’s get to work.” Jiyong said as he hopped up from his chair and grabbed his camera.

“I just want you to get comfortable with talking to me while I snap a couple photo’s, so let’s start with some of the basics.”

Vick sat on the couch, astounded at how quickly this man changed personalities. He went from shy guy on the street, to a demanding professional, to someone who seemed to care about him. It was kind of overwhelming but he decided to put it in the back of his mind and get on with the shoot. Getting up off the couch he looked over at Jiyong, who was standing underneath a light, changing settings on his camera. Vick stared at the shadows that played across the young man’s face. Taking his distraction, he used it as an opportunity to study his features.

Jiyong was slightly above average height. He had a solid build, not overly so, just defined. His hair was a light blonde color that stood up, away from his eyes. As he continued to stare at his face, he saw how concentrated Jiyong was, and he felt something at the edge of his mind. Like he had seen him make this face before, but how could he, he only just met him 2 hours ago.

There was just something about him that seemed familiar.

Jiyong finished setting his camera and turned to find Vick staring at him. He thought it was out of nervousness so he said, “It’s okay, relax. Let’s just start from the beginning.” He brought the camera up and started clicking.

Vick broke out of his thoughts and asked, “Where do you want me to stand?”

“Right there is fine, just doing some test shots.”

Vick stood still not knowing what to do as Jiyong took pictures and messed with his camera some more. Then Jiyong finally asked, “So, what’s your name?”

Vicks eyebrows furrowed when he heard the question and replied, “Um, you should know that? Why are you asking?”

“Just go with it,” Jiyong said as he moved to the left.

Still having no idea really what was going on he said, “okay… My name is Vick.”

“Surely that can’t be your real name, right? What’s your real name?”

“Only my family and a select few at my company know that.”

“And why is that?”

“Because I have problems with my family and I don’t want to be associated with them anymore. So my company agreed that I could use a stage name.”

Vick’s stance started to tense up, so Jiyong put that information into the back of his head as something to bring up later. He changed the subject and continued with,

“okay. What is your favorite color?”

Vick relaxed a little, glad that he didn’t push the name thing further and answered with a smile on his face, “Pink actually.”

Jiyong was happy to see Vick loosening up a bit and gave a little laugh at his response.

“Well that wasn’t the answer I was expecting. What did you do for fun in high school,” he asked as he moved to the right.

Vick smiled at the thought of high school. He was such a crazy and angst ridden teenager, as most are. He thought back to all the crazy stuff he did in high school and how it was around that time he got scouted as a model, which was really his first job.

When Jiyong noticed Vick smiling to himself, he started taking as many pictures as he could. Glad to be finally getting real emotions out of him. He could tell that Vick was starting to feel more comfortable, so he quickly asked a follow up question, “You were the popular kid in high school, weren’t you?”

Vick laughed at that.

Jiyong’s stomach did a little flip at the sound of his laugh. Unlike how their initial meeting had turned out, Vicks laughter was so soft and warm. He was beginning to think that Vicks real personality was something completely different than what he showed to people.

Vick cleared his throat and answered the question, “I was actually the quiet kid in high school.”

“You? Quiet?”

“Yeah, I know. But really, I was the guy who all the girls thought was hot just because I was ‘mysterious’. All the guys in the school hated me cause all the girls liked me, so there wasn’t much friendship going my way. But that was only the last year of high school. Before that…” He let the sentence run off and shook his head not really wanting to continue. He wanted to get away from that topic, so to switch things up he asked Jiyong a question, “What’s your story? Daesung told me you were from America, but when I saw you, you weren’t anything like I pictured.”

Jiyong was taken off guard for a minute and stopped shooting. Since Vick was opening up to him, he thought it would be best to talk about himself as well. He looked down changing a setting on his camera and said, “I was born in the states, but when I was around 8 I moved here for a couple years. Then some family stuff happened and I had to move back to the states when I was 12, almost 13.”

“What made you come back again?”

“I don’t know really. I mean I had job offers and shoots that I did when I first came back. But I think I just missed this place. I guess I was like you in high school too, I was the quiet kid with no friends. But when I was little I did have one friend, he lived here. Suwon, I think, that’s where I lived when I was in middle school.”

Both of them gazed at each other for a minute. Jiyong's stomach did a little flip again, so he fiddled with his camera, shying away from Vicks intense stare. He regained composure and got back to the photo shoot. He brought the camera back up to face and asked his next question, “So you said something about how high school was different from your last year there, how so?

Vick realized that this was probably where Jiyong would start to ask him more personal questions, so he sighed and reluctantly explained more about his past.

“Well, my first years of high school were hell at home. My parents divorced when I was in middle school and both of them remarried in those first 2 years.”

After he said that, Jiyong saw something in Vicks’ eyes he’d been looking for the entire shoot.

In mere seconds this grown man looked like he was a small little boy, and his heart started to ache. With this kind of reaction to this topic, Jiyong knew he had found what he needed to break Vick down emotionally. He snapped his camera multiple times, stopped to review the shots, and then looked at Vick saying,

“I think this photo shoot is going to turn out different than either of us imagined.”

 

Jiyong waited for Vick to say something, but he never did. He took the opportunity and continued with, “okay so now that you know how this one’s session works, and you seem more comfortable, I going to start asking you difficult questions. Please don’t hold back your emotions. Just let whatever you feel come out. Because I promise you, from what I’ve seen so far you have a lot of potential. All you have to do is let go.”

Vick stared at him. Studying him for the 2nd time that day, but this time he focused just on his face. He looked at the young man’s full lips, then onto his high cheekbones and how they drew his attention to his dark eyebrows.

Then he looked Jiyong in the eyes.

He felt that feeling again, like he should be remembering something, but he couldn’t. His heart started beating faster. His hands became clammy, his throat dry. But for some reason, something deep down was telling him that he could trust Jiyong.

He took a deep breath and said, “What do you want to know?”


	6. Chapter 6

_He took a deep breath and said, “What do you want to know?_ ”

Jiyong stepped closer to Vick and said, “Let’s talk about your parents’ divorce, is that okay?”

Vick looked up at him and then looked at the watch on his wrist saying, “I don’t really have a choice do I, since we only have an hour left.”

“Just be honest with you emotions and the time will pass quickly, I promise.” Jiyong said as he motioned Vick to sit at the table. He changed the lighting really fast and walked over to meet Vick.

“How did you parents first tell you they were getting a divorce?” He brought the camera up ready to start shooting.

Vick closed his eyes and thought back to when he was a little boy. He remembered how his father was always making him and his mother move from city to city because of his job. His parents were always fighting and screaming at each other whenever he came home from school. Except for one day in middle school when he walked into an eerily quiet house.

“I had just finished school that day. My parents were always at each other’s throats whenever I came home. But that day, I found them in the living room together, not saying a word to each other. My mom was sitting on the couch with tearful eyes looking at ground and my dad was standing behind the couch with his back turned to mom. As I walked into the room, I ran right for mom.” He heard the clicking of the shutter as he continued, “I sat next to her asking her what was the matter, but before she could respond, my dad turned around and said, ‘Son, we need to talk.’ It was then that they told me how things weren’t working out between them and they were separating.”

Jiyong listened to Vick as he described his memories and asked, “Can you remember how you felt? What was going through you head?”

“At first I felt numb. Like this wasn’t really happening, like a dream. No a nightmare.”

“okay, go on.” Jiyong was starting to take more pictures as Vick became lost in his memories.

“I remember how that week had started out really bad for some reason. And by the end of the week, this happened. I just couldn’t, wouldn’t believe it. How could my parents do this to me? They just couldn’t. It wasn’t right.”

Jiyong internally gave a sigh of relief and asked, “Now, what’s that feeling you are talking of? How you didn’t want to believe this was happening. Think about why I’m asking you this during _this_ particular photo shoot.”

Vick closed his eyes contemplating everything that had happened today and what they talked about. He thought about what he was telling Jiyong and about the concept of the shoot.

Then it clicked.

His eyes shot opened and found Jiyong's’ as he whispered, “Denial.”

From that moment on Vick understood everything.

They restated the main part of the photo shoot and continued going through every stage of grieving; Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance using Vicks’ past emotions.

 

Vick told most of his story up until his last year in high school. He explained to Jiyong how after his parents told him, he became an angry child. He shut down and would not talk to anyone even at school. After the divorce was finalized his father moved out, leaving him and his mother to fend for themselves. Then about a year later, his mother had found someone and they moved in with him. But he soon realized that his mother was too preoccupied with her new romance to give him any attention. When he couldn’t stand living in the house with his mother any longer, he told her he was going to live with his father. She tried to convince him otherwise but he said it he just wanted to get away.

He would never forget the last thing his mother said to him on the day he left for his fathers. As he was walking away, she said to him, “You’re just like him you know. Never telling me how you feel, never wanting to be around me. So of course I found someone new, he at least love me. You obviously don’t, because just like him, you’re leaving me. Abandoning me.”

He wanted to tell her how _he_ was the one who felt abandoned. How _he_ felt like _she_ didn’t want to be around him. But she had already walked back into the house.

He lived with his father who had remarried someone by the time he entered high school. He didn’t tell his dad the real reason for leaving his mom. He told him that he thought it would be for the best if he lived in the city during high school so he could be used to it by college. His father didn’t care what Vick did as long as he didn’t make trouble, he was free to live his own life.  

Throughout middle school and high school he was always on the heavyset side, but after going through the divorce, battling depression, and having hormones finally kick in, he lost a lot of his weight. He started to fuel his anger into something healthy and took up exercising. By his last year in high school he became fit, well defined and essentially better looking.

And that’s the year a modeling scout contacted him taking him away from the family who forgot about him.

 

They progressed through the photo shoot without a problem. Vick let himself breakdown emotionally and Jiyong was there to capture every moment. When he took the last picture he looked at Vicks tearstained face. Jiyong had always be very susceptible whenever he saw other people's pained expressions, and Vicks was no exception.

He walked over to Vick who was sitting on the couch. He set down his camera on the coffee table and kneeled down on one knee in front of the distraught man. Vick had brought his head down, his face in his hands, trying to cover himself from Jiyong. Jiyong placed one hand on Vicks' knee and said in a soft whisper, “We’re done now.”

All Vick could do was nod in response because he didn’t trust his voice enough to speak.

Jiyong squeezed the man’s knee and said, “Thank you for trusting me. Really, I understand how hard this must be. So thank you.” He pushed himself up off the floor and started to walk away when a hand reached out and grabbed his.

He looked down and saw that the man’s face was still facing the ground. He barely heard him mumble, “Thank you.” And then Vick dropped his hand, got up, and started walking towards the changing rooms saying, “I’m going to get out of this costume. Don’t go anywhere, okay?”

Jiyong chuckled to himself and yelled back saying, “Where else would I go?”

 

About 10 minutes later Jiyong's phone started ringing. He looked at the caller ID and then proceeded to answer it.

“Hey its been over an hour and a half, should we start heading back to the studio,” asked Seungri.

“Yeah, sure thing. We just finished actually. See you in a bit.”

He was packing up some of his equipment when Vick walked back out into the studio. He looked up and saw that the man acted like nothing had happened in the past hour, except for the look in his eyes. Vick walked over to where Jiyong was standing and tried to start talking to him, “Umm… I… I don’t… I don’t normally do this but for some reason I feel like we’ve grown closer in this short amount of time. And I don’t really have that many people who I can talk to, so I was wondering if-“

Just then the door opened with the crew walking into the studio returning from their outing.

Before anyone could notice them, Vick leaned down and whispered into Jiyongs ear, “Can I call you sometime. Like when I get back from Japan?”

Jiyong's stomach did a third flip that day as he looked up at Vick. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his business card, handing it to Vick. Vick took it and stuffed it into his pants pocket as Daesung came up to both of them and asked, “So, how did it go?”


	7. Chapter 7

On the way to the airport Daesung knew something was different about Vick. The man who always had something to say, or had something to yell at him about, just sat in the back seat looking out the window. Finally Daesung couldn’t take it anymore and asked, “Is everything okay?”

Vick didn’t respond so he asked again, “Are you okay?” Again no answer. Daesung was getting aggravated at the lack of response so when they pulled up to a red light, he turned around and got as close to Vick as he could.

“Listen I don’t know what happened in that studio after we left, but you are really starting to worry me. We have a press conference in Japan in less than 24 hours so you better pull yourself together and act like the Vick everyone knows.”

Vick was still looking out the window as he heard Daesung talking and when his manager finished, he gave a small half hearted smile. He took his sunglasses off and looked at him.

Daesung could only feel guilty once he looked at the face Vick showed him. The only other time he had seen him this troubled was about 5 years ago when Vick’s mother called him. She told him she didn’t want to be burdened by her son’s celebrity status. She just wanted to live a quiet life and to have no one bother her.

It was the last time Vick and his mother talked.

The car behind him honked its horn and Daesung turned back, continued driving, as Vick continued to look out the window. After a few minutes he broke the silence and asked in a concerned voice, “What happened in there?”

They were pulling up to the airport when Vick replied, “I told him about my parents.” The car came to stop by the drop off. Before he could put the car into park, Vick got out of the car and started to get his bag from the trunk.

Daesung sat in the driver’s seat stunned until Vick came up to the outside window and tapped on the glass, breaking him out of his daze. Vick handed him his bag as he got out of the car and said, “I have a lot going on in my head right now so can we just keep the chatter to a minimum until we get to Japan. Please?”

Daesung clapped him on the shoulder and nodded. Vick took the lead walking toward the entrance and he followed right behind him. He noticed the slump in Vick’s shoulders, knowing full well what the weight of talking about his parents did to him. He could only pray that Vick would get back to normal by the time they got off the plane.

 

Going through the motions of typical airport travel went by in a daze. Vick could only think about the shoot and about Jiyong. Despite portraying asshole every day to the public, he knew deep down that he was just a child. The only reason he started acting like that was to protect himself. Daesung always compared him to an abused dog. He hated how accurate the description actually was. The dog will always snap at others because it thinks everyone will hurt it, and only will select a few to trust. And as of right now, Daesung was the only person he trusted.

But for some reason, Jiyong was slowly breaking down the wall Vick had put up. And he couldn’t understand why.

They boarded the plane and Vick turned to Daesung saying, “I’m going to sleep on the way. Don’t wake me up unless the plane is crashing.”

Daesung said, “Sure thing.” Glad to hear a little sass from him.

Vick grabbed his neck pillow and started to get settled in for the flight. As he was dozing off his mind was spinning with thoughts of the young photographer.

Just before falling into his dream he heard the flight attendant say, “And thank you for flying with us. Enjoy your flight.”

The picture of Jiyong with shadows across his face in the studio was the image that guided him into his dreams…

 

_It must have been because he had been talking about his past in the last couple hours, that he started dreaming about this. But what surprised him was that it wasn’t of his parents._

_He found himself in the park next to one of the houses he lived in when he was younger. He knew exactly where he was the moment he saw that he was on the rusty yellow swing set. This playground was in the same town where he remembers his only childhood friend. He looked around at all the small details that had erased themselves over time, like the graffitied green slide, or the broken first step that led up to the top of the jungle gym._

_Then he glanced to the swing next to him and saw another boy swinging. The boy looked over to him with a big smile on his face and said, “Hyung you better hurry up! I’m gonna beat you to the sky!”_

_His memory kicked in and he let himself be sucked in to relive it._

_“As if you could ever beat me,” he exclaimed to the boy as he started pumping his legs to gain momentum._

_They raced to see who could go higher until he decided to give up, jumping off the swing at its peak height. When he fell to the ground he rolled and ended up on his back looking to the bright blue sky. He heard the boy exclaim, “Haha I won!” As he too jumped and landed a couple feet away from him. He rolled over onto his stomach to look at the younger boy who still smiling. The boy breathlessly said, “Hyung… you should… buy us ice cream… since you lost.”_

_His face fell into a pout at his comment and the boy bursted out laughing, which cause him to laugh along with him._

_The dream jumped to the two of them sitting on top of the jungle gym eating ice cream and looking up at the setting sun together. He had finished his own when the boy shoved his in his face and said, “I don’t want the rest. You take it.” He kept moving it closer and closer to his face until he took it from him. Once the boy was rid of the ice cream he leaned over and grabbed his backpack, taking out his sketch pad and pencils._

_He remembered that the boy would always find an opportunity to draw no matter where they went, and the thought of ice cream couldn’t even distract him. So he sat there licking the ice cream as he watched the boy start to draw the sunset in front of them. It always fascinated him at how good the boy was at drawing, despite being so young._

_He went to ask the boy a question but when he tried to say his name, his throat closed up, preventing him from speaking. He tried again and again but nothing would come out of his mouth. He started to wave to get the boys attention but he was too focused on his drawing. Vick tried yelling and waving, but nothing was working, until he realized why._

_He couldn’t remember the boy’s name. He himself or his younger version could not remember._

_He started to panic and was getting a sick feeling in his stomach as he looked at the boy. Shadows from the setting sun danced across his face as he concentrated on his drawing. He felt a tickle in the back of his mind, triggering a memory that just out of his reach._

_The boy had finished his drawing and looked over to him asking, “Hyung, how’s it look?”_

_The world around them started to get darker, and the boy looked at him with a quizzical face._

_“Hyung?” The boys voice started sounding weird, distant. “Hyuung?”_

_He tried to reply as it got darker and darker, but still nothing would come out._

_“Hyung? Seunghyun-ah?” The boys voice sounded like a distant echo. “Seunghyun-ah!”_

_The world was almost pitch black as he tried to get the boys attention with all that he had, but to no avail._

_The boys voice was changing tone and started sounding… closer._

_“Seunghyu… Sueung….Seu..ick…Se..ick”_

 

“Vick!” Daesung exclaimed, waking him from his dream.

He shot up to find him leaning over the seat in front of him.

“We’re here. Come on let’s get off.”

Vick looked outside the tiny window to find that they were indeed docked at the terminal. He stood up to stretch, wiping the sleep from his eyes, when Daesung asked, “Did you have a bad dream? You kept tossing and turning in your seat.”

He blinked at his manger and gave him a blank face. He thought back to his dream and said, “I.. I...umm… I can’t remember.”

Daesung hopped out of his seat saying, “Oh well, let’s get moving.”

He stood still trying to remember the dream he just had.

“Come on! We need to meet up with the event coordinator soon,” said Daesung as he started walking off the plane.

Vick furrowed his brows because he knew there was something he needed to remember, he just couldn’t. He grabbed his bag and walked off the plane to join his manager. The entire time of walking through the airport he kept trying to think back to what he dreamt about. A couple times he almost ran into people, but before he could Daesung pulled him out of the way saying, “Pay attention, jeez!”

As he walked out the doors, he squinted at the setting sun and in that moment the dream came rushing back to him.

“Jiyong,” he whispered to himself.

Finally able to say the name he couldn’t in the dream.


	8. Chapter 8

Waiting outside the doors of the press conference, Daesung could not take his eyes off the man sitting across from him. Ever since they left the airport yesterday, he noticed that Vick had been acting strange. Not the typical heartless actor that’s caused him nothing except trouble, but the Vick he first met 8 years ago.

Daesung and Vick went to college together and ended up becoming friends over a class project. Granted back then he wasn’t known as Vick, his real name is Seunghyun, and he used to be a quiet antisocial person. After hanging out a couple times for the project he and Seunghyun began to form a bond, which turned into this 8 year friendship.

He was the only person Seunghyun talked to about his modeling jobs and how he was just doing it to pay for school. He was first person Seunghyun told that he was wanting to quit school and just focus on being a model. He was the first person Seunghyun told about being asked to act in a commercial, about being asked to sign an acting contract, and the person Seunghyun asked to his be manager.

Daesung was also the _only_ person Seunghyun told that he was gay.

He was the one person who had been with Seunghyun through all his up and downs over the years. He helped him through his parents drama, and was there when he talked to his mother for the last time. He was the one who suggested using a stage name and start a new life so Seunghyun could try to move on.

Back then, Daesung would have said there was no way in hell that Seunghyun would turn out to be the arrogant, rude, obnoxious, Vick that he is today. However, he got used to it over the years because he understood it was just a defense mechanism. But when Vick started acting weird at the airport yesterday, he would have never guessed he would be seeing “Seunghyun” for this long.

Whenever Vick would stop talking and basically shut down, Daesung liked to call it the “Seunghyun” side. It was very rare for Vick to act like this for such a constant amount of time. Usually when something would happen, he would snap back and forth between the two personalities during a couple hours of the day, but this time it lasted for over 18 hours and counting.

The event planner walked up and told Daesung that the press conference would be starting in five minutes, and to get ready to walk in. Once he left, Daesung crossed the room and went to sit next to Vick. Vick looked up at the approaching man knowing exactly what he was going to say, and before he could, he spoke first.

“Look, I know I haven’t been acting like ‘myself’ since yesterday. And I know you don’t want me to go out there like this.” Vick motioned to his slouched position as he continued, “All I’m asking is for you to trust me. I’m going to go in there and act like the person they want me to be for the last time. Yesterday I realized something, well not just something, but I realized who I have become. And I don’t like him.”

Daesung raised an eyebrow and said, “So you finally noticed how much of an ass you’ve been these past couple of years?”

Vick looked over at him and saw the small smile playing across his face, knowing that Daesung was messing with him. But he knew that there was truth in the man’s statement. He smiled back and continued, “Yes. I know, I’ve always known. But as I look back at how these years have been, and how my future might be because of them, I’m just tired. Tired of hating myself everyday and being alone.”

“Well, thanks. Guess I don’t count for anything,” scoffed Daesung.

Vick glared at him for a second and said, “You know how much your friendship means to me, and besides I would never end it because you have too much information to blackmail me with.”

“Oh you have no idea how much I actually have. Did you know you talk in your sleep?”

Vicks face paled as he stared at Daesung, with a million thoughts running through his head. Daesung chuckled at Vicks’ reaction and said, “Now there’s something one doesn’t see every day, ‘The Great Vick’ scared.”

Vick relaxed and pushed Daesung away, both of them quietly laughing. Then he started talking again, “But really, in all seriousness, I will change. I don’t know how long it will take but I want to be myself again. Like how we first started out. I want to be Seunghyun.”

The event planner walked back into the room and said, “The press conference is starting, if you would please follow me.” He bowed and motioned for Vick and Daesung to walk through the door he entered from.

Daesung got up first and lowered his hand toward Vick helping him out of his chair. Before moving to follow the event planner Daesung whispered to Vick, “No matter what you decide to do, or what happens because of it, I will always be your friend. Your brother.”

Vick wrapped his arm around the younger man, giving him a small hug, and whispered back, “Why do you always have to be so cheesy?” He pulled away and started walking toward the door and shouted back, “Come on, I want to get this thing over with so I can get some more sleep.”

Daesung stared in awe at the retreating figure and thought it was scary how easily Vick could slip through personalities so quickly. But as Vick turned to walk through the door, Daesung noticed the same slump in his shoulders that he had at the airport yesterday. He could tell change was coming to Vick, he just didn’t know if it would damage him more or not. He knew he would be there for Vick when he needed him, and really that’s all he could do for now.

With that in mind, he followed Vick into the press conference.

 

The press conference was for a Japanese brand of clothing he was endorsing and to talk about his future projects. True to his word, Vick acted like Vick and everyone was enthralled by him. He answered all the questions in his own way and got through the press conference without anyone suspecting anything.

After talking to Daesung some more on the way back to the hotel, he realized that he needed to be alone for the rest of his stay in Japan. He wanted to sort out everything that he had been feeling since he left Korea, like his family problems and how he was going to change. But mainly he wanted to think about how he was going to deal with Jiyong, now that he remembered who he was.

His only childhood friend, the person who he thought would be beside him forever. But he was also the person who Vick had a dark place in his heart for. No matter how many memories he remembered from the past of them being best friends together, one memory stood out the most.

The day that Jiyong disappeared.

All he could remember was one day they were on the playground having a great time, but the next day, Jiyong and his family disappeared without telling anyone where or why they left.

His best friend had abandoned him without a trace. And then two days later, his parents told him they were splitting. Jiyong was the start of it all.

That week from his childhood, that anger and resentment, was the fuel that kept Vick going all these years. But now that Jiyong had appeared in front of him again, after all this time, the fuel seemed to have run dry.

Instead of being angry with Jiyong he realized today that he didn’t want to dwell in the past any longer. He just wanted to get to know the present Jiyong, become friends with him, and start over.

And maybe one day he would reveal who he really is to him.

Not Vick the actor, but Seunghyun. The _real_ Seunghyun.


	9. Chapter 9

After the shoot with Vick, Jiyong had little time to rest with a nonstop schedule of meetings and last minute preparations for his first exhibition in Korea tomorrow. When he finished for the day, he walked upstairs from the studio to his apartment dragging his feet along the way. It had been an exhausting week and all he wanted to do was change into pajamas and curl up on the couch with a nice cup of hot tea, which is exactly what he did.

He opened the door, walked down the hallway and placed his computer bag and camera on the kitchen table. Once he changed, he made his way into the kitchen to start making his tea. He had put the kettle on the stove and decided to sit down on the couch to wait for it to heat up.

As he was starting to nod off to sleep, he heard his phone vibrating on the coffee table beside him. He stared at it deciding whether or not to pick up, thinking it might be Seungri with another last minute detail change. But after a couple of seconds the phone stopped vibrating as if the person decided to hang up. He shrugged, thankful that he didn’t have to move to answer, however a second later he heard it buzz again. He saw the little notification light blink signaling he received a new text message. After staring at the light for a minute or two he finally decided to reach over and pick up the phone to see who it was.

He first saw that the number was not one he recognized, but as he opened the message, he jumped about 5 feet in the air as the tea kettle started whistling. He dropped his phone and scrambled to grab it before it hit the floor. But he reflexes weren’t fast enough because of his exhaustion, and his phone crashed on the ground face down. He leaned down to pick it up and as he turned it over he let out a sigh of relief because his phone did not break. Setting the phone on the coffee table, Jiyong moved to the kitchen to fix up his tea.

As he walked out of the kitchen he decided not to bother with his phone or the message because he didn’t know the number. If someone really wanted to get a hold of him, they could do it tomorrow. He finished his tea and retired to bed, wanting to get some sleep before his Saturday photoventure tomorrow morning and the exhibition opening later that night.

 

By the time Jiyong woke up and went out to take photo’s, he had forgotten all about the text message from last night. He spent a good 2-3 hours just walking the streets of some random part of town and let the flow of people guide him around. Eventually Seungri called him telling him that it was getting close for them to meet up at the gallery to do the last touch ups before the event tonight.

On his way home he stopped at Something More Café for his usual pick-me-up. As he was waiting for the drink to be made he looked up on the TV and saw some random celebrity news show playing. He didn’t really pay attention to it until he heard a familiar name being discussed.

“And last but certainly not least, we have the latest news on the one and only Vick, the man who is continually breaking barriers for young Korean actors. With the success of his newest overseas film, a Japanese clothing line chose Vick to be their model for their latest line. This past week Vick spent time in Japan going over details with the company heads.” As the host continued talking about Vicks trip to Japan, they started showing clips from the press conference.

Jiyong watched as the clips passed by on the screen and remembered how a week ago today he worked with him. He thought back to the photo shoot and how the man on the screen now, and the man from last week were two completely different people. It got him thinking of what really made Vick tick. Vick had told him about his past with his parents but for some reason he wanted to know more.

The TV showed some older photo’s of the actors talking about his growth in the industry. But one photo, a close up where Vick was staring straight at the camera, took Jiyong off guard. The photo was stunning and he could see how a lot of women would fall for him. As he stared at it his heart started racing, it was almost like Vick himself was looking right at him. He flashed back to when they were alone in his studio and how Vick stared at him then too, he felt his stomach do a little flip just like it had done that day.

All of a sudden a drink appeared in front of him. “I’ve been calling you for the past minute,” said a voice to his left.

Jiyong looked over to where the voice was coming from and saw Soran staring at him. She looked from him, to the TV and back to him, causing a slight blush to appear on his cheeks. Raising her eyebrow she said, “Wow, even Jiyong can’t hide his attraction to the captivating mystery that is Vick.”

Jiyong went bug eyed and tried to stammer through some sort of retort in his defense but it was too late. Soran had read right through him, as she always does, and she just waved off his mumblings as she sat across from him.

“Don’t try to deny it. I saw how you were ogling the TV. But never mind your celebrity crushes, I just want to know how fancy this gallery exhibit opening thing is going to be tonight.”

Jiyong started to calm down from his fluster that was cause by Soran. He had forgotten that he invited her and the other employees to tonight’s event.

“Oh um, it’s actually a black tie event. Not my doing, but the galleries’. So I would say wear-“

“Ok that’s all I wanted to know,” Soran said cutting him off. “You can now go back to your little dream world of Vick,” she smirked, hopped up from her seat and skipped back to the counter.

Jiyong sat with his mouth hanging open as he watched her go back to work. Soran glanced over at him and gave him a mischievous wink. She was lucky that he thought of her like a little sister because not every could get away with the comments she just made.

He slouched down in his seat with his mind running wild from what she said. ‘Even Jiyong can’t hide his attraction to the captivating mystery that is Vick.’ Was that it? Was he attracted to Vick? No he couldn’t be. Vick was a complete jerk. But that was just his first impression, right? Vick showed a whole different side to him when they were alone. He became vulnerable, gentle, a different person.

Jiyong heard the echo of Vick’s soft laughter from that day in the back of his mind. His heart skipped a beat and he sucked in a breath.

In that moment he realized Soran was right. He was captivated.

He felt his phone buzzing in his pocket and fished it out. Looking at the caller ID he answered it as he started moving to the door to leave. “Yes Seungri, I’m almost there.” He turned to wave goodbye to Soran and walked out. “Ok, I know. Just grab my suit from my closet and have the car ready to go. I’ll see you in five minutes.”

 

The exhibition was going perfect as far as Jiyong could tell. This collection was one of his simplest, being comprised of photos from his point of view of coming back to Korea. Even though he has lived in big cities such as New York and L.A., Seoul was completely different. He wanted to capture the beauty of the mixture of traditional Korean culture and a metropolitan city. And from how everyone was reacting, he had accomplished it.

All the art critics, celebrities, socialites and other photographers were here. Some of his favorite models, makeup artists, and even old friends from America had showed up. Everyone walked around the gallery with champagne in hand, observing his work. He was always one of those artists that liked to hide away in a corner until the event was over with, but since this was his first showing in Korea, he had countless interviews to do and people to meet.

2 hours into the showing, Jiyong found himself finished with the last interview and decided to take a walk around the gallery. People stopped, congratulated him and gave him words of praise for such a beautiful collection. He walked passed Seungri who was chatting up some of the models and shook his head. Leave to Seungri to always find the pretty girls and talk their ears off.

He continued toward the back of the gallery wanting to get away and have some time to himself. Finding an empty chair he sat and watched as everyone had a good time. After a while he could tell that the event was winding down as the crowd became thinner.

Jiyong saw a familiar face walking towards him and he smiled as he stood to greet her. Soran smiled back , giving him a slight hug and said, “Jiyong, this is beautiful.”

“Thank you. Glad you enjoyed it.”

“Well of course I did. I’ve always been curious as to what you did over in ‘your lair’ in the café. And now that I do…” She paused looking around at all the photos, then continued, “They’re simply amazing.”

He chuckled, a little embarrassed. He wasn’t used to getting this much praise.

“Again, thank you.”

Her phone beeped and she dug it out of her purse to read the text message. After a second she looked up and said, “I should get going, the other girls say they’re almost done. And besides the shows almost over, right?”

He looked at his watch and realized that indeed his was almost time to start shutting down for the night. But before he could say goodbye, he heard some sort of commotion coming from the front of the gallery. Both of them looked at each other, Jiyong scrunched his eyebrows and Soran shrugged her shoulders saying she didn’t know what was going on either.

Together they walked toward the entrance and saw that the people who were still around were forming a small crowd. Jiyong spotted his assistant and asked, “Seungri what happened? Is someone hurt?”

Seungri shook his head and replied, “I don’t know. I just heard it too.”

Jiyong saw that the crowd was starting to dissipate as a tall figure moved from the center of it. Soran moved closer to Jiyong and whispered into his ear, “Is that who I think it is?” When Jiyong didn’t respond, she looked at him and saw that his mouth was slightly opened in shock. She tapped his chin and whispered again, “Jiyong, I know he’s breathtaking but keeping your mouth open like that might scare him away.” Jiyong snapped out of it and glared at her because once again he couldn’t believe the things that came out of her sometimes.

Once the man was close enough, he spoke in his deep voice that Jiyong knew far too well and asked, “I’m not too late to see the exhibit, am I?”

Jiyong stared at him for a few seconds until he felt Soran elbow him slightly in the ribs. His throat had dried up the moment he saw him, but somehow Jiyong found his voice and muttered, “Um… No Vick. It’s not too late.”


	10. Chapter 10

_Once the man was close enough, he spoke up by asking, “I’m not too late to see the exhibit, am I?”_

_Jiyong stared at him for a few seconds until he felt Soran elbow him slightly in the ribs. His throat had dried up the moment he saw him, but somehow Jiyong found his voice and muttered, “Um… No Vick. It’s not too late.”_

 

“Great, I was worried that I would be. My flight was delayed, but I came as soon as I could.”

“What? But… Why did you come?”

A flash of pain went across Vick’s face as Jiyong said those words. He didn’t think anyone else could tell what it was, but since the shoot last week, he knew Vick’s emotions and what they looked like.

Soran whispered to herself, “Well that was rude.”

Jiyong realized what he said and tried to explain himself, “No, sorry. I mean… I thought you in Japan. Well obviously you’re not now. But why-“ he stopped himself from rambling on and looked around to see that all the people who were still left over from the event were watching them have this conversation.

Heat started to rise in his cheeks from embarrassment as he cleared his throat and looked over at his assistant for some help. Seungri jumped into action and started asking people if they could please start making their way out the door, wishing they would enjoy the rest of their night and so on.

Soran, Vick, and Jiyong all stood in the middle of the room as it started to clear out. Soran leaned over to Jiyong and said, “I didn’t know you were actually on talking terms with him. How long have you known him?”

“About a week.”

“Wow, you move fast don’t ya.”

Jiyong cut his eyes to the side and glared at her, but all she did was give him a little eyebrow raise. She giggled faintly and then turned to Vick and said, “It’s nice to meet you, I’m Soran, Jiyong's friend.” She bowed and waited for his response.

“Nice to meet you as well, I’m Vick.” He bowed and then held out his hand to shake hers. She looked at her phone again and then quickly said, “Well it’s getting late so I’ll be on my way.” She turned to Jiyong and gave him a kiss on the cheek and quickly whispered, “Enjoy yourself.” As she pulled away, still facing him, she wiggled her eyebrows and then skipped off towards the door.

Jiyong gawked at her as she left and then noticed that Vick was staring at him. His heart started racing as more color rose to his cheeks.

“I hope you don’t mind, I kind of invited myself.”

“No… No its okay…”

“I didn’t mean for everyone to leave.”

“It was getting close to ending anyway,” Jiyong mumbled.

Vick stepped closer to him and said, “I was just hoping you could show me around.”

Jiyong looked up at the man, flustered at his sudden advancement and stuttered, “Oh...ok.”

Seungri walked up and told Jiyong that mostly everyone had left and that he was leaving too. As the young man walked out, Jiyong looked at Vick who had not taken his eyes off of him the entire time. Jiyong adjusted his tie a little and smoothed down his coat front not knowing what to do, until Vick cleared his throat and asked, “So. Where are we going to start?”

Jiyong perked up and said, “Oh right. Um…” he looked around the gallery as his mind drew a blank on where to start.

“Can we start with that one?” Jiyong looked over to see where Vick was pointing. It wasn’t anything special, just a picture of a street market. But he was glad for the suggestion because he was still in shock that Vick had showed in the first place.

“Sure.”

Vick took the lead with Jiyong walking behind him toward the picture. After moving down a couple of pieces, Vick couldn’t take the silence any more so he asked, “Aren’t you going to ask why I came?” Jiyong jumped slightly at the sudden sound of his voice but was glad that Vick’s back was to him so he didn’t see it. He replied, “Yeah, I thought you were in Japan.”

“I was, but the meetings ended yesterday.”

“But why come here?”

“I don’t know.” Vick moved to the next picture. “Daesung told me about it and I was curious. Ever since last week, you’ve been on my mind, got me thinking about things.”

 

And that’s how the conversation started. Vick told Jiyong about how much the photo shoot affected him last week, how he wanted to see his other works, and how he basically wanted get to know him better. Jiyong was taken aback at the man’s forwardness but deep down inside he became excited.

As they moved to the next room of the gallery, one picture in particular caught Vick’s eye. It was of a little boy sitting under a tree reading a book. As soon as he saw it he walked right over and took in every detail. A small smile spread across his face as he thought back to this past week and how he remembered Jiyong from his childhood. Vick let out a small “huh” as Jiyong came up behind him.

“Do you like it?”

“Yes. It reminds me of a friend I used to have growing up. Except he would always draw instead of read.”

As Vick continued to look at the photograph it gave Jiyong a moment to study the man. He had worn a classic black suit with a skinny tie but worn deep crimson shoes for that wow factor he’s always known for. Jiyong had to admit that Vick looked good in that outfit, but what really got his heart racing was the peacefulness that seemed to have taken over his face. It was something he didn’t get to see last week. The more he looked at Vick the more he realized that something was different from the last time they met. But he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

Vick could feel that Jiyong was staring at him, so without moving his head he asked, “Do I have something on my face?”

Jiyong looked away quickly and internally yelling at himself for being caught. Vick chuckled as Jiyong apologized, “Sorry. I was… um…”

Vick turned towards him and as he walked passed on his way to the next photo. As he was right behind the younger man he leaned closer and whispered, “It's okay. I’ve done it too, you just never caught me.”

Vick saw Jiyong stiffen as he continued moving forward and he smirked to himself. He decided that his new favorite thing to do was to make him flustered. Changing the topic and trying to get Jiyong to relax, Vick picked out a couple photo’s and asked him to explain where and why he took them.

 

After about half an hour of walking around Jiyong and Vick were starting to be more comfortable with each other. They joked with each other and learned new things about one another, all while going through the gallery. As they made their way toward the front, an awkward silence fell over them. They stopped at the front of the door and hovered there for a minute, each waiting for the other to speak.

Vick broke the silence by saying, “You know, I actually tried calling you last night.”

Jiyong, who had been looking at the floor, looked up at Vick as the older man continued.

“It was like, around midnight, and once I realized what time it was…” He sighed and continued, “I don’t know… for some reason I freaked out and ended hanging up before you could answer.”

“That was you?”

Vick laughed at himself and started rubbing the back of his head as he went on, “Yeah, sorry about that. I sent a text message right afterward, apologizing for calling so late, but realized that I would still be bothering you once I sent it.”

“No, it's okay. Sorry I didn’t reply. You weren’t bothering me. It’s just been a long week and when I saw that the message was from a number I didn’t recognize, I didn’t read it.”

“Oh, yeah... That’s understandable.” Vick was a little disappointed and Jiyong could tell, so he quickly responded.

“Don’t worry, next time you text me I’ll reply.”

Vick perked up at Jiyong's comment and decided to tease him a little.

“So you want me to text you more?”

Jiyong blushed and his heart started racing at Vicks comment, but before he could respond, Vick spoke again, “I mean, only if you want. I don’t get many chances to hang out with anyone like this… just being able to talk casually...” They locked eyes and stared at each other for a minute. Vick held his breath as he waited for him to respond.

As they looked at each other, Jiyong recognized that there was something about Vick he didn’t realize before. Despite acting like an arrogant actor sometimes, Vick had an innocence tucked away and Jiyong was starting to see it surface.

Vick looked at him with some sort of longing for acceptance, and Jiyong almost couldn’t hold back his smile as he said, “No, I would actually really like to. Hang out I mean.”

Vick released the breath he had been holding and wanted to jump up and down as he heard Jiyong’s reply, but he thought it best to not act like a complete fool. Instead he smiled slightly and replied with, “Cool.”

Both of them smiled at each other and then Vick felt his phone vibrate. He pulled it out of his pocket and as he read the text from Daesung, his smile faded a little.

“I’m sorry, as much as I want to keep talking, I actually should be getting home. I have a meeting in the morning.”

Jiyong nodded and replied, “Yeah same here.” A little disappointed that their time together was coming to an end, he lowered his head.

“Hey but listen,” Vick said so Jiyong would look at him again. When he did, he looked him in the eyes and as sincerely as he could he said, “I really did enjoyed tonight.”

Jiyong’s stomach did a little flip as he softly said, “Me too. I’m glad you came.”

Again they smiled at each other and after a couple awkward goodbyes they parted ways. Jiyong watched Vick walk out the front door and before he got in his car he turned around and waved. Jiyong bit his lip slightly and waved back as Vick got in the car and drove off. He felt like a little school girl the way his heart and mind were racing.

Once he composed himself, he went to go find the security guard to lock up the building and leave for the evening. He hailed a taxi to take him back to his apartment and half way there he heard his phone beep. Pulling it out of his jacket he read the text message.

_Just wanted you to have my number again so you won’t ignore me._

_I know you said you were busy tomorrow but how about the next day?_

_Would you want to get some lunch perhaps?_

 

Vick was pulling up to his apartment when he felt his phone vibrate. His heart started pounding in anticipation of what the text message might say. He fumbled to grab it out of his pocket while sitting in the car. He opened it up and read Jiyong’s reply.

_Lunch would be nice. Let me know where and when._


	11. Chapter 11

They agreed to meet at noon, at a place Vick suggested, a little restaurant that had western food and was one of his favorite places to eat. But at 11:30 Vick was already sitting at a table waiting for Jiyong to arrive. Last night Vick had trouble sleeping because Jiyong was the only thing on his mind. When he had his eyes opened he thought of the present Jiyong, but when he closed them, he dreamed of his childhood Jiyong. He went back and forth all night long, slipping in and out of sleep, tossing and turning. And right now he was feeling the effects of his restless night.

As he waited for Jiyong to arrive he ordered a cup of coffee, hoping that it would wake him up a wee bit before he came, and thought back to the night of the exhibition.

He thought about all the beautiful photographs that Jiyong took. All the different places in the city he had never been to before. Or how Jiyong made him see things he had never noticed before about the city. Also the way he explained and described them, anyone could tell that it was really his true passion.

But the thing that stood out the most from that night was how comfortable Jiyong and he had become with one another in such a short amount of time. It almost felt like they were kids again. Granted they only spent maybe an hour together, but it was enough to solidify something for Vick.

He needed Jiyong back in his life. Even if Jiyong doesn’t remember him, he needs to have someone who is thoughtful, compassionate, and gentle to help him change into the better person he wants to be.

Vick looked at his phone to check the time and realized that it was already 12:15. He was just about to text the missing man, when the door to the restaurant opened and in walked a windblown Jiyong.

Vick’s heart skipped a beat as he watched Jiyong scan the occupants to find him. He was wearing a fitted navy blue wool jacket, a grey scarf, and a black beanie that showed some of his blonde hair peeking out of the front. But what had gotten his heart beating faster, was not the clothes, but the cherry red cheeks and nose that Jiyong must have gotten from walking in the cold.

He watched as Jiyong stood on his tiptoes to gain a better view to find him. He must have been getting frustrated with not being able to spot him because he started to bite his lip. When Vick saw that little gesture, he thought his heart would burst. How can someone be that cute when they’re just looking around a room?

Vick was lost in his own thoughts because he was startled when Jiyong finally come over to the table.

“There you are. I am so sorry I’m late. I was walking over here and I got a little lost and then I saw some things that I wanted to photograph and-“ Jiyong stopped talking because of the way Vick was looking at him. “Are you okay? Am I rambling too much? I tend to do that sometimes.”

Vick just watched as the young man fidgeted in front of him, loving how adorable he always looks when he gets flustered. Finally he decided to let Jiyong off the hook and replied, “No no, it’s okay. I just got here too.” He bit his tongue as he told the little fib.

Jiyong sighed and smiled as he said, “Ok good. I hate when people have to wait because of me.” He pulled out the chair and sat down, placing his bag in the seat next to him and proceeded to take off his hat and scarf.

Silence fell over the two of them as Jiyong looked over the menu. Since Vick was a regular he already knew what he wanted, so he took this time to continue staring at Jiyong. He noticed Jiyong started doing something that Vick remembered from their childhood. As Jiyong read the menu, he used his finger to help him follow along and he silently mouthed the words. Vick remembered that Jiyong would do that because he always had a hard time reading Hangeul. Now he guessed that it had just became habit over time.

While still looking at the menu Jiyong spoke up and asked, “What do you recommend?” When he finished the question he looked up and found that Vick was watching him but as soon as they made eye contact Vick looked back at the menu. A little color rose to Jiyong's cheeks.

Without skipping a beat Vick answered, “Well depends on what you’re in the mood for. For something light maybe chicken salad, for something a little heavier they have great spaghetti or burgers. Really they have anything you could possibly want.” He glanced back to Jiyong and saw that he had looked back at the menu, nodding his head.

The waiter eventually came up, taking their orders, and left them to continue talking. They started talking about anything and everything. Almost as if their gallery conversation had never stopped. Vick talked about his stay in Japan. Jiyong talked about the shoot he did 2 days after Vick left.

“She was a dream to work with. I told her that the last model I had called me a dumbass.”

“Hey, I didn’t even really know who you were when I said that.”

“Yes, but you still said it.” Jiyong raised his eyebrow and glared at Vick.

Vick looked away from the younger mans judgmental gaze for a second and then look right into his eyes and said, “I truly am sorry about that. I was just having a bad morning.”

“Even so, you shouldn’t call people names.”

“Yes I know. I’m working on that.”

“Really, how so?” Jiyong took a sip of his water and waited for Vick.

Vick took a deep breath and thought about how he should answer.

“Well the photo shoot with you got me thinking about some things. Actually a lot of things.” Vick paused, drank some water, and continued. “As you probably guessed, talking about my past is something I try to avoid but for some reason I found it easy to talk about it with you. And afterward, on my way to Japan I remembered something’s and it made me realize…” He took another sip of water and looked at Jiyong. “It made me realize that I’ve become the type of person who an old friend would hate the most. And I don’t want to disappoint him any more than I already have.”

“And who is this old friend you’re speaking of?” Vick looked down and smiled to himself at Jiyong's question. “If he can change Vick this much, I’d like to meet him.”

Vick looked back to Jiyong, still smiling, “Maybe I’ll introduce you someday. But I haven’t talked to him in years. He might not remember me.”

“With a face like yours, I’d doubt it.” Jiyong clapped his hand over his mouth as soon as he finished. His face turned a vibrant shade of red as he realized he had said those words out loud. Thankfully their food arrived at that exact moment and Jiyong could not have been happier to see a plate of spaghetti.

Vick watched as Jiyong flustered about trying to use their food as a distraction, laughing to himself. He let Jiyong believe that it did indeed distract him and they began to eat.

They continued to talk, skipping over Jiyong's little comment, and started talking about random things here and there. They talked about their favorite foods, types of music, movies, and books. And they found out that they actually had a lot more in common.

 

They had finished eating and were walking out the door as Jiyong was putting his scarf back on. He started to say something about enjoying lunch when he spotted something down at the end of the street. He started walking towards it taking out his camera and then crouched down. Vick walked up behind him trying to see what had interested him, but couldn’t see what it was. Finally Jiyong stood up and turned around bumping into Vick.

“Oh, I didn’t think you had followed me. Sorry about running off like that.”

“What did you see?”

Jiyong looked down at his camera, fiddled with it, and then turned it towards Vick. The picture was of a little girl bundled up in jackets and scarves, running around with a bright yellow balloon in hand. What stood out the most was that the little girl and her balloon were the only things in color. Vick looked up and realized that they were right next to a business building, and the crowd was full of people wearing monotone colored suites.

He looked back down at Jiyong and said, “You really do have an eye for things. I can’t believe you saw that from all the way back there.”

“I didn’t see the girl really. I just saw this little burst of yellow popping up and I got curious.”

Jiyong looked back at his camera to look over the pictures he had just taken. Vick watched as he slowly started biting his lip again, another habit he must have picked up. But this habit was going to be the death of Vick if he didn’t do something to make the young man stop.

Without thinking really, Vick brought his hand up towards the top of Jiyong's head and ruffled his hair a bit. Jiyong scrunched down at the contact and froze for a minute.

This felt familiar for some reason. He looked up at Vick and stared at him. Why did this feel so familiar? There was something just on the edge on his memories. He thought and thought until something in the back of his mind clicked. And then he sucked in his breath.

“Hey Jiyong. Earth to Jiyong.” Vick said as he waved his hand in front of the young man’s face.

“Huh... Wh-what. Oh sorry.”

“Are you okay? You’ve gotten pale all of the sudden.”

Jiyong blinked and looked away mumbling, “O-oh ye-yeah, I’m… I’m fine. I…uh… just remembered that I have something that I need to talk to Seungri about. I’ll see you later.”

Jiyong started to walk away when Vick caught up with him.

“Hey wait, are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yes I’m fine.” Vick reached for his shoulder and turned him around. When he looked at Jiyong again he saw that the man looked normal. Color was back in his cheeks and a slight smile on his face. “See I’m fine.”

“Ok. I’ll… umm… text you later then?”

“Yeah that sounds good. Maybe we can meet up for lunch again.”

“Yeah sure…”

Jiyong waved goodbye and left Vick standing in the middle of the sidewalk with a confused look on his face. As soon as he turned the corner he stopped and leaned against the building. He looked up and saw his reflection in the window store front. His hair was all over the place from a moment ago when Vick ruffled it. As he brought his hand up to smooth it down he whispered to himself.

“He can’t be…”

He shook the thought out of his mind, reached into his bag and grabbed his beanie. He put it back on and continued walking down the street.


	12. Chapter 12

Over the next couple days Jiyong thought long and hard about what happened that day. He thought back to all the conversations he had had with Vick and what the older man had told him about his past. He wanted to go over everything and then make a final decision on whether or not his assumption was correct.

_His name is not really Vick. He said that he moved around a lot when he was a kid. He also said that he was heavy set when he was young and that he had lost weight and became fit toward the end of high school. When they were at the gallery Vick said something about having a childhood friend who drew._

When he really thought about their conversations and Vick talking about the past, there wasn’t much. All of those descriptions could be any kid really. And besides, Vick really only talked about his parents the day of the shoot and all their other conversations have been about them and their interests in the present.

But what kept on bugging Jiyong was what he did when they were outside the café. Vick had ruffled his hair. No one has ever done that except an old childhood friend, his only childhood friend to be exact.

Seunghyun was the only person Jiyong felt comfortable with growing up. He had had a hard time moving from America to Korea, but in the last year of being in Korea before he moved back, Seunghyun made him feel at home.

He remembered that they were inseparable; they were always playing and hanging out after school and on the weekends. And one thing that Seunghyun would always do before they said goodbye to each other was ruffle and mess up his hair. The first couple times Seunghyun did it, Jiyong would scrunch down because he wasn’t used to the contact, but after awhile it just became ritual and it didn’t bother him.

So when Vick touched his head that day, Jiyong's’ mind went spinning. He remembered feeling like he was 12 years old again. Also he remembered that he looked at Vick, trying to see any sign of familiarity in the man’s face. He must have seen something because he remembered freaking out for a minute and basically running away from Vick.

He felt bad for leaving Vick like that, but he was just in shock from the memories and the very rare chance that Vick could possibly be Seunghyun.

Eventually later that night Jiyong texted Vick and apologized some more and things went back to normal, at least a little bit.

 

They decided to meet up and hang out every once in a while when neither of them had schedules. They would go out to eat or grab coffee together and after a couple of weeks they created a very close friendship. Jiyong always kept the theory of Vick/Seunghyun in the back of his mind whenever they were together, but over time something more started to make itself known to him.

The more time he spent with Vick, the more he found out how captivated he had truly become.

Their first encounter was a horrible first impression. But since then, Jiyong could tell that the Vick from back then was not the Vick he knew now. And the one he knew now was becoming more kind and funny and just fun to be around.

And yes there was also the factor he started noticing just how attractive Vick was. When they did the photoshoot he saw right away that he was a good looking guy. But now that they had become closer, he was starting to develop feelings for him.

He knew it was dangerous and that it would never work out, but sometimes he would catch Vick looking at him and it would give him the slightest bit of hope. He never tried to make his feelings known because he didn’t want to spoil the friendship they already had.

 

Sometimes Vick would stop by the studio and watch Jiyong work. Seungri and all the other assistants were shocked the first time he walked in when they were doing a shoot for a jewelry line, but after a few more visits they got used to him being around.

When they were little Vick was always fascinated whenever Jiyong drew, and he was still fascinated by him now. He noticed that Jiyong turned into a different person whenever he held a camera. Whenever he was in the photographer state of mind he had this aura about him. It was like he was in charge, he knows what he wants, and works until he gets it. And honestly for Vick, demanding Jiyong was kind of a turn on, but he would never tell him that.

 

One week they were trying to think of a good day to meet up for coffee but both of them had really busy schedules. They decided that a Friday afternoon would be best but when Thursday night came around, Jiyong got call from Vick saying that his meeting on Saturday morning had been moved to Friday afternoon.

“Since we can’t meet Friday, how about Saturday?” Vick asked the Jiyong.

“But I have a meeting Saturday afternoon.”

“Well what about Saturday morning?”

“Saturday morning…” Jiyong paused and thought for a second. “Ok. But only if you feel like getting up early.”

“Early for what?”

“I have this thing I like to do on Saturday mornings where I go out to a random part of the city and just start taking pictures. Its how I got most of my photo’s from the exhibition a few weeks back. Usually I like to go alone cause it’s really the only time I get time to myself, but if that’s the only time we can meet…”

“Are you sure you’d want me to come with you?”

“Why not?”

“Well like you said, you like to do that by yourself.”

“I don’t mind if you come along, I mean it's gonna be the only time we can see each other for a while…”

“That’s true… So when and where do you want to meet.”

“Umm… There's this park that I like going to sometimes.”

Jiyong proceeded to give Vick directions to the park and they agreed on meeting at 8 a.m. on Saturday morning. Vick was actually kind of nervous the night before, he kept over thinking things. He was just excited to get to spend more time with Jiyong and to get closer to him. Really, Jiyong was his saving grace for his crazy life. Whenever he had a long day or something happened, he was the one Vick was turning to more and more. Jiyong was always there to listen and just be someone he could talk to.

 

Vick woke up extra early Saturday so he would have time to grab them some coffee, and then started making his way towards the park. It was a cold morning in January and no matter how many layers he had on he was still cold. He was thankful for the two hot drinks he was carrying and took a sip of his own as he turned the corner into the park.

Jiyong said to meet him by the playground just because it was a good landmark that was easy to find. As he was walking, he noticed that the park was fairly populated, despite the temperature. Mostly it was people out for their morning exercise but he saw a few business people probably taking the more scenic route on their way to work.

It took him a little longer than he planned to find the right path to the playground but eventually he saw it in the distance, but that wasn’t all he saw. As he got a little closer he could tell that there were two men standing next to the playground, and getting even closer he realized that one of them was Jiyong. His first thought was that the other man would be Seungri but when he was a few yards away he saw that the other person was definitely not Jiyong's assistant, and whoever the man was, he was arguing with Jiyong.

At first Vick wanted to run over and protect Jiyong from whomever this person was but as he started hearing bits of the argument he thought it best to hang back for a bit.

“I’ve called you at least a dozen times since then,” the other man yelled at Jiyong. Vick noticed that he was taller and slightly more built in comparison to Jiyong.

“And as you know, I ignored all of your calls. I told you back then and I’ll tell you again now, it was all a mistake. How did you even know I would be here today?”

The man smirked and sarcastically said “Please Jiyong, you’re a creature of habit. You always come here the first Saturday of every month.”

“Even so, you shouldn’t have come. I’m meeting someone.” Jiyong started to walk away from the man in the opposite direction that Vick was standing.

“Well they’re not here yet so you have time to talk to me,” the man yelled after him.

“But I don’t want to talk to you,” Jiyong turned around and yelled at the man trying to get his point across. “I said what I wanted to back then. My friend will be here any minute and I don’t want him to see you anywhere near here. So for the last time Jae, _we are over_ , so leave me alone!”

If Vick thought he was cold before, he was wrong. After he heard those words from Jiyong his heart froze in an instant and sent a chill down his spine. This Jae guy was an ex of Jiyong's? Was that what he was hearing? His mind was spinning with questions but he was pulled out of his thoughts as he heard Jae yell something back at Jiyong.

“Oh a ‘friend’,” he made air quotes and moved toward Jiyong getting angrier. “Is that what you call the people you use for a couple weeks and throw them away. Like me.”

“I never used you Jae. It-“ Jae cut him off and got right in Jiyong's face.

“Bullshit! _You_ were the one who would always called _me_ and ask _me_ to come over.”

“It was because I was in a new country and you were the first one to pay any attention to me! Is that what you want me to say? Is that what you really think our relationship was? Just hook ups? If you thought I just wanted attention from a good looking guy then you must not have known me at all. And the only reason I can think of that you want me back, is just to have someone in your bed. So no Jae, no matter how much you act like you cared for me, if that’s what you thought of me, then the only thing I want from you is to get out of my life for good.”

Jiyong turned on his heel and was about to walk off when Jae caught his arm and turn him back around. When Jae turned Jiyong around, his other hand came up as if was about to hit the younger man. As soon as Vick saw what was about to happen he ran towards them and stood in front of Jiyong. He moved so fast Vick didn’t realize that he had until he was in between Jiyong and Jae, staring the other man down.

“Vick, what are you doing here?” Vick could tell that Jiyong was panicked from his sudden appearance but he just kept glaring at Jae.

“Who the hell are you?” Jae snarled at Vick.

Vick didn’t answer right away, instead he lifted his hand that held Jiyong's drink and with a straight face said, “Got you some coffee, white mocha with an extra shot, right Jiyong?”

It took a Jiyong a second to realize that Vick was handing him a drink but he grabbed it nonetheless. Once the drink was out of his hand, Vick brought his up to his lips and took a sip, still looking at Jae. The other man was getting more aggravated and he said, “I don’t care who the hell you are, but you better get the fuck out of my face before-“

“Before what? You hit me? Like you were just about to hit Jiyong? I don’t think so. See here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to walk away, right now, out of this park and never speak or try to contact Jiyong, ever again. And if hear that you do, I will make it my personal goal that you never step foot in this city again.”

“ _What?_ Who the hell _are_ you?”

Vick took off his sunglasses and hat so Jae could see him, and from his reaction, he knew exactly who he was. Jae tried to hide his shock and play it off. He ignored what Vick said by looking to Jiyong and saying, “So you’re fucking you’re models now? If I had known how much you sleep around I would have never been with you.” Jae looked at Vick and then looked back at Jiyong and continued with, “Have fun with your famous boy toy.” And left without another word.

Vick watched Jae until he couldn’t see him any longer and then he turned to face Jiyong. The younger man was looking in the same direction Vick just was, standing in shock at what had happened. Vick brought his free hand up to Jiyong's shoulder and ever so slightly shook the younger man to get his attention.

“Hey, Jiyong. It’s okay, he left don’t worry about it anymore.”

Jiyong had so many things going through his head at that moment that he didn’t even know where to start. All he wanted to do today was spend some time with Vick and have a nice morning, but Jae popped out of know where and started bringing up their past. The worst thing about it all was that apparently Vick had heard everything or at least most of their conversation.

Out of all his past relationships, Jiyong never wanted to talk about Jae with anyone, let alone with the man he was currently falling for. And now Vick heard what Jae thought about him, about "sleeping around"… he was at a total loss on what to do.

Vick shook Jiyong harder trying to snap him out of shock and it finally worked. Jiyong slowly looked up at Vick with a pained expression on his face. Vick leaned down so he could be eye level with him and said, “Hey listen to me, don’t let what that asshole said get to you. We may have only met a few weeks ago, but if you’re like me, I feel like we have showed each other who we really are. And from what I know, you’re nothing like what he said.”

All Jiyong could respond with was nodding his head. Vick continued with, “Here, let’s forget about taking pictures, how about we go somewhere and get breakfast. You look like you could use some food.” Again Jiyong nodded.

“Ok come on, it’s cold out here,” Vick said as he moved his hand from Jiyong's’ shoulder to the middle of his back and guided him out of the park.


	13. Chapter 13

_“Ok come on, it’s cold out here,” Vick said as he moved his hand from Jiyong's’ shoulder to the middle of his back and guided him out of the park._

Vick found a little café down the street from the park and asked the waitress if they could have a booth in the back. She walked them back and gave them some menus and left them alone. Jiyong was still in a daze but Vick could tell that he had calmed down a bit as he sat down. The young man’s face was paler than normal but it was tinted red from just being out in the cold.

Jiyong picked up the menu from the table and flipped through it without really looking at. Vick watched as the younger man as he mindlessly went through the menu and after the third time of going through it, Vick reached out his hand to stop him.

“Jiyong look at me.” Vick waited until he looked up, “I know you have a lot going through your head right now and we can talk about it later. Right now lets just eat something.”

“But I’m not hungry,” Jiyong mumbled.

“I don’t care. You are going to sit here and eat with me because after today I’m not going to be able to see you for a few days. I want to have a good time with you right now and enjoy our time together. And if that means I have to force you to eat, then so be it.”

Jiyong saw in Vicks eyes that he wasn’t going to give in anytime soon, so he lowered his head, giving up and said, “Fine, but can we just get something to-go and head back to the studio. I just don’t feel like being out in public.”

“Sure,” said Vick as he called their waitress over, ordered something quick, and left the café making their way toward the studio.

Vick thought it would be best if he left Jiyong to think things through on the way, so they walked side by side in silence. After about a 15 minute walk they finally made it to the studio and without thinking Vick walked right up to the front. When he turned to wait for Jiyong to open the door, he saw him going around the side of the building. He was starting to think that Jiyong had lost his mind if he didn’t even know where his own studio was. But he decided to follow him anyway.

As he turned the corner of the building he saw a staircase leading to the second floor that Jiyong was making his way to the top too.

“Where are you going? I thought you said you wanted to go to the studio?”

Jiyong turned around and stared at Vick until it dawned on him, “Oh, sorry. Umm… up here is my place, when I said I wanted to go back to the studio, I meant my apartment.”

“Your apartment, I didn’t know you actually lived here.”

“If you don’t want to come up I understand.”

Vick gave Jiyong his best “are kidding me” face as he made his way up the staircase right behind Jiyong. The younger man sighed, not really wanting to deal with anything at the moment, and opened the door. As they made their way inside, Jiyong told Vick that he could go ahead into the living room and that he would meet him there in a minute.

Jiyong went into the kitchen to make them some tea and as he was doing so he tried to collect his thoughts. He knew he was going to have to explain things to Vick not only about things in general, but about how Jae is an ex-boyfriend of his and how obviously Vick now knows that he’s gay.

He wasn’t keeping it a secret from him, well maybe he was, because he’s falling for him and he didn’t want to mess things up. Over in America, when he started rising to fame he tried to keep his preference to himself, but in Hollywood nothing ever stays a secret. However when he came back to Korea, its more frowned upon so he kept it hush-hush. Only a handful of people knew and he wanted to keep it that way. But the cat was out of the bag and it was time to face the music. He set the kettle on the stove, turned it on and then dragged his feet as he made his way to the living room.

Vick had taken their food out of the to-go bag, spread it all out on the coffee table and sat on the floor waiting for Jiyong. When he finally came in Vick could see how stressed out he was, really it looked like he would get sick any second. Jiyong looked at Vick and was about to say something but Vick spoke first, “Sit. Eat.”

Not wanting to argue, Jiyong sat as far away as possible from Vick and started picking at his food. They sat there in silence for what seemed like forever just eating. The kettle whistled and Jiyong was glad for the small distraction, so he got up and brought their tea over.

It was starting to bug Jiyong that Vick wasn’t saying anything or asking any questions about what had happened. When he had picked away half of his food he finally looked up at Vick and asked, “Why aren’t you talking to me? Is it because of what happened? Are you just here because you feel bad for me?”

“You’re rambling again,” Vick said looking at his food and then raised his head as he continued, “I thought I would leave you be because you would talk when you’re ready. And no, I am not here because I feel bad for you.”

“Then why?”

“You are my friend who just was in an emotional fight with someone from their past. I know how that feels and I want to be here for you.”

Jiyong internally winced at the word “friend”, but just took a deep breath and asked, “Well what do you want to know?”

Vick slightly chuckled at his phrasing, looked at Jiyong and saw pain spread across his face. So he quickly explained, “Sorry. It just feels like déjà vu, only our roles are reversed.”

Jiyong scrunched his eyebrows together, not understanding.

“The photo shoot? Our conversations? It started out with that phrase ‘What do you want to know’ except I was the one asking it.”

Realization swept across Jiyong’s face and he relaxed a bit, glad to know that Vick wasn’t laughing at him. Vick continued to answer the original question, “If you don’t want to talk about it, its fine, I understand. But honestly I do hope you trust me enough to talk to me.”

Jiyong stared at Vick, looking at every feature of his face. From his sharp jaw line and his high cheek bones, to small imperfections like the scar below his left eyebrow, Jiyong was in love with every single detail. But his last place to look was Vicks’ eyes, and it was almost his undoing. When he looked into his eyes, Jiyong saw that Vick was pleading for his trust. He could see so many different emotions in the older man’s eyes and all he wanted to do was break down right there and tell him everything. He dropped his head, sat there for a minute and collected his thoughts.

When he was ready, he took a deep breath and raised his head to look at Vick again. His heart started racing, his hands become sweaty, but he finally whispered, “Ok.”

Vick leaned against the couch and sat as still as he could, listening to Jiyong explain.

“First off, which you probably guessed from what was said at the park, I’m gay.” Jiyong watched for a reaction from Vick but when he didn’t see one, he continued, “That guy from the park was an ex of mine from when I first came back to Korea. He was at a function for one of the designers I photographed for, and well, one thing led to another and we started seeing each other. After a few weeks I realized that we had nothing in common and we started growing apart because of it. He was a really nice guy but there just wasn’t a connection so I decided to put a stop to it before things could get complicated.”

Jiyong paused, looked down at his hands and started playing with watch band. He took a deep breath and continued, “After we split, he would call and text me off and on wanting to try again, but I was busy with work so I kept on telling him no. Sometimes he would stop by the studio wanting to talk, but again I would tell him no and to stop coming to see me. I found it weird that he was doing these things because when were together he was never clingy or anything. Eventually he stopped, but then one day we bumped into each other by chance about 2 months ago and he started it up again. But I guess he was more desperate to get back together because as you saw he followed me to the park.”

When Jiyong finished, he looked to Vick again and saw that he was not showing any kind of emotion still. “Well… that’s about it really.”

“Ok,” Vick said still just sitting there.

“Ok? Is that all you’re going to say?”

“Well what do you want me to say? You just had a fight with your ex. We’ve all been there before. Granted it did get a little too heated in my opinion when he tried to take a swing at you. I’m just glad I was there to stop him.”

Jiyong dropped his shoulders and felt some of the tension release from his body. He had gotten himself so worked up in anticipation of Vicks reaction.

“So you don’t care that I’m gay, or really, that I didn’t tell you I’m gay?”

“No, why would I? First off I already knew you were and I thought that if you wanted to tell me personally, eventually you would.”

Jiyong shot up, “You knew! How did you know?”

Vick chuckled at Jiyong's reaction and said, “Well after the photo shoot, when I went to Japan I wanted to find out more about you so I umm…,” Vick was a little embarrassed that he was saying this to Jiyong, he laughed at himself and said, “I googled you.”

Jiyong started laughing and Vick joined in. They sat there for a few minutes just laughing, glad for the sudden break from this morning’s tension. Once they regain their composure Vick continued, “Yeah I looked you up on google, read some news articles and what not. In one of the articles it talked about what kind of person you found attractive or something and you started describing a guy.”

Jiyong thought back and remembered the article he was talking about, but he couldn’t remember what kind of guy he described. Then he asked again just wanting to make 100% sure, “So you don’t care?”

“No Jiyong, I don’t care. We’re friends, very close friends and nothing is going to change that.”

Jiyong could feel his heart tighten inside his chest at Vicks words. He was thankful for Vick acceptance of him, but it was painful to hear Vick say that they would only be friends. He would always hold onto the hope that someday it would change.

“You know I actually have something I want to tell you…” Vick said after a minute.

Jiyong's heart started racing as he waited for Vick to continue, but just as Vick was about to speak again Jiyong's phone started ringing. Both of them jumped at the sudden sound and Jiyong scrambled to turn it off but when he looked to see who was calling, he saw what time it was and answered it.

“Where are you?” Seungri yelled on the other end. “The meeting starts in an hour and we still need to go over some things for the proposal.”

“I know. I know. I just saw the time. Some things happened this morning and I’ve been with Vick talking about it and time slipped away from me. I’ll be there in half an hour.” Jiyong hung up and looked at Vick.

“What were you going to say?”

“Huh?” Vick forgot for a second but he thought that the time wasn’t right so he said, “Oh yeah, never mind. It’s nothing really, we can talk about it later. You have to go.”

Jiyong gazed at him looking for some hint as to what he was going to say but then looked at the phone in his hand. The meeting was supposed to last only a couple hours at most and Vick was leaving the next day for some fan event in the south, so he thought what the heck, I’ll just ask.

“Do you want to come back over tonight? I know you’re leaving tomorrow but I was thinking we should just chill and maybe order some pizza and watch a movie.”

Vick smiled and said, “Yeah that actually sounds really good. I haven’t done that in a couple years.”

Jiyong wanted to jump up and down when he heard Vicks answer but all he said was, “Ok great.”

Vick and Jiyong got up and made their way towards the door to say their goodbyes.

“Listen, I just want you to know how much it meant to me that you talked to me today. Don’t think anymore about Jae, forget about him and move on with your life.”

“I’ll will. Thanks for listening and being here for me. Despite what happened I’m glad it did. Hopefully now I won’t have to deal with him anymore…”

“If he does call you, tell me okay?”

“Ok.”

“Well I better get going or you’ll be late for your meeting.”

“Yeah, umm I’ll see you tonight. How’s 8 o’clock?”

“Sounds good.”

Jiyong looked at Vick and they smiled at each other. And just as Vick was about to leave he brought his hand up and ruffled Jiyong's hair as he said, “See ya later.” And then he walked down the stairs leaving Jiyong motionless in the doorway.

Jiyong whispered to himself, “Damn him.”

Just when he got over a rollercoaster of emotions, he goes and does that again. And this time he did it when he was leaving, just like Seunghyun used to do. He shook his head to get rid of the thoughts and went back inside to grab his stuff for the meeting.

On his way there all he could think of was how much he wanted it to be 8 o’clock already.


	14. Chapter 14

For the rest of the day Jiyong scrambled about with thoughts of what the night could hold. And when 7 o’clock came around he was running around his house trying to clean every last corner. He pulled out a few movies that he had and placed them on the coffee table. Once he was done with everything he could think of, he sat on the couch and waited for Vick to arrive. His heart was beating out of his chest due to nerves and when he finally heard the doorbell ring, he jumped about three feet in the air.

He opened the door to find Vick holding a six pack of beer as he said, “Hope you don’t mind, I’ve always enjoyed beer when eating pizza.”

“No, that actually sounds good. Come on in.”

They walked to the living room and Vick set the beer down next to the movies. Vick picked them up and started going through them as Jiyong asked what kind of pizza they should order. Vick said he didn’t care as long as he could eat, he was starving. Jiyong nodded and said, “Ok, well I like Hawaiian so I’ll get that and just a pepperoni, okay?”

Vick chuckled and mumbled under his breath, “He still like the same pizza…”

“What was that?”

“I said that sounds good.”

Jiyong looked at Vick, knowing that that wasn’t what he really had said, but he shrugged it off and ordered anyway.

While they waited for the pizza to arrive they debated on what movie to watch for the night. They kept going back and forth on a handful of movies and finally decided on an action movie they both hadn’t seen in a while.

They opened some beers and talked about how the rest of their day went. Vick went through some last minute things for the fan event tomorrow. Jiyong talked about how the meeting went.

“Seungri was so pissed at me for being late. You should have seen his face.”

“Sorry for making you late.”

“No it’s fine. I told him what happened. He understood.”

They sat in silence for a minute until the doorbell rang signaling the pizza had arrived. Jiyong went to go pay as Vick set up the movie. Jiyong walked back into the living room and heard the trailers playing from the dvd as he set the pizza down. They grabbed their food and settled down on the couch next to each other ready to relax and enjoy their time together.

 

The movie was about halfway through when Vick felt a slight weight on his shoulder. Already knowing what it probably was, he looked down to find Jiyong asleep on his shoulder. Vick smiled and thought how much Jiyong must be tired if he can fall asleep at a time like this. He tried not to move around too much as he settled into the couch so Jiyong could keep on sleeping.

He was surprised that the younger man slept through the entire rest of the movie, but he didn’t mind as long as he got to spend time with him. Trying not to wake him, Vick reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone to check the time. It was getting close to 11:30 and he had to be up early the next morning, but when he looked to the sleeping man on his shoulder he thought he could stay for a couple more minutes.

Carefully he reached for Jiyong's head and brought it down into his lap, trying to make him more comfortable as he slept. Jiyong jostled around for a second and Vick thought he had woken him, but he nestled into his new position and continued to sleep.

Vick took this rare opportunity to carefully study every little detail of the younger man’s face. He couldn’t put into words how much this man had changed him in these last few weeks. All their time together had meant the world to Vick and what made him happier was that he had finally found someone who liked him for him. Someone who was able to put up with his bipolar-like personality changes and was there to listen when he needed to talk.

As he took in every feature of Jiyong, he absentmindedly started to trace the contours of the sleeping man’s face. His fingers ghosted over his cheekbones and eyes. Vicks heart started racing at the thought of what it would feel like to have those eyes look at him at this moment. His fingers moved over to trace his nose and then down to his lips. He stopped himself before he could even think of anything relating to the younger man's lips and what they would feel like.

Vick chuckled and said to himself, “You have no idea… the things you do to me.”

He brushed some of the younger man’s hair out of his closed eyes and then started combing his fingers through it while he talked to him.

“I wish I had the courage to tell you this while you’re awake…but remember when we first met at the shoot and you asked me what real name was…” He took a deep breath and thought it was still hard to say it even now while Jiyong slept. “My name is Seunghyun… Choi Seunghyun.”

He let the confession hang in the air for a minute. It was the first time he had said his real name in a very long time and it felt strange to have said it while no one was listening. He sighed and continued talking, “And you might not remember, but I’m almost positive, we were childhood friends. When I was in middle school…I met this boy. He would always sit under a tree and draw… He wouldn’t talk to anyone… except for one day when I went up to him. Some other kids were bullying him and I stopped them and… we just became friends.”

Vick let out a sigh as he thought back to all the times he and Jiyong had spent together as children. It was the brightest time of his life. Because after Jiyong had left, his life went spiraling down.

“I know you didn’t have a choice when you left suddenly, all those years ago, but I’m glad you came back. It’s amazing… the career you’ve created for yourself. I knew back then that you would have some sort of job involving art. The only thing I didn’t count on… was what kind of person I turned into. I hate how I’ve become rude and arrogant and a person not many people like. But I guess that’s just how I dealt with the sudden fame. People would always ask personal questions and after the hundredth time, I would snap. I found out that if I acted more cold to people they would be less likely to ask questions or talk to me, so I just kept on acting like that.”

Vick looked down to make sure Jiyong was still sleeping, which he was, and continued, “But then when we had the photo shoot and you and I talked… You listened. You didn’t judge me, you cared… you genuinely cared about how I felt. I hadn’t experienced that in so long… guess that’s why I wanted to become friends with you. But then when I left for Japan, I had this dream about my childhood and… and… I realized it was you. I don’t really remember how I put it together actually… but I know it’s you. You’re my Jiyong, my best friend Jiyong, from all those years ago.”

He kept combing through Jiyong's soft hair as he went on, “And when I realized who you were, I thought about who I had become and what a disappointment I would be if you ever found out. That’s why I haven’t said anything. I don’t want to see disappointment in your eyes when you look at me. If I ever saw that… I wouldn’t know what to do. That’s why I decided to change. I want to become a better person for you. So when the day comes and I can tell you who I am…” He took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he finished, “And how I feel about you…”

Again he let the words hang in the air, with the sound of his racing heart joining them.

“I hope the day will come soon… when you can accept all of me.”

Vick let Jiyong sleep in his lap for a few more minutes until he looked at his phone again and saw that it was midnight. He took in Jiyong’s peaceful face one last time and then gently shook the younger man’s shoulders to wake him up.

Jiyong groaned at the sudden onslaught of movement, but when he heard a deep voice whisper, “Jiyong, I have to leave now.” His eyes shot opened and he scrambled to sit up.

“Oh my god! I am so sorry! How much of the movie did I miss? What time is it?”

Vick chuckled, “Rambling… You fell asleep about halfway through and its midnight right now.”

Jiyong grabbed his phone just to make sure he had heard right and said, “Why didn’t you wake me up earlier. You have to be somewhere in the morning.”

“Its fine. You looked so exhausted that I didn’t have the heart to wake you. But now I really do need to head home.”

“Oh okay… sorry that this wasn’t much of a movie night.”

“Don’t worry about it. We can try to have a better one next time.”

Jiyong’s heart skipped a beat at the thought of having Vick over again.

“Ok… next time…” Jiyong brought up his hand to cover his mouth as he yawned.

Vick laughed and said, “Well I better get going so you can go back to sleep. I’ll call you when I get back into town.”

Jiyong nodded and both made their way to the door.

“Have a good time. Don’t get into too much trouble.”

“I’ll try not to.” Vick smiled at Jiyong and just like he did this morning, he ruffled Jiyong's hair.

This time Jiyong spoke up and asked, “Why do you do that?”

Taken aback at the sudden question, Vick stopped and left his hand atop the younger man’s head and said, “Oh… umm… I don’t know.” Embarrassed, Vick quickly shoved his hand in his pocket.

“Ok well I’m gonna go now. See ya.” He waved goodbye and rushed down the stairs into the cold, dark night.

Once Vick turned the corner of the building, Jiyong walked back into the house and fell back down on the couch. Laying in the same position that he was just in a few moments ago, save for his missing human pillow.

He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath as he said to the empty room,

“Did you really think I could sleep with you by my side like that…Seunghyun?”

He brought his hand up to his hair and played with it just as the older man had done and drifted back to sleep thinking about Vick’s confession that he wasn’t supposed to hear.


	15. Chapter 15

While Vick was out of town over the next few days, Jiyong kept replaying the conversation over and over in his head. For the first day or two after he found out, he kept on smiling at random times and Seungri would always look at him with a ‘what-the-hell-are-you-thinking-about’ face. He would just tell him mind his own business and then continue to let his mind wander.

As the week went on and he thought about it more, he came to the conclusion that he would wait for Vick to tell him face to face. He knew, after hearing what the older man had said, that he was nervous and scared. What Jiyong needed to figure out was how to make Vick see that he would support him no matter what, without giving it away that he knows who Vick really is.

But the one phrase that he just could not stop thinking about was ‘And how I feel about you’. He truly hoped that it meant what he thought it meant. But what kept him thinking otherwise was his experience with every other crush he had had in the past. He would always think one thing but the person would turn around and do something else. And honestly he didn’t know if he could just stand there and take the pain this time around.

With this in mind he made the decision that he would try and guard himself around Vick and if anything were to happen, Vick would have to be the one to make the first move. And knowing his own personality, the key word was ‘try’. Because as soon as he see’s Vick again, he knows everything will go out the window.

 

After about five days Jiyong finally got the call he had been waiting for, Vick was back in town. They decided to meet and have dinner later that night since Jiyong had a meeting that afternoon. It was a small restaurant that Jiyong had been wanting to take Vick to for a while now, and when 7 o’clock came around, both were sitting and catching up while they waited for their food.

When Vick first showed up all Jiyong could think was “ _he’s Seunghyun, he’s Seunghyun_ ”, to the point that he almost blurted it out as Vick sat down. But he quickly recovered and tried to calm his mind so he wouldn’t slip up later.

Vick talked about the fan meeting and some of the crazy fans and Jiyong realized how comfortable they really were with each other. They could talk about anything and everything, they could joke around with each other, or sometimes they could sit and read and be perfectly content because they know the other is right there by their side.

After dinner they walked outside and as soon as they were out the door Vick asked, “So, what do you want to do now?”

“Oh umm… I thought you would want to go home and sleep since you’ve been gone for a few days.”

Vick laughed and said, “That’s all I did really was sleep this entire trip when I wasn’t meeting anyone. So I just want to do something, anything really.”

“O-ok, well my place, the studio is like 5 minutes away. Wanna stop by and have a drink?”

“Sure, sounds great.”

As they made their way over to Jiyong's place, all Vick could think was, _I haven’t seen you in 5 days. Do you think just having dinner with you was enough time together for me?_

 

Vick shut the door behind him and followed Jiyong into his apartment. He had just made it into the living room when several things happened very fast. First he heard a bang, then a mumble of curse words coming from the younger man, and then Jiyong collided with him as he hopped back from whatever had happened.

It was a good thing Vick had fast reflexes because as soon as he saw Jiyong coming towards him, he held out his arms to catch the falling man. What he did not account for as how close Jiyong actually was. Vick looked down to see that he had grabbed onto Jiyong's hips to steady him, and when he looked up, he was face to face with the younger man.

Time stood still as he felt Jiyong's breath brush across his face. Vick gripped Jiyong's hips a little tighter due to shock while the younger man started biting his lip in embarrassment.

Vick stopped breathing in that moment. He didn’t know what to do. Jiyong, the person who has been on his mind nonstop for the past couple months, was just millimeters away. Vick could see the varying shades in the younger man's eyes, the barely-there stubble on his chin, and he could smell Jiyong's intoxicating cologne. But what was about to be his breaking point was the redness that was slowly making its way up Jiyong's cheeks as he bit his lip harder.

It took all of Vicks willpower to not lean in closer and take the younger man's lips, tasting it himself. Instead he took a small breath and whispered, “Are you okay?”

Jiyong nodded slightly. Vick looked into his eyes for any clue as to what was going through his mind, but when he couldn’t find an answer he whispered again, “What happened?”

It took a second for Jiyong to find his voice and when he did he softly replied, “I umm…I uhh… stubbed my toe on the coffee table.”  

“Can you stand on it?”

“What?”

“Your toe, or rather you foot…. can you stand on it?”

“Yeah… why?”

“Because I’m going to let go of you now.”

“Oh o-ok,” replied Jiyong as he bit his lip once more.

Breathlessly Vick pleaded, “Would you please stop doing that?” And when Jiyong scrunched his eyebrows together, Vick realized he had actually said it out loud. He quickly separated from Jiyong, not wanting to do anything he would regret later, and tried to act like nothing had just happened. He cleared his throat and tried to look anywhere but Jiyong's eyes.

Jiyong's stomach dropped when Vick reacted like that. He was hurt that the older man wouldn’t look at him and so, to avoid further heartache, he went into the kitchen mumbling, “I’ll go get us something to drink.”

Vick slumped onto the couch with his head in his hands, frustrated at himself with what just happened. He was so turned on by Jiyong biting his lip that he wanted to, and almost did, kiss him. He sat up and leaned his head back over the top of the couch as he ran his hands over his face, replaying the scene in his head.

He stopped when he remembered that his hands had grabbed Jiyong's hips just moments ago and lifted them up to look at them. He cupped his hands imitating how he held onto him as he remembered the slight warmth that emanated from beneath Jiyong's shirt.

“I don’t know how much longer I can take this,” he said to himself.

 

Jiyong eventually came back into the living room carrying two beers, handing one to Vick as he sat on the opposite side of the couch. Both of them could feel the tension in air and so they sat there silently waiting for the other to speak first.

Jiyong finally spoke up and asked, “So… do you have any other big schedules coming up?”

“No not really. I wanted to have some down time since I’ve been busy almost nonstop for the year.”

“Oh… okay. That sounds like a good idea.”

Jiyong was getting really frustrated at how awkward they were being with each other. They tried to make more small talk for another few minutes until they were interrupted by Vicks phone. It always seemed to be a phone that interrupted their time together, but for once he was thankful for it.

“What do you want Daesung?”

“Where are you?”

“Right now? I’m at Jiyongs place.”

“Ok good I’m actually close to there. I’ll be there in a second.”

“What! Why?”

“I’ll tell you when I get there.”

Daesung hung up leaving Vick staring at his phone, wondering what just happened.

“Is everything okay?” Jiyong asked.

“I uhh… I have no idea. He said that he was coming over and just hung up.”

“Huh…”

A few minutes of more awkward silence passed by while they waited for Daesung to arrive. Vick kept on thinking about what could have possibly happened that would make Daesung come over here, but he came up with no explanation. He told Jiyong that he need to use the bathroom and escaped down the hallway knowing his manager would arrive any minute now.

 

Jiyong heard a knock at the door and answered it knowing it was Daesung. When he saw the man standing at the door he knew something was wrong. He stepped to the side and let him come in from the cold and asked, “Is everything okay?”

“Where’s Vick?”

“He just went to use the bathroom.”

They were walking into the living room when Vick entered as well.

“Vick come on, we need to go somewhere.” Daesung said as he moved toward Vick.

“What the hell man. I told you I would be out all night. What’s going on?”

Daesung sighed and looked from Vick to Jiyong and back to Vick.

“Look whatever it is, you can say it in front of Jiyong.”

Jiyong looked on at the two of them as Daesung moved closer to Vick and put both hands on his shoulders.

“Your father just called me.” Vicks eyes widened as he looked at him to explain further.

“He told me that your mother is in the hospital.”


	16. Chapter 16

_“Your father just called me.” Vicks eyes widened as he looked at him to explain further._

_“He told me that your mother is in the hospital.”_

As soon as Daesung finished his sentence Vick was out the door.

Daesung looked toward Jiyong with sad eyes and said, “I don’t know what has happened to his mother.”

Jiyong moved forward and was about to speak but Daesung cut him off, “I know what you mean to Vick, but as of now I can’t bring you with us to the hospital. But I beg you, if you love him- yes I’ve seen the way you look at him when you think no one is watching… please just be here for him. He needs you most in his life right now.”

Jiyong stood there stunned that Daesung knew his feelings for Vick, but he finally nodded agreeing with him. Daesung nodded back and said, “Ok well I have to go. I’ll try and get in touch with you if I can, to let you know what’s going on, but I can’t promise you anything.”

“I understand.”

Jiyong escorted Daesung out the door and shut it behind the retreating man. He leaned his head against the door and said a silent prayer for Vick and his mother.

 

 

 

Ring Ring Ring

Ring Ring Ring

Vick was waiting for Jiyong to answer his phone, but he didn’t know how long he could hold on. He was about to collapse any minute if the younger man didn’t answer his phone.

“Hello?”

Finally after what was only a couple seconds Jiyong picked up the phone. But Vick didn’t know what to say once he did.

“Hello? Vick? You there?”

He took a deep breath and tried to control his voice as much as possible as he said, “Hey, umm… I was wondering if I could come over.” His emotions almost escaped him so he paused to collect himself. The young man on the other end answered during the pause, “Sure, of course. Is everything okay?”

Vick took another deep breath and answered quickly, “I just need someone to talk to and really you’re the only person who I have. I’ll be over in 10 minutes, is that okay?”

“Yeah sure. I’ll leave the door unlocked so just come on up when you get here.”

“Ok.” Vick hung up and started walking faster. Truth be told he was already on his way over to Jiyong's apartment before he even called. He needed to see him and talk to him. Jiyong was the only person who he wanted to be around right now after what had just happened.

Out of habit, he knocked on the front door when he arrived. He heard a footsteps coming towards him and a voice saying, “I said it would be unlocked, so why don’t you-“

Jiyong opened the door and when he saw Vick, he whispered the rest of his sentence, “-come on in…”

 

When Vick locked eyes with Jiyong, it was his undoing. He let a couple tears fall as he staggered into the apartment only to crumble to the floor. Jiyong scrambled to catch him as he said, “Woah, Vick! What happened?” The older man’s shoulders started to tremble, so Jiyong kneeled down and put his arms around him.

They sat in his hallway for 15 minutes as Vick cried. Jiyong had never seen anyone cry like this before, let alone someone he cared deeply for. Every time Vick tried to catch his breath he would breakdown even more, breaking Jiyong's heart. When Jiyong heard him starting to quiet down, he grabbed Vicks hand and held it is his.

Vick squeezed the younger man’s hand thankful that he was by his side. He turned to look at the younger man wanting to say something, but words escaped him yet again. Jiyong stared at Vick noticing how puffy his eyes were, tear stains running down his face, and just so much pain. He brought his hand up to Vicks face to wipe away a stray tear and whispered, “How about we move to the couch. I’ll make us some tea, okay?”

The older man nodded as Jiyong helped him up and to the living room. Once he got Vick settled he went to make the tea, but as he was doing so his mind was full of so many things.

_What had happened? Was his mother okay? Did Daesung tell him to come here? How could he help Vick?_

While thinking those questions, all Jiyong could see was the face Vick had as he entered the apartment. His heart shattered in that moment, seeing his friend so distraught.

After getting to know Vick more, Jiyong was drawn to the older man, and vice versa. They had told each other everything, well at least Jiyong knew _he_ had told Vick everything about himself. They talked about friends, or lack thereof, and about past relationships. Jiyong told Vick about him being gay, and the struggles of dealing with that. He told him about his parents, his family problems, his childhood, and his awkward high school years. He told Vick about everything, but as of right now he didn’t know if Vick did the same. And by the looks of it, he hadn’t.

As he poured the tea, he realized why he was becoming so emotional over his friend. It wasn’t that he was sympathetic, or that he felt bad for his friend. No it was because he was feeling just as much pain as Vick, without even knowing what had taken place at the hospital. Just the fact that Vick was in any sort of pain or heartache made Jiyong feel it too.

It was because he was truly in love with Vick.

He didn’t have time to dwell on how long he felt this for his friend. He knew he liked Vick but it was only now that he realized that his crush had turned into love. But right now he couldn’t think of himself or his feelings. He had to go comfort Vick and be there for him, nothing more. So he grabbed to mugs and walked out to the living room.

 

Vick wiped his face with the back of his hands to get rid of the excess tears. Jiyong lowered a mug in front of his face and said thank you as he took it from him. He could feel the couch sink lower as Jiyong sat next to him with his own mug against his lips.

They sat there for a while, drinking the hot soothing tea. Not speaking. And that’s why Vick came to Jiyong's, because he knew the young man would not pressure him to speak. He loved that about him, letting him take his time, but now he was finally ready to explain.

Vick put his mug on the coffee table and turned toward Jiyong. His heart started pounding and he felt like he was going to be sick, but he took a deep breath and said, “So, you probably have a lot of questions.”

“Yes, but only if you want to talk about it.”

“I do. But I just don’t really know where to start.”

“It’s okay, take your time.”

Vick looked at Jiyong and for once, he didn’t get nervous by doing so. In fact when they locked eyes with one another, Vick saw something in the younger mans that gave him the strength to carry on.

“Ok well first you’re probably wondering about my mother’s health.” Jiyong nodded.

“She’s fine actually. It seems that she fainted because of low blood sugar. They’re keeping her overnight for observation but she should be released tomorrow.”

“Well that’s good, isn’t it?”

Vick lowered his eyes as he said, “Yes. Don’t get me wrong, I am so thankful that it was nothing more serious. It’s just… She…” Vick let out a frustrated groan and he ran his hands over his face. All the emotions he had felt moments ago were starting to surface again.

Jiyong reached out and put his hand on the older man’s knee just to remind him that he was there. Vick tried to compose himself as best as he could and then finally started explaining the real reason he had come over so late at night.

“Let me start from the beginning. Remember when we had the photo shoot and I told you about my parents’ divorce, my mother's’ remarriage and the trouble I had living with them.”Jiyong nodded.

“And remember how I told you that I ended up leaving to go live with my father.” Again Jiyong nodded.

“Well I can’t remember if I ever told you, this but I haven’t spoken to her in over 5 years. When I started getting more famous, she called me one day to tell me how she didn’t want to be burdened by me. People would come up to her, asking questions and what not. And finally she got so frustrated by the whole situation that she started denying that she even had a son. She already hated me for leaving to go live with my dad, but I guess over the years she just became a bitter woman.”

Vick let his voice trail off. Jiyong could see that there was so much pain behind his eyes, and as he looked more closely, Vick looked like he had gone back to his high school mid set. Sitting on the couch was not the 26 year old actor Jiyong had come to know. Instead he saw a 16 year old boy who was emotionally scarred because of his mother’s abandonment.

Vick took another deep breath and continued talking, “Tonight, when I went to go see her… do you want to know what she said to me?”

Jiyong saw tears forming in the corners of Vick’s eyes and he said, “She looked me straight in the eye and said, ‘What are you doing here? Only family is allowed to visit, and as far as I know, I have no family.’”

A tear fell from Vick’s face and he shook his head trying to clear his thoughts. “I should have known she would be like that. I should have known.” He let out another frustrated groan, stood up and started pacing back and forth, as he continued, “Why did I get my hopes up? You know I actually thought on the way to the hospital that for once something good could come out her being sick. I thought maybe… just maybe, that if she had a near death experience or something, she would forgive me. She would see how she did wrong by me.” Vick gave a small chuckle. “I honestly thought that when I walked into her room she would open her arms like she did when I was a kid. We would both apologize for our past mistakes, and we could finally become a family again. But no… she didn’t even want to fucking look at me! My own mother…” Vick choked the last phrase out as he sat back down next to Jiyong with his face in his hands.”

Jiyong scooted closer to him and started rubbing his back to soothe him. He honestly didn’t know what to say, but he thought it would be best to just let Vick know that he was here and he would stay by his side.

After a couple minutes Vick turned to Jiyong saying, “I umm… I actually have something else to tell you. After this whole ordeal with my mother, it made me realize that…” He paused because he thought his heart was about to beat out of his chest from nervousness. Vick cleared his throat and carried on, “If… you… were ever in an accident, and I never had the chance to say this to you… I would regret of for the rest of my life.”

Jiyong's heart started racing as he thought to himself, _Was this really it? Is Vick about to tell him who he really is?_

“Wh-what is it?” Jiyong stuttered.

“When I was younger, my family moved around a lot, as you might recall. I never was able to become close with anyone, never have any friends. But when I was in middle school, I had the chance to make one friend.” Vick reached over and placed Jiyong's hand in between his and stared at their joined hands.

Jiyong could tell that he was extremely nervous because he could feel Vicks hands, clammy and shaking.

“This friend I had, was like a brother to me. We did everything together, spent every moment we could together. But one day he disappeared. He and his family moved without telling anyone. He was everything to me back then. Now years later, we met again. And after spending time with him I realized that he still means everything to me. But I don’t know if he remembers who I am… Jiyong…I-I’m… my nam-”

Vick paused to build up his courage some, but Jiyong decided to speak up. He reached up with his other hand and brought Vicks chin up so he could look him in the eye as he spoke. And what he said took Vick off guard completely.

“Seunghyun…”Vicks eyes bugged out as Jiyong said his name. “Seunghyun, I know who you are.”

Vick sucked in his breath and stared at the younger man. His emotions were on overdrive at this point, with random thoughts popping up in his head. _Jiyong knew who he was. He knew, and he didn’t look disappointed at who he had become. He had become his best friends over these last few months and he accepted all of his faults. He was always there for him, just like he was now._

But the one thought that kept pushing its way to the front of his mind was that he was in love with the man before him. And now that they both knew who each other were, Vick decided it was time to lay everything out. He had one more thing he wanted to tell Jiyong.

Vick felt like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulder and he started to tear up again, but Jiyong was not going to let him. He grabbed the older man’s face with both hands and just looked into his eyes. Vick tried to shy away but he hardened his grip, keeping their eyes locked with one another’s. A stray tear fell from Vicks eyes and Jiyong’s thumb was right there to wipe it away.

Vicks was looking all over Jiyong's face for any sign of emotion, but he couldn’t find anything definitive. His heart was beating out of his chest, his hands were sweating like crazy, and his mind was clouded with thoughts of the man in front of him.

Finally he couldn’t take it anymore.

He sucked in his breath and moved his head closer to Jiyong, looking at his lips. Just before they touched, Vicks eyes flicked back up to Jiyongs. The young man’s eyes had widened and were filled with… anticipation?

Before he could lose his nerve, Vick closed the gap between them, pressing their lips together. Vick was waiting for Jiyong to resist him, but he felt no such thing. In fact he felt the young man press into the kiss more.

Their lips moved across one another’s, deepening as Vick brought his hand up to hold Jiyong's cheek. Jiyong scooted closer to Vick on the couch and moved his hand up to finger through Vicks hair. Vick, shocked at the sudden advancement of Jiyong, pulled away first. He rested his forehead against Jiyongs and all they could hear was the sound or each other panting.

Jiyong stomach dropped when Vick stopped the kiss. He removed his hands from the older man’s hair and started mumbling, “I...I’m... I’m sorry… I thought that-“

Before he could finish his sentence, Vicks lips were once again pressed against his. This kiss lasted shorter than the first, but as their lips parted Vick whispered, “Never apologize for kissing me.”

Jiyong bit his lip as they moved slightly farther apart to look at each other, both of them slightly flushed.

“And please for the love of God, stop biting your lip.” Vick said as a smile smiled spread across his face.

Jiyong turned a shade darker at Vicks words. His mind was spinning from the, not one, but two kisses that they had just shared. He was on cloud nine with his stomach doing flip after flip as they sat there reveling in the aftermath of what just took place.

After about a minute Vick turned to Jiyong and said, “Sorry if I took you off guard, but I have been wanting to do that for a long time now.”

Jiyong's eyes widened, “You mean kiss me? You’ve been wanting to kiss me?”

Vick laughed. “Yes you moron,” he said as he brought his hand up to ruffle Jiyong's hair, trying to break some tension. Jiyong gave a small awkward chuckle.

“But I… umm… I didn’t know…I didn’t think you… were…”

“Were what… That I was attracted to you?”

“Well yeah… I thought you were straight…”

“Only Daesung knows that I’m not.”

Vick let that hang in the air for a little bit, then Jiyong spoke up.

“So what does this mean?” He motioned between them, referring to the kiss.

“Well I understand if you don’t want to, because this is a lot to take in at the moment. But I was hoping… I don’t know… maybe we could starting seeing each other. But only if you wanted too.” Vick gave a little frustrated sigh and continued talking, “What am I saying, I just sort of told you I liked you. And that I want to start dating but I don’t even know if you feel the same way… I have no idea what I’m doing.”

Vick leaned back into the couch, covering his face with his hands from embarrassment. Jiyong laughed at the older man and he heard Vicks muffled voice say, “Great now you’re laughing at me.”

Jiyong leaned closer to him and slowly brought down Vicks’ hands away from his face as he whispered into his ear, “Rambling…”

Both men laughed and then Jiyong continued, “Now I know how you feel when I do it.”

Vick looked to Jiyong and all he could do was smile at him.

Jiyong's heart started beating faster as Vick looked at him and finally he got up the courage to give Vick his answer. He leaned in and softly brushed his lips against the older mans, trying to convey the love that he felt for him. He could feel Vick smiling under the kiss and as Jiyong pulled back, he asked, “So is that a yes?”

Jiyong chuckled, “Yes.”

 


	17. Chapter 17

The next couple weeks were filled with awkward giggles and shy glances as Jiyong and Vick got accustomed to each other, now that they had started a real relationship.

Every time Vick would see Jiyong, he felt like a little 12 year old schoolgirl, smiling from ear to ear, hanging on every word he said, never leaving his side, but honestly that’s just how much the younger man made him happy.

They didn’t go out too much, just in case Vick was recognized, they didn’t want to cause a scene. And they didn’t want to make their relationship public, for obvious reasons. But every now and then they would chance it and go out to eat or see a movie. Vick liked the cheesy typical dates, it made him feel like a normal person, and Jiyong didn’t care what they did as long as they got to see each other.

 

On one of their dinner dates, they went to a restaurant that was frequented by wealthier patrons. It was midweek, so the restaurant itself wasn’t that occupied with diners, Vick knew this and thought it would be a good chance for them to have nice dinner and not be bothered too much by onlookers.  

They were seated towards the back and as they looked over their menu’s the waiter brought over a bottle of wine Vick had picked out earlier. After he poured their glasses and took their orders, he walked away leaving the two men to enjoy their drinks.

Both of them eyed each other as they took small sips waiting for the other to talk. They had started doing this on one of their first “dates”, having staring contests with each other. Vick started doing it because it would make Jiyong squirm a little and Vick always loved it when the younger man became flustered. After a couple times, Jiyong got used to it and he would stare back trying to make the older man squirm for once.

Vick wanted to be stubborn this time, so he decided he would be tight lipped until the younger man spoke first. Jiyong knew what he was up to and wanted to play along, so the tension kept building. He set down his glass clasping his hands together in front of him and stared directly at Vick, challenging him. The older man smirked and took one last sip before he mimicked Jiyongs motions and stared back.

Jiyong squinted his eyes slightly and gave a small coy smile. He wanted to see how long they could last like this, because for him, he could sit and stare at Vick for days on end. As he looked into Vicks eyes he could see there was something there he had never seen before. A spark or hint of some kind of emotion, he just couldn’t place it.

It was almost… playful.

As Jiyong continued to stare at him, Vick slowly brought his tongue out to wet his lips, to see if he could get a reaction out of Jiyong.

And a reaction he got.

Jiyong tried not to show any, but he just couldn’t help himself. His eye’s slightly widened and Vick heard the gulp that the younger man took. As soon as he saw the small movement of Jiyong's throat, Vick’s eyes narrowed in on it. He watched as his adam’s apple slowly bobbed up and down. What he wouldn’t give to be sucking on that neck right now, he thought as he almost let out a small groan.

He had to remember that they were in a restaurant… but there was always after dinner.

Jiyong saw the small change in Vick’s expression, and he knew what that one was. And he decided to push him further. With a coy smile, he brought one hand up and rested his chin on it as he slowly started to bite his lip, all while never breaking eye contact.

As Vick saw this gesture from Jiyong, he knew that the gloves had come off and they were about to start playing dirty. After their night of confessions, the younger man discovered how much his small lip biting affected Vick, and he stored it in the back of his mind to use for later. And so naturally it was perfect timing to bring it out in the middle of a restaurant.

Vick fidgeted in his seat, crossing his legs, and Jiyong smirked satisfied with the older man’s reaction. But what he didn’t realize was that Vick had moved on purpose. He let Jiyong feel like he had won their little game for a minute, but then he moved his foot and started gently rubbing the younger man’s leg.

Jiyong jerked hitting the underside of the table with his knees and created a rather loud commotion. Vick couldn’t hold in his laughter and started chuckling at the blushing man in front of him. Jiyong glared at him and whispered under his breath, “That wasn’t funny.”

“Yes. Yes, actually it was.”

The younger man huffed as he leaned back in his seat crossing his arms in protest.

“Come on, don’t do that,” Vick said.

“Do what?”

“Pout.”

“I’m not pouting.”

“Yes you are. And you need to stop.”

“And why is that?”

“Because you look too adorable. And I don’t know if I can hold myself back while you’re making that face.”

Jiyong quickly glanced around the restaurant to see if anyone else had heard Vick’s comment. The older man chuckled. Jiyong reached out and batted at his arm to make him stop as he said, “Stop it. What if someone heard you?”

When the younger man reached over to hit him, Vick grabbed his hand and held it in his as he whispered, “No can hear us back here.”

Still wary of possible onlookers, Jiyong again looked around as he tried to pull his hand out of Vick’s, but the older man wouldn’t let him. He tightened his grip making Jiyong look at him.

“Would you calm down for a bit, no one is going to see us.”

“But-“

“Can’t I just hold my boyfriends hand at dinner?” Vick asked as he started rubbing the back of Jiyong's hand with his thumb and he could see that the motion was calming the younger man.

They sat there for a few minutes just appreciating one another until Vick saw that there food was coming and pulled his hand away. Jiyong frowned as the warmth left his hand but welcomed the food.

 

Halfway through, Jiyong looked up and stifled a laugh as he watched Vick. The older man heard the strange noise and scrunched his eyebrows, silently questioning the younger man as to what he was laughing at.

Jiyong swiped his finger on the corner of his own mouth trying to tell Vick he had pasta sauce on his cheek. The older man wiped his right cheek but Jiyong shook his head and pointed to the left side. He wiped the other side and looked to the younger man to see if he had gotten it.

Jiyong chuckled and shook his head as he leaned forward to wipe away the sauce. Just before his hand brushed over Vick’s cheek, the older man moved his head and bit down playfully on Jiyong’s thumb as he raised an eyebrow.

Jiyong gasped and squinted his eyes. Vick wiggled his eyebrows as if to ask ‘what are you gonna do about it’. The younger man pulled his thumb out, rubbed the sauce off Vick’s cheek and then brought it up to his lips.

Vicks eyes widened as he watched Jiyong slowly put his thumb between his lips and suck the sauce off. He heard a small popping sound as Jiyong pulled his thumb out, giving Vick an evil smile.

“That’s for the leg stunt you pulled earlier. Now are you going to leave your mouth hanging open like that or are you going to finish eating?”

Vick shut his mouth as soon as Jiyong said it was open and took in a deep frustrated breath. He glared at the younger man and continued eating, praying that they would finish soon and get out of here.

 


	18. Chapter 18

After teasing each other a couple more times they finally finished dinner. The waiter came up after clearing their plates and asked if they would like any dessert. Vick spoke up, politely declined and then took the check. He looked at Jiyong as he took out his credit card to pay for the bill and handed it back to the waiter, he could tell that the younger man was a little bummed at not finishing the night with something sweet.

“Hey, I said no to dessert _here_. It doesn’t mean that we’re not going to have any elsewhere.”

A small smile spread across the younger man’s face.

“Where are we going?”

“Some place that I’ve wanted to take you to for a while. But that’s all I’m going to say.”

Jiyong pouted his lips slightly wanting to know more but decided not to press the issue, he always did like surprises.

 

They left the restaurant and started walking towards the main drag of the city. Even though it was midweek, the city was still bustling as ever. Jiyong always liked crowded cities, there were just so many things to see and there was never a dull moment. The shopping was fantastic and street food was to die for.

As for Vick, he loved this time of year. It was the perfect time for a celebrity to roam the streets without being recognized. Everyone was equally wrapped in jackets, scarves and hats trying to keep warm as they moved about. He himself had a scarf wrapped around, not only his neck, but also covering his mouth to hide his face better. Jiyong walked next to him wearing his favorite beanie that made his bangs stick out. Vick loved it when he wore it, he’s always had a thing for guys in beanies.

As they made their way down the crowded street towards Vicks’ secret location, Jiyong kept getting knocked into by others and started falling behind. He was grateful for the older man’s height because he could see him standing above the crowd and tried to make his way towards him, but he just couldn’t catch up. Vick wasn’t paying much attention and Jiyong didn’t want to call out his name because they were in fact in the middle of the city, and if he called out “Vick” people would probably start going crazy. He saw him getting further away so he decided to call out something else.

“Seunghyun!”

He didn’t stop or turn around. Jiyong thought that maybe he wasn’t loud enough so he tried again.

“Seunghyun! Wait up! SEUNGHYUN!”

All he could see was the older man’s hat stop in the middle of the crowd a few yards ahead of him.

 

Vick was walking towards their destination with so many things going through his head that he hadn’t realized Jiyong wasn’t by his side until he heard his name. His real name. At first he thought he was hearing things but when he heard the desperate tone coming from an all too familiar voice, he stopped. Looking on either side of him and not seeing Jiyong, his stomach dropped.

He spun around so fast that he knocked into someone but quickly apologized as he tried looking for his boyfriend. It was dark, crowded, and people were moving so fast that he started to panic. Jiyong wasn’t anywhere near him. He frantically started moving back the way he came trying to find him. He was looking every which way and still nothing, but then he saw a small tuft of blonde hair poking out of beanie and started walking towards it.

As soon as they made eye contact Jiyong smiled, glad that he had found him. Vick came right up to him and without saying a word, grabbed the younger man’s hand, laced their fingers together, stuffed them into his jacket pocket, and pulled Jiyong down the street.

He tried to say something to the older man but Vick just squeezed his hand and said, “Don’t worry, I’ve got you.”

Jiyong didn’t know what was happening for a minute as he got used to the fact that they were walking hand in hand, _in the middle of the city_. It was too crowded for anyone to see what they were doing, and it probably looked like two friends trying to stay together in the confusion. But Jiyong could not stop smiling as he kept stealing glances at Vick as they walked.

They walked in silence for the rest of the way, turning down a couple of side streets here and there, and finally they had arrived in front of a tall building. Jiyong dug his feet into the ground jerking Vick to stop as he asked, “Where are we? I thought we were going to get dessert.”

Vick chuckled at Jiyong’s hesitation, squeezed his hand again and replied, “Will just trust me?”

The younger man looked between the looming building and Vick and eyed him as he wondered what he was up too. Amused at his expression, Vick quickly glanced around to see if anyone was nearby and when he saw no one, he leaned over and kissed him on the forehead. Jiyong sucked in a breath and then felt Vick pulling him towards the building.

 

Vick kept their hands joined inside his jacket pocket for the entire ride up the elevator. He could feel Jiyong rocking back and forth on his heels in anticipation, and when he chanced a glance at him, he was already staring back. They smiled at each other and color started rising in Jiyong’s cheeks. Vick leaned down, and this time kissed him on the lips. It didn’t last nearly as long as he wanted because the elevator stopped, and as the doors opened up Jiyong could see a long hallway with doors spaced out evenly.

Vick pulled him off before the doors shut and they walked about half way down until they stopped in front of one. He finally unlatched his hand from Jiyong and pulled out a set of keys from his pants pocket.

Jiyong had a feeling while riding up the elevator where Vick was taking him but it wasn’t confirmed until Vick opened the door, leading the way inside and said, “Welcome to my humble abode.”

 

After the giving the grand tour, Vick explained that he picked up ice cream earlier this afternoon and that he wanted to bring the younger man over and enjoy it with him. He led the way into the kitchen, with Jiyong close behind him. He opened the freezer, grabbed the tub of ice cream, then grabbed a spoon, hopped up on to the counter and started digging in.

The younger man stared at him as he ate the ice cream and said, “Are you gonna save any for me?”

Vick swallowed the spoonful that was in his mouth before gave a coy smile and said, “Well come over here.” He waved the spoon at him.

Jiyong warily made his way over to him, not knowing what the older man was up too.

“Closer, I’m not going to bite.”

“Yeah? That’s what you said the other day and-“

“Oh just come here.” Vick said, cutting him off as he scooped a spoonful and held it out toward the younger man.

Jiyong stepped closer, almost in between the older man’s legs, and went to take the spoon from him but Vick said, “Just open up.”

He rolled his eyes and decided to play a little. He placed his hands on Vick's thighs as stepped fully in between his legs, leaned down and opened his mouth, waiting for the ice cream.

Vick gasped at the sudden close proximity of his boyfriend and Jiyong raised an eyebrow, smirking at his reaction. He opened his mouth again and this time Vick placed it the spoon inside, making Jiyong close his eyes and mouth.

It was mint chocolate chip ice cream, their favorite. Something they found out early on in their friendship, but they never had a chance to have some together as adults, until now. Jiyong let out a small moan as the sweet creamy flavor slid down his throat, and as soon as he realized he did it, his eyes popped open.

Heat rushed to cheeks as he saw Vick staring at him with his mouth slightly ajar. With the spoon hanging in the older man’s hand, Jiyong straightened up and tried to take a step back but his boyfriend was too fast. Throwing the spoon and ice cream onto the counter, Vick grabbed Jiyong’s waist and pulled him into a kiss.

Their lips crashed against each other as Jiyong reacted on instinct and brought his hands up to cup the older man’s cheeks. Vick brushed his tongue against the younger man’s lips, begging for entrance. Feeling the slick warmth, Jiyong obliged and opened his mouth, letting his boyfriend explore him more.

Vick groaned and scooted closer to the edge, trying to press their bodies as close to each other as he could. Jiyong moved his fingers up into Vick’s hair and tugged a little, wanting to hear another knee shaking moan. When he heard it, a slight shiver ran up his spine and he bit down on the older man’s bottom lip. Vick sucked in a breath a pulled away for a second, not wanting to get ahead of himself too much and rested his head on Jiyong’s shoulder as he mumbled, slightly out of breath, “As much… as I…would love to… continue this, I think it’s too soon for us.”

Jiyong wrapped his arms around his boyfriend and nuzzled into his neck. He gave him a soft kiss and whispered back, “I know. I think so too. But you have no idea how much it means to me, you know… for wanting to take our time.”

Vick moved his head up and placed a kiss on Jiyong’s neck as well, and then pulled away to face his boyfriend. He brought his hand up and rubbed his thumb along the younger man's cheek bone as he said, “I do want to take our time, but honestly I hope it’s not too much longer. I don’t want to rush into anything you don’t want, but I-“

Jiyong stopped him with a kiss and Vick welcomed it, their lips gliding across one another. After a few moments Jiyong pulled away and softly said, “You aren’t rushing me. Maybe not tonight or next week, but soon. I promise.” He leaned back in and brushed his lips against Vicks for a brief kiss. The older man then leaned his forehead up against his and wrapped his arms around his waist, resting his hand in the small of his back. They smiled at each other, taking in the moment, until the silence was broken again by Jiyong.

The younger man pulled back and started biting his lip as he stuttered, “Umm… I ne-need to t-tell you something.”

Vick scrunched his eyebrows wondering what was bothering him. And with Jiyong being his usual flustered self, he sped through what was on his mind.

“It’s getting close to fashion week over in New York, and a couple of my designer friends have invited me over to take pictures and whatnot. So I guess this is me telling you that I’m gonna have to be out of the country for almost two weeks.”

Vick’s heart fell as he heard his boyfriend tell him this. His shoulders slumped and he looked down. They had only started this relationship a few weeks ago, but since then they had not gone a day without seeing each other. Now he would have to spend two weeks without him?

Noticing Vick’s silence and mood change, Jiyong tried to give him some better news that would hopefully cheer him up. He used his knuckle to bring the older man’s chin up so he could look at him, but he avoided his gaze.

“Hey look at me. Please?” Reluctantly Vick brought his eyes up to meet Jiyong’s.

“I know. I don’t really want to leave either, but they are my friends asking me for a favor. We’ll have our phones and I expect you to call me every day.”

Vick smiled slightly.

“But the real thing I wanted to say was this; when I come back, I have to go to Jeju Island for a special shoot with a designer who wants to start his pictorial for his summer collection. And I wanted to know if you would like to come with me?”

“What?” Vick blurted out without thinking.

“I want you to come with me… to Jeju Island. It’s going to be a weekend photo shoot and I thought we could turn it into a long weekend and spend some time together.”

Stunned into silence, Vick took a little too long for Jiyong and so he continued to stammer, “Ok I understand… You probably think it’s too soon… and you might be right. I don’t know what I was think-“

Vick moved his hands up to hold Jiyong’s face as he said, “I would love to spend the weekend with you.” He moved in and gently kissed him trying to convey his sincerity. They pulled away and Jiyong was smiling from ear to ear as he asked, “Really? You really want to?”

“Of course. Who wouldn’t want to be on a beautiful island with his boyfriend, lounging in the sun during the day…” He pulled Jiyong closer to him and whispered in his ear, “And spending the nights lock away in a hotel room…”

Jiyong lightly nudged Vicks shoulder embarrassed at his forwardness. Vick grazed his lips across the younger man’s cheek and then pulled back to look him in the eyes. Smiling again, the younger man said, “Ok then. It’s a date.”

He looked to side and stifled a laugh as he said, “Umm I think all the ice cream’s melted.”

Vick looked down at the container of now soupy dessert and then looked back at his boyfriend. They busted out laughing as Jiyong moved to put it away and Vick hopped down from counter.

After Jiyong shut the freezer door he picked up the spoon and walked it to the sink, dropping it in. The older man walked up behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist. Jiyong leaned into him and said, “I had a great night tonight.”

“Me too,” Vick replied as he kissed his neck again and then whispered, “If I promise to be on my best behavior, would you want to spend the night? It’s getting pretty late you know.”

Jiyong looked at the clock on the microwave and saw that is was close to midnight. Where had the time gone?

He turned around inside his boyfriends arms to face him and said, “Well… I don’t have any plans tomorrow…”

Vick raised an eyebrow, “So…”

“Only if you are a perfect gentleman, I guess I can stay the night.”

Vick leaned in and kissed Jiyong on the tip of his nose and said, “Scouts honor.”


	19. Chapter 19

Jiyong squirmed out of Vicks’ arms saying he had to use the bathroom, to which the older man pointed down the hallway and said, “Second door on your left.” Jiyong nodded and walked in the direction he pointed in.  
When Jiyong was out of his sight, Vick just stood in the kitchen reveling in the high he was experiencing from everything that had just happened. He couldn’t stop smiling and his stomach was doing flips at the thought of what a weekend in Jeju could hold. But his heart stopped when he thought about having to live two weeks without seeing the younger man. It would be hell, but he would have to suck it up and get through it. They had their phones and Jiyong would probably bring his computer, so they could video chat when he had time.  
He was brought out of his thoughts by the sound of the bathroom door opening as Jiyong walked back towards him.  
“So I know we just agreed on me staying the night and everything…”  
Vick’s heart sunk and he held his breath waiting for some form of rejection that he was sure was coming.  
“But… umm… what am I going to wear? Would you mind if maybe… I… uhh… borrowed something?”  
Vick couldn’t help but burst out laughing from the nervousness he had created in his head and at the embarrassed face his boyfriend was making.  
Jiyong huffed and crossed his arms, not appreciating Vick’s reaction.  
“What are you laughing at me for? It’s a legitimate question. I don’t know about you but I find it rather uncomfortable to sleep in skinny jeans and a sweater.”  
“Sorry… sorry…” Vick panted out as he tried to compose himself. He started moving towards Jiyong as he continued, “Yeah, I’ve got something. Follow me.”  
As they walked to Vick’s bedroom to get Jiyong his change of clothes for the night, the younger man kept looking around the apartment, taking every detail in. For everything that was here, was a part of the life Vick has lead since they’ve been separated as kids. From the books randomly scattered about, to the little knick knacks and toys that decorated the apartment, everything meant something to the older man. And Jiyong hoped he would be able to find out one day.  
When they walked in, he stayed at the door and leaned against the frame, waiting. Vick walked around the bed to his dresser and pulled out a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt, tossing them towards Jiyong.  
“Here. They’re an old pair that doesn’t fit me anymore, maybe they’ll fit you. Also there’s a spare toothbrush in the bathroom drawer on the left.”  
“You had this planned, didn’t you?” Jiyong asked, eyeing him.  
“One always has hopes.”  
Jiyong rolled his eyes and grabbed the clothes, making his way back to the bathroom to get ready for the night.

After going through the awkward part of arguing about who was sleeping where, they finally agreed to share Vicks’ bed, not wanting to make the other uncomfortable by sleeping on the couch.  
Vick made sure to reiterate the promise he made earlier about being a gentleman, trying to relieve any hesitations the younger man might have, as they climbed under the covers.  
With both men lying on their backs, staring at the ceiling , they tried to fall asleep. But the feeling of the others presence next to them, and millions of things running through their heads, they found sleep was not coming as fast as they had expected.  
Vick finally rolled over to face the other man and whispered into the darkness, “Are you awake?”  
He heard the rumpling of sheets as he felt the younger man rolling onto his side as well.  
“Yeah. Can’t sleep.”  
“Same here.”  
They could barely make out each other’s features in the darkness but it was just comforting to know that the other was there.  
“You know I was thinking… about what you said earlier tonight, while we were on our way here…”  
“What did I say?”  
Vick took a moment.  
“My name… you called out my real name when we got separated.”  
“Sorry… I didn’t know what else to say.”  
“No, it’s not that I’m mad at you… it’s… umm how do I explain this? When I heard you call for me, it made my heart stop. Not in a bad way or anything, but I felt… I don’t know… normal. Like in that moment I wasn’t Vick the movie star, I was Seunghyun, a normal man who had been lost in a crowd… and I liked it.”  
“Oh…”  
“Yeah…”  
A short silence passed over them as the confession sunk in.  
Then Vick broke it by continuing with, “I was wondering… if you don’t mind… would you start calling me Seunghyun from now on?”  
Instead of hearing a reply from Jiyong, he felt the bed move and then the younger man’s arms wrap around him, pulling him into an embrace. The soft warmth of his breath ghosted over his cheek as he moved his head closer to whisper, “Seunghyun…”  
A shiver ran down his spine at hearing his name again. He moved and nestled into the crook of his boyfriends neck and smiled against the soft skin.  
Jiyong wrapped his arms around him more, trying to become as close as possible, and kissed the older man on the temple.  
“You will always be my Seunghyun.”  
Eventually sleep came and carried them off, still wrapped in each other’s arms.

The day Jiyong left for New York was absolute torture for Seunghyun. He wanted to spend the short amount of time being happy with him, but the fact that he was leaving kept pushing its way to the front of his mind. Jiyong knew what was bothering him but tried to make the best their time together.  
They agreed to have breakfast and then Seunghyun demanded that he drive him to the airport. He knew it was risky driving to the airport together since no one really knew about their friendship let alone their actual relationship, but he had to see Jiyong off.  
They pulled into the parking lot and parked in one of the more secluded areas, just to make sure they were alone. Seunghyun put the car into park, they unbuckled their seatbelts and just sat in the car not saying anything.  
Jiyong twisted in his seat a bit to look at the man sitting next time, trying to memorize every detail.  
Seunghyun could feel his gaze on him and decided to turn towards him. He could almost feel the crackle of tension in the air that was building between them. And as their eyes locked, he brought up his hand up, cupping his face and brushed his thumb across Jiyong’s cheek bone.  
The younger man leaned into the warm strong hand, closing his eyes for a second as he hummed, “I could stay like this forever.”  
“I wouldn’t complain.”  
“I know you wouldn’t, but my friends in New York would.”  
Jiyong looked at the clock wishing time could freeze for a few more moments, but he had to board the plan in less than 45 minutes.  
“I have to go.”  
“I know…”  
Finally, they couldn’t take the tension any more as both of them leaned towards each other at the same moment. Their lips locked in a sloppy, hasty kiss. Their hands roamed each other’s bodies.  
Jiyong brought his hands up and tugged at Seunghyun’s hair, making him gasp. He took the chance and pushed his tongue past the shocked man’s lips. Seunghyun welcomed the glorious intrusion and gave a small moan.  
Jiyong loved hearing the moan and feeling the vibrations on his lips from it. He slide hands down the older man’s neck trying to pull him closer. Not caring about anything at the moment, Seunghyun grabbed onto Jiyong’s hips and pulled him across the seat to sit in his lap.  
As awkward and uncomfortable as it was, the two men got accustomed to their new position rather fast, with Jiyong grinding his hips into the older man’s. They pulled apart for a brief second and looked into one another’s eyes, filled with passion and lust.  
Seunghyun nipped at Jiyong’s bottom lip which ignited the fire again in the younger man. He kissed his way across the older man’s jaw and down his neck. He heard a hiss from the man above him as he bit down on his soft, exposed skin.  
“Ji…” Seunghyun moaned at the onslaught of his neck.  
“Mmm… Ji… I like the sound of that,” he mumbled against the mark that was starting to form on the older man.  
Digging his nails into Jiyong’s waist, Seunghyun groaned. He had never seen this side of his boyfriend in all of the intense make out sessions they’ve had over the weeks. He would nibble here and there, nothing like this, but he wasn’t complaining.  
Seunghyun moved his hands up his stomach and slowly pulled the younger man from him. Jiyong let out a small moan from being separated from the hot skin and was left panting in his lap. The older man almost let him go back to assaulting his neck when he felt the warm breath brush across his face and saw the redness in Jiyong’s cheeks.  
“You know you have to go…”  
“Yeah… but I just wanted to give you something to remember me by.”  
Seunghyun rolled his eyes and pointed to the mark that was on his neck, “Like I need this to remind me. I’m going to be too preoccupied replaying what just happened in my head at night to sleep.”  
Jiyong flashed him an evil smile and started biting his lip.  
“Hey now, that’s not fair! You can’t start doing that again knowing you’re about to leave.”  
The younger man chuckled and leaned in to kiss him again. This kiss was soft and sweet, completely opposite as to what just took place. Finally Jiyong pulled away and slid back into the passenger seat to make his way out of the car. Seunghyun looked at him, longing to go back to his place and continue, but before the younger man opened the door, he pulled his shirt sleeves.  
“Jiyong, wait.” His boyfriend turned at being called.  
“You know I kind of like the sound of Ji…” He gave a coy smile that quickly faded at the older man’s expression. “What is it?”  
“I just… I…” His throat suddenly dried up, but he swallowed and reached for Jiyong’s hand, holding it in his. He looked at their joined hands and then looked to him.  
“I love you.”  
Jiyong’s eyes widened and Seunghyun leaned over for one last kiss. He didn’t give the younger man any chance to reply because as soon as they pulled apart he said, “Now go. You’re gonna miss your flight.” Pushing him out of the car.  
Flustered and at a loss for any form of speech, Jiyong got out of the car and grabbed his luggage from the back. Seunghyun yelled goodbye from the driver’s seat and sped off once the door had shut.  
Jiyong stood there for another minute taking in everything that had happened. His phone beeped, breaking him from his daze, and he pulled it out to read the new message.  
Get going! I know you’re still standing there!  
He looked around the parking lot for the familiar car, but couldn’t find it. And then another beep with a new message appeared.  
I meant what I said... Now go and hurry back so I can hear your reply.  
Jiyong smiled at the text as his stomach filled with butterflies. He couldn’t wait for this trip to be over.


	20. Chapter 20

Fashion Week passed in a daze. From the multiple runways to the dozens of after parties, there was never a dull moment for Jiyong. Despite how much he missed his boyfriend, he was happy to see some of his old friends and catch up them.

One friend in particular was especially happy to see the young man, so much so, that he was the one who picked him up from the airport when he first arrived, and whom Jiyong had spent almost every possible moment with while in New York.

If Seunghyun had Daesung as his closest friend, then Jiyong had Youngbae. Both became friends because they were newcomers in the industry at a young age. Youngbae was one of the first designers Jiyong had worked with and they just seemed to click.

As their time passed together in New York, Youngbae could tell there was something different about his old friend. He could see a change in him, a spring in his step, a glow in his face, and he couldn’t take not knowing what it was anymore.

After one of the smaller shows, the two agreed to grab some dinner and drinks, and eat at a small park, just the two of them. Youngbae knew that if he got the younger man intoxicated enough he would become an open book and confess anything. So with a greasy burger, fries, and a handful of beers in Jiyong's system, Youngbae started his interrogation.

“So, how’s Korea been?”

“It’s been going pretty well, business is good.” Jiyong took a sip of his already half empty beer. “Seungri says that I have a waiting list of people who want to work with me, but I won’t believe it till I see it. What about you? I saw that a pretty famous actress wore your dress on the red carpet.”

Youngbae chuckled. “Yeah, that’s as big as it’s gotten since you left, you know, other than being here at fashion week.”

“But didn’t you take a break? You took some time off to work on a couple collections, right?”

“Yeah, yeah, but who cares about what I did during my time off. I want to know what’s been going on with you. You seem so different since the last time we met, like almost another person.”

With the alcohol starting to take effect, all Jiyong could do was smile into his drink.

“Ah ha! See I knew there was something you weren’t telling me,” Youngbae said, pointing at the younger man with one of his french fries and then stuffing it in his face. “You know you can’t hide anything from me, so come on, spill it.”

Jiyong shook his head as he set down his drink and proceeded to take a bite of his burger, stalling as long as he could.

“Come on!”

“Notgunnatellyounething,” Jiyong mumbled with a mouth full of food. He grabbed for his beer to wash it down, but Youngbae was faster.

“Nope, not getting another drop until you tell me, did you meet someone?”

“Meybay,” he mumbled again reaching for the drink in the older man’s hand.

Youngbae it pulled back.

“Oh just give me the damn beer,” Jiyong yelled after he swallowed the food, snatching his beer, and guzzling it.

“What’s his name?”

It took Jiyong longer to answer than he thought it would, only for the fact that he didn’t know exactly what to tell Youngbae. With the alcohol starting to take over his mind, he wanted to shout to world that he was dating one of the hottest actors in Korea, but he still had some common sense tucked away.

“Umm, his name’s Seunghyun…”

“What does he do?”

Again another pause.

Youngbae scrunched eyebrows together knowing that the younger man was holding something back. He decided that Jiyong just didn’t have enough alcohol in him, so when he saw that he’d finish the one he was on, he pushed another can towards him.

“He’s kind of in the same field as us…”

Jiyong tipped his head back taking a big gulp trying to avoid the topic yet again. He kept drinking beers like they were water and he had been stranded in a desert for weeks. Youngbae knew that if he kept poking the subject Jiyong would eventually confess what he was keeping to himself.

“So… what? Is he a photographer, designer, model, makeup artist… or something else?”

“Something else…”

“Oh for gods sake Jiyong, Just tell me already!”

Looking at his friend’s frustrated expression Jiyong busted out in a fit of giggles, alcohol completely taking over him. Once he calmed down he told Youngbae about who Seunghyun really was and how they’d met.

While listening to his best friend talk, Youngbae could see how happy he truly was with his new life in Korea. A small weight was lifted off him after worrying about the younger man for the past year. He knew that his moving there was a big step in his life and he was grateful that he had adjusted, and even found someone that made him happy.

 

After finishing off the remaining beers and their dinner, Youngbae knew it was time to head back downtown. Also a big clue was for the fact that Jiyong could barely form complete sentences or properly stand up without any sort of help, from consuming almost all the beers they had bought. So he hailed a cab and took his friend back to his place where he was staying for his time in the city.

Jiyong was one of those giggly I-love-everyone drunks. For the entire ride back the apartment, he kept talking to the driver, from how much he appreciated him for driving them, to telling him how much he loved having Youngbae for a best friend and how he missed him, to trying to roll down the window and yell into the night how much he loved his boyfriend. But as soon as he started leaning out the window, Youngbae clapped his hand over his mouth and pulled him back in.

He had forgotten how crazy and Un-Jiyong-like the younger man acted when he gets drunk, but he was having fun spending time with him, regardless of always having to be one step ahead of his antics.

Once they arrived at his apartment he pulled Jiyong out of the cab who was saying endless goodbyes to the cabbie. They made their way through the lobby of the building, and again Jiyong had to stop and say hi to every single person they ran into, and really all Youngbae could do was just roll his eyes and drag him into the elevator.

Finally they made it to his door and in the short amount of time in the elevator ride, Jiyong had quieted down and was almost falling asleep as he waited for Youngbae to unlock the door. Stumbling inside, the first place Jiyong went was the bathroom, with Youngbae laughing at his zombie-like sleepwalk down the hall, as he made his way towards it.

The older man went into the kitchen to get some water, because he knew both of them needed to drink something that wasn’t alcohol. He grabbed some bottles of water and as he turned around he heard Jiyong making his way back down the hallway, still half asleep.

He watched as the younger man struggled to get his jacket off, getting his arms tangled and tugging at the fabric. He tried his hardest not to laugh as he saw him pout and furrow his eyebrows in frustration. Honestly, he was like a little kid trying to take off clothes that were too big for him.

“ S’not funny.” Jiyong mumbled as he heard a snicker escape Youngbae.

“Yeah it kinda is actually.”

“I jus wanna go sleep. I can’t sleep with this stuuuupid thing on” He rambled.

Seeing him till struggling, the older man decided to be a good friend and help him get ready for bed. He pushed him into the spare bedroom where Jiyong had been sleeping for his stay, knowing that any minute he would probably fall over, and he knew Jiyong would be grateful to him in the morning if he fell on to his bed.

As soon as they made it into the room, Jiyong’s phone started ringing. And if Youngbae thought he had seen it all, he was mistaken. Jiyong spun around, flailing his arms around in his drunken sleepy state and groped himself to find his phone. Once he found it, he looked at the caller id and his face lit up in a giant smile as he answered the phone.

 

_One minute earlier_

 

All the way across the world, Seunghyun was in his apartment pacing in his living room, as he argued with himself on whether or not to call Jiyong. He hadn’t really heard from his boyfriend since he had gotten to New York other than a few small text messages here and there.

He had been a nervous wreck ever since he had left Jiyong standing in the parking lot, when he finally told him he loved him, days ago. He still was adamant about wanting to hear Jiyong's reply in person, but now he would give anything to hear his voice once again if only it was to say hello.

After shaking his head to clear all the random worries that were running through his mind, he check the clock for the thousandth time, just to make sure it was night over in New York. He looked at the phone that was in his palm, surprised that it hadn’t taken the form of his hands from how hard he was clutching it, and pressed button to call Jiyong.

He sucked in his breath and held it as he waited for the young man to answer.

“Seunghyun-ah! Tis my lovely boyfriend! I miss you soooooo much! You should come see me. Right now!”

He pulled his phone away from his ear to make sure he had called the right number. Seeing Jiyong’s caller id picture and shaking his head again, he brought the phone back up to his ear and could hear Jiyong giggling into the phone.

“Umm hello… Jiyong?”

“Heeeeelllllllooooo!”

“Are you okay?”

He heard another laugh.

“I’m wonderful now that you called me.”

Seunghyun could hear how his words were slurring together and he smiled to himself.

“Are you drunk?”

“Maaaybeeee…”

He heard some ruffling noises coming from Jiyong’s end.

“Yah! Bae s-stop it! I’m trying to talk to my boyfriend.”

Seunghyun’s heart stuttered at hearing that Jiyong was with someone this late at night. He heard more ruffling sounds and then a voice that was not’s Jiyong’s.

“I’m just trying to take this off of you.”

His stomach dropped. Not only was someone there with Jiyong, but whoever this person was, he was helping _his_ boyfriend take his clothes off. His head started spinning as he listened to the man and Jiyong have an argument.

“Jusss don’t worry about it!”

“Look, it’s almost off Ji.”

“No stop it, I wanna talk to Seunghyun-ah.”

“Ji just stand still for one more second- no wait!“

Seunghyun’s jaw dropped as he heard a large amount of commotion on the other end. Mixtures small screams, giggles, and lots of muffled noises, which only led him to think that the younger man might’ve dropped the phone.

“Jiyong! Jiyong! Is everything okay? What’s going on? Who’s with you?”

Instead of a direct reply he heard Jiyong’s distant voice.

“Mmph… Youngbae get off me! This isn’t your bed, silly!”

Seunghyun brought his hand to cover his mouth from shock after hearing his boyfriend utter those words. He was in a trance, almost like looking at a car wreck, it’s gruesome, you can’t look away, but for him, he couldn’t make himself hang up. His heart was racing and he became slightly dizzy so he walked over and sat on the edge of the couch, listening to what was going on miles away.

“Seunghyun-ah!”

He heard what was probably Jiyong grabbing for the fallen phone.

“Lovely boyfriend! You still there? Bae is funny. He was helping me take my clothes off and we fell onto the bed.”

Seunghyun felt like he was going to be sick. His boyfriend was on a bed with another man while he was completely intoxicated. He had no idea what was going on, who this Youngbae person was, or anything. He knew that he wasn’t in the right mindset to continue talking to him.

“Jiyong, I can’t talk to you right now. Not like this. Not after what I just heard.”

“No! Don’t hang up, I miss you! Youngbae getting off the bed and leaving now, so its okay.”

“Jiyong, I… I just can’t. Goodbye.”

He ended the call and stared at his phone, replaying everything over in his head trying to think of a reasonable explanation. But no matter how much he truly trusted his boyfriend, all that kept coming to mind was the possibility of him sleeping with another man at this very moment.

He saw a droplet of water appear on his phone screen and only then did he realize that he was starting to tear up. But he quickly wiped the tears away and went to his bathroom, wanting to take a blazing hot shower to burn away the heartache that was forming in his heart.

 


	21. Chapter 21

The pounding inside his head was what woke Jiyong up the next morning. When he started to sit up, he immediately fell back down clutching his head, trying to ease the intense pain. He didn’t know the last time he had a hangover like this, but it was a reminder of why he didn’t really like drinking in the first place.

He rolled over on his stomach and suddenly regretted that decision, for the pressure on his stomach almost made his dinner from the previous night come back up. He rolled over on to his back again and laid there, staring at the ceiling, trying to remember exactly what took place after he and Youngbae ate dinner.

He knew something had happened, he could feel in the back of his mind alongside the continuous pounding. But no matter how much he dwelled on it, he couldn’t remember. After about 20 minutes of just laying in bed, he finally thought it would be best to get some food in his system.

When he stood up, he looked down at what he was wearing and noticed that he had on a set of unfamiliar pajamas, he shrugged it off knowing it was useless trying to remember when he put them on, stretched his stiff muscles and made his way out into the apartment. As he opened his door, he was greeted with the delicious smell of whatever Youngbae was cooking in the kitchen.

“Good afternoon sunshine.” Youngbae said as he heard Jiyong open the fridge and grab a bottle of water. He shut the door and looked at what the older man was cooking in the skillet.

“Mmm smells good whatever it is, and did you just say afternoon? What time is it?”

“Its 2 in the afternoon and I just threw some leftovers from the other night together.”

Youngbae, who had been preoccupied with cooking finally looked up at Jiyong and busted out laughing as soon as he saw him.

“Dude you look like hell warmed over. I didn’t even know your hair could do that.”

Jiyong combed his fingers through his hair as he ran to the bathroom to see what he was laughing at. As he looked at his reflections he saw that his friends words were true, he looked like hell. His hair was going every which way and not only were there dark circles under his eyes but his eyes were also puffy and swollen. He tried to fix himself up as much as he could before he went back to the kitchen.

“Bae you know I’m a lightweight when it comes to drinking, what even happened last night? Why are my eyes like this?”

“Umm well… I don’t even really know what happened either. After we finished talking we came back here… You were drunk off your ass and couldn’t get your jacket off, so we went into your room and then your boyfriend called while I helped you change for bed. And I think he must have hung up on you for some reason cause next thing I know, you start crying because he won’t talk to you… and then you fell asleep.”

“Damn it.” Jiyong whispered to himself.

He rubbed his head as the pounding still made its presence known. He tried to think back to the phone call he supposedly had with Seunghyun, but he just couldn’t remember. The one thing that kept playing over and over in his head was why did Seunghyun hang up on him? He’s never the kind of person to do that.

He walked back to his room and grabbed his phone to see if Seunghyun had texted him. His heart fell a little when he saw that he had no new messages. It had been a few days since he got to New York and he was so used to talking with his boyfriend every day, that this sudden silence was starting to unravel him.

Checking the time again he thought best not to call Seunghyun, but send a text instead. Not really knowing what to say he just sent:

 

_Saw that you called me last night. I know you’re asleep right now and I have a show to photograph later tonight, but would you please call me back whenever you can._

_I miss you._

 

He hit send, and walked back out the kitchen, this time taking his phone with the hope that Seunghyun would reply right away, but knowing he would have to wait hours to hear his voice again.

After he and Youngbae ate, they started getting ready for Youngbae’s show that was starting at 7. Grabbing his camera and a few lenses, Youngbae and him walked out of the apartment. Jiyong checked his phone for the thousandth time, but still no reply from Seunghyun.

 

 

One thing he loved about fashion week was the intense energy that filled up the entire place. People were constantly running around getting last minute details set; models with hair and makeup, crew with staging and lighting, designers with touch ups on their clothes. And Jiyong was there to capture all the chaos through his lens.

Walking around taking everything in, he tried staying out of the way taking behind the scenes shots. As he passed by a quieter part of the room he almost dropped his camera when he heard the small beep of his cell phone. He scrambled to pull the strap over his shoulder as he reached for his phone in his pocket. Seeing that it really was a message from Seunghyun, Jiyong’s heart leapt. He ran over to Youngbae to tell him that he was going out for a minute but he would be back in time for the start of the show and then made his way outside to read the message.

 

_You sounded pretty drunk last night and I take it you don’t remember what happened, which hurts even more. I don’t know how to talk to you after what I heard. My mind keeps thinking of the worst things possible and I don’t know if I want you to explain just yet. I need some time. Maybe I’ll call you in a couple days._

 

Jiyong’s legs almost gave out on him as he reread the message over and over. What the hell happened last night? What did Seunghyun hear? So many things were running through his head. He looked at his phone again and before he knew it, he was calling Seunghyun.

After a couple rings it went voicemail, he hung up and tried again. 2 rings, went to voicemail. He dialed for the third time but this time it went straight to voicemail, meaning that Seunghyun had turned his phone off.

His hands started shaking and he was becoming light headed. He heard a voice behind him but couldn’t make out what the other person was saying until he felt a hand on his shoulder, turning him around.

“Jiyong, the shows about to start. Go grab your seat in the photographers section.” Youngbae only noticed his friend’s expression after he finished speaking.

“Jiyong are you alright?” He said, turning the younger man towards him more so he could get a better look at him.

“Bae, please." Jiyong pleaded. "Can you think of anything… _anything_ , that Seunghyun could have heard last night while I was talking to him, that he could’ve mistaken for something else?”

Jiyong watched as Youngbae thought back to last night.

“Umm like I said before, you were drunk… you couldn’t get you jacket off so I helped yo-“

His eyes widened as he cut himself off remembering something.

“You know actually at one point you were moving around so much that when I almost had the jacket off you, our arms got twisted and we fell onto the bed together, and you said something like ‘Get off me, this isn’t your bed.’ Maybe that was it…”

Jiyong groaned and rubbed the side of his head trying to recall last night, hoping that Youngbae’s words would trigger something. He and Seunghyun had just started this relationship and he had already fucked it up somehow. All he wanted to do was come to the city, help his friends out for a while and then go back home to him and spend a weekend in Jeju with his boyfriend.

He racked his brain, thinking about everything that had happened since he left for New York, for any possibly reason that could have led Seunghyun to believe… whatever it was he thought he believed.

“Shit!”

“What? What is it?” Youngbae asked.

“I just realized… I never actually told him that I was going to be staying with you while I’m here.”

“What?”

“Seunghyun. He must have thought I’d be staying in a hotel or something. And when he called last night and heard you… and you were trying to take my jacket off… and we fell onto the bed… and… Shit! Damn it!”

Jiyong started cursing himself as the pieces started falling into place. Seunghyun must have heard Youngbae and thought he was cheating on him.

Youngbae looked down at his watch and said, “Jiyong it’s going to be fine. It’s just a misunderstanding. Don’t worry about it too much. Let’s go, finish the show, and then we can figure out how to fix this, okay?”

Jiyong internally scoffed at his friends words, ‘It’s going to be fine.’ How could it be fine when your boyfriend thinks you’re cheating on him and he probably won’t answer his phone for the next couple days. No, everything was not going to be fine.

He rubbed his hand down his face trying to compose himself and put on a fake smile for Youngbae.

“Yeah come on. This is your night so let’s make the most of it.”

Youngbae smiled back at him, knowing that his smile wasn’t genuine, but played along anyways as they both made their way back inside.

 

 

The show was perfection. Youngbae’s collection was colorful but not over the top, and everything blended together to tell a story. Jiyong was there to capture every second of it, trying to put his own personal problems aside and be there for his friend.

After the show they went to a small after party with designers, models, socialites, and other VIPs. Jiyong tried to act like he was having fun but ever since the end of the show, he went right back to worrying about Seunghyun.

He could only stomach staying at the party for only an hour until he found Youngbae and told him that he was going to go back to the apartment. Youngbae nodded, seeing the distress on his friends face and handed him his keys.

Once he made it to the apartment, he sat on the couch, pulled out his phone and tried calling Seunghyun again.

Still no answer.

Jiyong fell onto his side staring at the screen. His heart clenched and his eyes stung, as he tried to fight back tears. He just wanted to hear Seunghyun’s voice and tell him it was all a big misunderstanding.

He laid on the couch feeling completely numb as he thought of ways to try and get in touch with him, when all of a sudden he got an idea. Looking through his phone he found the number he wanted and hit call.

“Hello? Jiyong?”

“Hey Seungri, I was wondering… Do you have umm… Vick’s managers phone number?” Jiyong bit his tongue as he almost said Seunghyun. Despite relying on his assistant for almost everything, he really didn’t share his relationship with him.

“You mean Daesung? Yeah I have his number. We were just hanging out actually.”

“What?! I didn’t know you were friends with him.”

“Yeah that day you had the one session with Vick a couple months back, we went to grab lunch and found out we had something’s in common, so we’ve been hanging out off and on since.”

“Really? Huh…” Jiyong was stunned into silence for a minute. “Does he talk about Vick at all?”

“Yes and no. He complains to me how much of a pain Vick is to handle, lately though he seems to be in a better mood though.”

Jiyong started getting a little nervous, he was curious as to whether or not Daesung had told Seungri anything about their relationship.

“Yeah and why is that?”

“Oh umm… I didn’t really ask but I think he mentioned something about Vick starting a relationship with someone, so he’s not being as much of an ass to Daesung lately.”

“Oh he’s in a relationship? Did he say with who?” Jiyong asked trying to pretend like he didn’t know.

“No he didn’t say who… Hey I thought you wanted Daesung’s number? Why are you asking me all these questions? And aren’t you actually friends with Vick? Ask him yourself who he’s dating.”

Jiyong muttered to himself, “If I could actually get in touch with him…”

“What was that?”

“Nothing, just give me Daesung’s number.”

Seungri gave it to him and they said their goodbyes.

He stared at his phone that had the number in it ready to be dialed, but all of a sudden Jiyong started questioning himself. He knew Daesung knew about his and Seunghyun’s relationship, but he still didn’t know how much his boyfriend had told him, and whether or not this phone call would ruin things more.

He shook his head, deciding that nothing could hurt the situation more than what has already happened and called Daesung.

 

 

_Seoul – 2 days later_

 

Seunghyun woke up in the middle of the afternoon for the second day in a row. Ever since ‘that night’ he was plagued with worries and insecurities about himself and his relationship with Jiyong, making it hard for him to get any sleep.

The first thing he did was check his phone and he saw that Jiyong had tried to call him multiple times throughout the night. His heart tightened, feeling guilty for ignoring him, but he just didn’t know if he could take it, hearing his boyfriend explain how he might’ve slept with someone else, before they had even gotten that far in their relationship.

As he went to place his phone back down on his bedside table, he felt it vibrate. Knowing it was probably Jiyong again, he still checked to make sure. His eyebrows rose a little, surprised that it was actually Daesung who was calling him.

“Daesung? Why are you calling me?”

“Sorry, it’s just that something’s come up and I need to come over. I’ll be there in about half an hour, okay?”

“Yeah fine… I’ll probably be in the shower so just let yourself in. What’s going on anyway?”

“It’s hard to explain over the phone. I’ll just tell you in person.”

“Whatever. See you in a bit.”

He hung up, trying to think what the big emergency was as he made his way into the bathroom.

 

Pulling the shower curtain back, Seunghyun could barely see the door due to all the steam that had been created from his shower. He grabbed the towel and wrapped it around himself as he walked back into his room. Looking at the clock he realized that he was in the shower longer than he thought and yelled out towards the front of the apartment.

“Daesung, you here?”

He heard a familiar voice call back, “Yeah I’m here.”

“I just got out of the shower, so let me throw something on and I’ll be out.”

He grabbed a pair of sweatpants and was about to put them on when he had a thought, so he yelled back out, “We don’t have to go anywhere do we?”

“No. Just hurry up will you.”

He rolled his eyes and proceeded to put the sweatpants on, as well as a black tank top, grateful that he didn’t have to go out in public, and made his way into the living room. As he walked out his was too preoccupied with drying his hair with a towel to notice that Daesung and him were not the only ones in the apartment. Only when he heard Daesung clear his throat did he look up, freezing in his spot.

“What are you doing here Jiyong?” He asked, glaring at his boyfriend.

Jiyong could tell from Seunghyun’s voice that he was not happy at all to see him, in fact he looked pissed at his sudden appearance. He squirmed under his boyfriends intense stare as he tried to explain.

“I-I umm… well… y-you wouldn’t answer my phone calls or text messages. And after the text you sent, I knew what had happened the other night was a misunderstanding. But you wouldn’t give me the chance to explain…”

“So you drop everything that you had to do in New York and rope Daesung into bringing you here?”

“I was almost done… so it didn’t matter whether or not I left early. What matters is clearing up this whole situation.”

Seunghyun eyed Daesung and then looked back at Jiyong.

“Is this the big emergency? I just woke up and I don’t want to deal with this right now. Just go home.”

He waited for Jiyong to speak up, but it was Daesung’s voice that he heard.

“No Seunghyun, Just listen to what he has to say. Honestly you’re over thinking it.”

“So you know everything, I suppose?”

“Yes. Now just sit on the couch and talk to him.” Daesung moved over toward Seunghyun and pulled him to the couch, forcing him to sit down.

Jiyong hesitantly walked over and sat next to him, but as he did, Seunghyun moved to face away from him. When he saw that, his heart tightened and he looked up at Daesung, silently pleading for some advice on how to talk to him.

Daesung shrugged his shoulders and shook his head, saying he didn’t know what to do either.

“Listen, I’m gonna go now, and let you two talk things through. Seunghyun please, for both your sanity and mine, just let him explain what really happened.”

And with that Daesung walked out of the apartment and the left the two men sitting on the couch in silence.


	22. Chapter 22

Jiyong sat on the couch, fiddling with his hands as he tried to think of where to start. He must have taken too long for Seunghyun because the man spoke up, still facing away from him.

“If you’re not going to talk then just get out.”

“Please don’t be like this…”

“Well you’re the one who showed out of nowhere.”

Jiyong sighed, he should have known this was how Seunghyun was going to act with his uninvited appearance.

“Yes I did. And I’m sorry but it was the only way I could talk to you, but you’re not even trying to talk.”

Seunghyun whipped his head around and looked at Jiyong

“Oh, I’m so sorry if I sound the slightest bit pissed off and don’t want to talk because I think my boyfriend cheated on me.”

And there it was, he had finally said it. The phrase that had been running through both their minds for the past couple days. Jiyong hung his head in shame for even giving a reason for Seunghyun think that.

Seunghyun watched as Jiyong stayed silent and let out a frustrated growl as he ran his hands through his wet hair.

“God Jiyong! How could you do this to me…”

Jiyong looked up and saw that Seunghyun was hiding his face in his hands.

“Look at me please.”

The older man didn’t move.

“Seunghyun… please just look at me.”

Still no movement. Jiyong decided to take charge because, as of right now, this conversation was going nowhere. He leaned over and brought Seunghyun’s hands down into his right hand, as his left slowly turned Seunghyun to face him.

What he saw broke his heart. It was almost like they were back at their first meeting, the photo shoot. The raw emotion that he had shown that day was written all over his face. His eyes were red but they did not let any tears fall, Jiyong could tell he was holding them back.

They gazed at each other for a few minutes, finally being able to truly make eye contact for the first time in over a week. The more Jiyong looked at his boyfriends pained expression, the more he was feeling the pain himself, and he knew it was starting to show on his face. So without taking up any more time, Jiyong began to explain.

“First off, I want you know… I did not cheat on you.”

Seunghyun didn’t give any reaction but just kept on listening.

“I want you to know too that in the very few relationships that I’ve had, never has the thought of cheating come to my mind. Because I would never want to go through that heartache myself, so I would never put my lover through it either.”

Jiyong saw a flash of pain sweep across Seunghyun’s eyes when he mentioned his past relationships, but he thought it best to be completely honest with him throughout this whole thing.

“Now, as for what happened… I realized only just the other day that I actually never told you that I would be staying with an old _friend_ while I was in New York.” Jiyong tried to emphasize friend as much as possible just so Seunghyun wouldn’t have any more misunderstandings.

“Youngbae and I became _friends_ when I was just starting to do photography for magazines, he was a young designer and I did a pictorial of his collection. We’ve been _friends_ for over 6 years now …” Jiyong brought both his hands up to hold Seunghyun’s face right in front of him, just so he could make sure he got his point across. “And he is 100% straight. He’s actually engaged to be married in August.”

Looking into his eye’s, Jiyong saw as the information click with Seunghyun. With his hands still holding his cheeks, he felt him release a sigh, letting some of the tension out of his body.

Finally after staying quiet for some time, Seunghyun spoke up, “Ok then… what exactly happened that night if it wasn’t… you know…”

Jiyong tried his hardest not to laugh at the expression that was now on Seunghyun’s face. He looked uncomfortable, frustrated, and cute all at the same time, like a kid trying to figure out a hard math problem, as he tried to think of what had actually took place.

Letting go of his face, Jiyong looked down and laced his fingers through the older man’s as he continued with the explanation.

“Well that night, after we went to one of the smaller shows, we grabbed some food and beers and sat in a small park, talking and catching up with each other. I wanted to tell him all about you but I was hesitant because of you celebrity status. Youngbae really wanted me to talk about what had happened since I moved over to Korea, but I wasn’t really talking as much as he wanted. He knows how much of a light weight I can be and he decided to get me drunk just so I would forgo my barriers that I usually have up, and tell him everything.”

Jiyong saw Seunghyun nod out of the corner of his eye, for he still kept looking at their laced hands as he talked.

“Long story short, I was drunk off my ass when we got back to his place and I couldn’t take the jacket I was wearing off so he helped me. You called in the middle of that, he almost had the jacket off of me but then when I tried to shoo him away, our arms got tangled and we ended up falling on the bed. He immediately got up and finished taking the jacket off me while I tried talking to you after dropping the phone. Then you hung up on me and I guess I was so upset that you wouldn’t talk to me that I started crying, and I was just a drunken mess who looked like hell the next morning...”

Jiyong finished, but didn’t look up. He wanted to wait until Seunghyun said something. All of a sudden he felt a small movement coming from the older man. Finally he looked up and saw that Seunghyun’s shoulders were shaking, and he felt his hand do the same from holding his. He watched as his boyfriend let all the tension release from his body and relax back into the couch, chuckling to himself.

“Is everything okay?”

Seunghyun cleared his throat as he said, “Yeah… I’m just laughing at myself.”

Jiyong scrunched his eyebrows together, not understanding fully.

Seunghyun looked over and saw his expression, so he leaned over, taking the smaller man’s hands into his and said, “I’m supposed to be this big huge celebrity, that girls fawn over and guys want to be. But really I’m just an ordinary guy who becomes jealous. I guess I’m laughing because I’m so used to being a celebrity, that I forget I’m a person too. With basic human emotions and whatnot.”

He paused and squeezed Jiyong’s hands, making the younger man look into his eyes as he continued, “I’m sorry… I jumped to conclusions, I’m sorry for not giving you the chance to explain… and I’m sorry for not trusting you. It’s just… if you heard what I heard… you probably would have thought the same thing…

 

Jiyong nodded. “I know and I completely understood why you reacted that way. But honestly what hurt the most… was that you thought I actually did cheat, that you didn’t trust me. And I woke up the next morning, not being able to remember anything, and you weren’t texting me or calling me back… and I just didn’t know why until you sent that message and-“

He was suddenly cut off by Seunghyun who leaned over and kissed him. Jiyong froze at the unexpected gesture and Seunghyun rested his forehead up against his own as their lips parted. He looked into the older man’s eyes and his heart started racing, feeling his warm breath caress his cheeks. Then, in probably the sexiest, deepest voice, Seunghyun said, “Rambling…”

And with just that little phrase, Jiyong knew he had been forgiven. He smiled from ear to ear as he wrapped his arms around Seunghyun and buried his face in his boyfriends shoulder. Seunghyun lost his balance and ended up falling back onto the couch with Jiyong on top of him.

Both of them looked at each other, a slight awkwardness hanging in the air. It had only been a few minutes ago that Seunghyun wouldn’t even look at Jiyong and now they were lying on the couch together, millimeters apart.

Seunghyun looked at Jiyong, taking in every feature that he had missed over the last week, and watched as heat rose up in Jiyong’s cheeks. Embarrassed by the intense stare, Jiyong started to bit his lip. Seunghyun watched as the young man’s lower lip disappeared behind his teeth, and that was the one move that put him over the edge.

He leaned up and claimed Jiyong’s mouth for his own. Jiyong released his lower lip and let Seunghyun take control. Moving their lips across one another’s, Seunghyun brought his hands up and tangled them into Jiyong’s blonde locks. Feeling him tug at his hair, Jiyong gave a small moan and slightly parted his lips, letting Seunghyun’s tongue slip past.

Jiyong just let Seunghyun have his way with him, reveling in the fact that this small hiccup of a misunderstanding didn’t affect their relationship really at all. He moved his hands up the sides of Seunghyun and rested them on his waist, using them as leverage to push himself more up onto Seunghyun, so he could have better access to his mouth.

When Jiyong moved, Seunghyun felt him straddle his waist, which added pressure to his already growing hardness. Tugging on his hair more, he grinded their hips together to create some more friction that he desperately needed.

Their kisses were becoming sloppier as things progressed, tongues sliding against each other, teeth clicking together, and moans coming from both of them.

Seunghyun slid his hands down towards the bottom of Jiyong’s shirt and let his hands disappear underneath the fabric. He could feel Jiyong’s muscles contract at his touch as his fingers danced their way across his skin.

Jiyong separated from Seunghyun for a moment to catch his breath and looked down at the beautiful man below him. He saw his cheeks we just as red as his must have been and that, he too, was using this sudden pause to catch his breath.

They gazed at each other, taking in the moment. Seunghyun pulled his right hand out from under the younger man’s shirt and brought it up to his face, gliding it across his cheekbone.

Jiyong smiled at the touch and moved his hand to Seunghyun’s cheek, mimicking the gesture. After a few seconds, Jiyong leaned down, capture his boyfriend’s lips in another kiss and then moved back up to look at him as he said, “I’m so glad you came back into my life. And I promise you… I’ll never give you another reason to doubt me or our relationship.”

Seunghyun leaned his head against Jiyong’s palm as he kept stroking his cheek. Jiyong closed his eyes and took a deep breath and exhaled, as if he was preparing to say something. Lost in thought and being his usual self, he started to squirm on top of Seunghyun out of uneasiness, not realizing the effect it was having on the older man.

Seunghyun quickly brought his hands down and placed them on Jiyong’s hips trying to still his movement.

“Jiyong, I know you want to say something, because it’s written all over your face, but for the love of god would you stop moving like that.”

The younger man gasped and covered his face in embarrassment.

“Oh god, I didn’t even know I was doing that.” He mumbled behind his hands.

Seunghyun laughed at his boyfriend’s reaction, he really did love the shy side of him the most, it was what attracted him in the first place. And plus he always liked making him blush and flustered.

He moved his hands down and started rubbing small circles with his thumbs on Jiyong’s thighs as he waited for the man to say whatever he was going to say. Taking another breath, Jiyong let his hands fall as he focused on Seunghyun’s eyes, his face turning bright red. With another small breath he finally spoke.

“Seunghyun… I’ve been wanting to say this for a very long time… even before you said it to me… but I-I…” He took a deep breath and brought his hands up to cups his boyfriends face for the second time that day.

“I love you…”

He leaned down and kissed the older man not waiting for a reply, like Seunghyun had done to him on the day he left for New York.

Seunghyun’s heart almost exploded at hearing those words come from Jiyong. He took the opportunity to wrap his arms around him trying to convey that he needed him as close as possible as they began making out again. He could feel a deep sense of need and passion from the man above him as his lips moved across his own. Feeling a little bold, Seunghyun captured Jiyong’s bottom lip in between his teeth and slightly bit down, causing his boyfriend to groan at the pain.

Jiyong grinded his hips down onto Seunghyun’s, feeling both of their growing erections rub against each other. Seunghyun hissed at the friction and dug his nails into Jiyong’s thighs. He could feel the younger man smirk against his lips, knowing that this was quickly becoming a game of sorts, a game he would be more than willing to play.

Using all of his strength, he managed to flip them over to where he was now on top of Jiyong,. The younger man’s breath caught in his throat from the sudden movement, but he let his boyfriend continue doing whatever he wanted to him, surrendering completely.

Moving his hands under his boyfriend’s shirt once again, Seunghyun brushed his fingertips across Jiyong’s stomach. He moved his mouth along Jiyong’s jaw and over his throat as he made his way down his body. Seunghyun started to push Jiyong’s shirt off him, not wanting to deal the restrictive fabric any longer.

Jiyong sat up and let the older man take it off of him and then watched as he tossed it to the other side of the room. He felt Seunghyun push him back down and started moving his lips across the newly exposed skin, with Jiyong’s heavy breaths filling the air.

Just as his mouth made it to the bottom of Jiyong’s sternum, Seunghyun slid his thumb across the younger man’s nipple, making him gasp. Jiyong’s chest rose up to greet the movement, making his stomach bevel inwards. Seunghyun darted his tongue out and licked his way down the curve, stopping just below his boyfriend’s belly button, and rested his chin there as he watched Jiyong in his lust filled state.

With cheeks flushed and sounds coming from his mouth that sounded like a mixture of moans and heavy breathing, Seunghyun could only marvel at the sight of Jiyong. He looked beautiful, cute and sexy as hell, all at the same time.

He lifted himself up a bit and moved his hands down to the button on the younger mans jeans, popping it open and pulling the zipper down.

“S-Seungh-hyun.” He heard the man below him gasp.

He flicked his eyes up and found that Jiyong was already looking at him, his eyes glazed over.

“Jiyong… if you want me to stop all you have to do is say so…” He meant what he just said, but he prayed that the younger man wouldn’t say no after they’ve gotten this far. He watched as Jiyong nodded, giving him permission to continues his ministrations. He flashed him a coy smile and then ghosted his hot breath across the top of Jiyong’s boxers.

Seunghyun slid down further between his legs and moved his hands underneath him, pulling his pants down and out of his way. Looking down, he saw Jiyong’s erection clear as day, growing underneath the fabric of his boxers. He glanced back up at his boyfriend just to make sure he hadn’t changed his mind and saw that he was still looking at him.

He smirked back and kept his eyes on Jiyong’s’ as he bent his head down and captured the man’s hardness in his mouth, with only the fabric in his way. Jiyong bucked his hips into the warmth and threw his arm over his eyes, for if he watched Seunghyun any more it would be his undoing, and this would end too fast.

Seunghyun chuckled against Jiyong and the younger man released a moan at the vibrations. Finally the older man took some pity on him and pulled down his boxers, freeing his erection.

Jiyong sucked in a breath as the cool air passed over him. Moving to the right just a bit, Seunghyun kissed around Jiyong’s cock and onto the skin between his hip and thigh. He teased the younger man by licking the skin so close to where he really wanted him. He let his teeth graze across his flesh, taking a small nip here and there until he heard a pant from above him.

“Please… Seunghyun…”

He nearly lost it. Not wanting to waste anymore time, he gave into Jiyong’s breathy plea and placed his lips on the tip of his cock.

Jiyong gasped at the touch and laced his fingers through the older man’s hair. Seunghyun darted out his tongue and lick his way down to Jiyong’s base, the younger man shivered and tugged his hair. He then licked his way back up to the tip and slid his tongue over the slit to capture the precum that had formed, into his mouth.

Having just that small taste of Jiyong on his tongue made Seunghyun hungry for more, and finally, he took all of Jiyong into his mouth.

“Oh god!”

Hearing the younger man cry out only fueled him more as he started to bob his head up and down Jiyong’s cock. He used his tongue and ran it along the vein on the underside of his length, soliciting another gasp from his boyfriend. He hollowed his cheeks and started moving faster, with only the sound of Jiyong’s incoherent mumblings filling his ears.

The younger man jerked his hips up causing Seunghyun to gag a little, but he quickly moved his hand across Jiyong’s waist to keep him still as he pick up his pace.

Seunghyun hummed against the younger man, making him cry out, and then opened his mouth more to take all of Jiyong in at once, hitting the back of his throat.

“Hmm… Seun…hyu… yes… yes…”

He felt Jiyong’s hips start to move more. Knowing what this meant, Seunghyun moved faster and faster.

“God… hnnnn… Seunghyun… I’m… I’m gonna…”

Hollowing his cheeks one last time, he felt Jiyong’s body tense up beneath him as he released into his mouth, the salty liquid moving down his throat as he swallowed. He let his tongue slide up along the length, as he released Jiyong’s cock from his mouth and brushed fingers against his lips, wiping off any excess.

Seunghyun watched Jiyong’s chest rise and fall as he tried to steady his breathing after what just took place. The younger man finally looked down at Seunghyun and pulled him up to lock their lips together. Jiyong could taste himself on Seunghyun and it only made him deepen the kiss. After another few minutes, they parted to let air back into their lungs.

Not wanting to crush his boyfriend, Seunghyun rolled onto his side and wrapped his arms around Jiyong, soaking in the moment. Jiyong nestled into the embrace but took it a step further by intertwining their legs together, not wanting any part of his body left untouched by Seunghyun. But as he did that he felt something.

“Umm Seunghyun… do you want me to take care of that?” He whispered into the man’s ear as his knee rubbed against the older man’s somewhat hard erection.

Weariness starting to take over, he groaned at the movement, “No, I’ll be okay… I just want to stay like this for a while…”

Jiyong nodded into his chest taking a mental note that he owed Seunghyun. He felt the older man start to rub his back as he said into the room, “Jiyong… I really do love you… please always remember that.”

Squeezing him tighter, Jiyong smiled and placed a kiss right over Seunghyun’s heart and mumbled, “I love you too… never forget that.”

Closing his eyes as exhaustion from their activity and jet lag caught up with him, Jiyong fell asleep in Seunghyun’s arms, with the older man not far behind.

 


	23. Chapter 23

A soft distant voice tickled Seunghyun’s ears while he stirred in his sleep. It was light and pleasant. Melodic and singsong. And very familiar. The voice was close enough that he could hear the person was singing, but distant enough where he couldn’t make out the words. Curiosity overtook his senses as he let the sweet voice pull him from his sleep and into reality.

He pushed himself up, sitting upright on the couch, as he rubbed sleep out of his eyes and stretched his tight muscles, remembering why he hated sleeping on the stupid piece of furniture. His ears perked up when he heard the same voice that woke him, coming from the kitchen. Looking over his heart almost stopped at the sight that greeted him.

Jiyong was moving about the kitchen, in his own little world, dressed only in boxers and an oversized t-shirt, singing to himself as he worked. Seunghyun noticed the young man’s hair was wet and all over the place, like he had just taken a towel to it, which made the sight of him that much sexier.

His boyfriend shook his head and danced to the beat that only he could hear, as he went from the fridge to the counter, the cabinets to the stove and started cooking whatever it was he had found. Seunghyun watched him for a few minutes, taking the opportunity to observe a side of Jiyong he had never seen before, carefree.

As he sat there he finally started to really take in his boyfriends singing, it was breath taking, and pulled him in, never wanting the sweet tune to end. And just like a siren from the sea, the man’s voice drew him in, making him get up and walk over to the breakfast bar to be closer to him.

“If this is how I can wake up every day, I don’t know if I’d want to ever leave the house again.”

“Oh my god Seunghyun! You scared the shit out of me,” Jiyong exclaimed as he turned around to face his boyfriend, with his hand clutching his heart.

Seunghyun laughed and walked around the bar. He took the young man’s hand down from his chest and wrapped his arms around him, in a soft embrace as he said, “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s okay. Just don’t do it again.”

Seunghyun took in a deep breath, smelling his shampoo on Jiyong’s wet hair.

“So, not only do you come to my house unannounced, but you take a shower, use my shampoo…” He leaned back and tugged at the hem of the shirt the he was wearing. “And also raid my closet?”

Jiyong bit his lip in embarrassment and said, “Sorry, sorry, it’s just I went from a show directly to the airport, and then came straight here after I landed, and then after what we did earlier I just couldn’t take it anymore, I needed to take a shower. And then I realized that I left my luggage in Daesung’s car so I didn’t have any clean clothes… so I kinda bowered some of yours…” He gazed up at Seunghyun when he finished speaking with a shy, apologetic look, asking for his boyfriend’s forgiveness.

It was like looking at a puppy that had just been caught doing something it shouldn’t have been, and you never have the heart to actually yell at the poor thing because it’s so cute and innocent. So all Seunghyun could do was pull Jiyong’s face to his, kissing him to show his forgiveness. He pulled away and rested his forehead on the younger man’s and said, “God. You make it so hard to stay mad at you when do stuff like this.”

Jiyong gave a small smile and brought his lip back up behind his teeth.

“You just love doing that, don’t you?”

His boyfriend lifted his shoulders and cocked his head to the side with a coy expression, trying to play dumb.

“Ugghhh… I could just eat you up, you know that?”

Jiyong smirked. “I think you took care of that earlier.”

Heat immediately rose to Seunghyun’s cheeks, not only from his boyfriends blatant words, but also from the images that flashed in his mind, replaying their intimate encounter.

Jiyong giggled, happy that the tables had turned as he made the older man blush for once. He stood on his tip toes and kissed the tip of Seunghyun’s nose and pushed himself out of the embrace, shoving Seunghyun back towards the breakfast bar. “Now go sit over there. I’m busy making dinner.”

“Dinner? I thought it would be morning by now, what time is it?”

“It’s 9p.m., we only slept for a couple hours, and I’m starving.”

Seunghyun nodded his head and made his way back to the bar, pulling out a stool and sitting to continue watching his boyfriend cook. He sat there thinking about how wonderful it was to have another person in this big apartment, it made it feel like it really was a home now, with the sounds of cooking and the smell of food filling the air, Seunghyun wanted this moment to last forever.

He thought about how hours ago he didn’t want to even look at the man, and that broke him inside. He knew that his happiness will always be because of the man in front of him, which made him think about how he never wanted be away from his side for too long.

He saw Jiyong reach up to the spice cabinet above the stove to grab something, which lifted his shirt up to exposing the creamy smooth expanse of his lower back, and Seunghyun’s hands itched to touch it. Despite it almost looking like a tent on him, there really were no words to describe how sexy Jiyong looked wearing one of his old t-shirts. With that in mind, he realized he needed to make a phone call.

He watched as the young man struggled to grab whatever he was after because it was just out of his reach. Seunghyun took mercy on him and got up, pressing against the younger man’s back as he asked what he was wanting.

Jiyong stilled from the sudden contact but answered, “The pepper flakes. Why must you be so tall, I can hardly reach half the stuff I need.”

Seunghyun chuckled, pulling down the container and handing it to Jiyong.

“I have to go call Daesung. I’ll be back in a minute.” He kissed the top of his head and let his fingers glide across Jiyong’s hips and back as he left the room, leaving the man tingling from his touch.

 

Halfway through dinner, the doorbell rang and Seunghyun got up to answer it, knowing who it was. Daesung walked in carrying a large suitcase and set it down on the couch. Seeing this, Jiyong got up and rushed over and thanked the man for bringing it.

“No its okay, I have to move something tomorrow so I needed the room in my trunk anyway.” Daesung looked at Jiyong noticing for the first time what he was wearing and then looked to Seunghyun. “So I take it you guys made up?”

Jiyong looked down, remembering he was only wearing boxers on the lower half of his body and turned beet red. He scrambled over to his suitcase, and pulled out a pair of pajama bottoms, then ran off to the bathroom.

Daesung and Seunghyun laughed.

“Yeah, we talked it out and I realized that it was a big misunderstanding.”

“So everything’s good between you then?”

Seunghyun nodded. “I think we became closer because of it, stronger.”

“Well that’s good. I hope something like this doesn’t happen again because I hate dealing with the pissy you.”

Seunghyun glared at his manager who just rolled his eyes in response.

“No, but seriously, I’m really happy for you. You need him in your life.”

“Don’t I know it…” He mumbled to himself.

Jiyong reentered the room now fully clothed and thanked Daesung again. The manager said that he had to get going, so he waved goodbye and left for the second time that day.

“Does he really have to move something tomorrow or did you specifically call him to drop off my suitcase?”

“I called him.”

Jiyong was about to say something but Seunghyun cut him off. “But I have a reason why.” He walked over and placed his hand on the ruff canvas that made up the suitcase and looked at the younger man.

“Earlier when you were explaining how you forgot this and you had to borrow some of mine… it got me thinking.” He took a deep breath knowing what he was about to say would hopefully help their relationship progress. “Why don’t you leave some clothes here? You know, in case you feel like staying over a night or two. I’m not saying to move in, because I don’t think we’re ready for _that_ but I… I just want you here… with me. With you here, this place feels like home.” He looked up and waited for a reply from his boyfriend.

A huge smile spread across Jiyong’s face as he said, “Really? You really mean that?”

Seunghyun brought his hand up and scratched the back of his head. “Yeah… I really do.”

The next thing he knew, he was being tackled as Jiyong ran over, squeezing him tight. He looked down, smiling and asked, “So is this a yes?”

Not lifting his head up, Jiyong nodded into his shoulder. Seunghyun’s heart exploded and he picked the man up, hugging him back and squeezing tighter. When he set him down, he pulled back and brought his hands up to cup Jiyong’s face and leaned in for a kiss.

Their lips pressed tightly against each others, Jiyong parted his lips and licked Seunghyun’s, begging for entrance. The older man moaned softly as he parted his lips as well and their tongues slid against each other.

Jiyong hands fisted the fabric on the back of Seunghyun’s shirt as he pressed closer, wanting to be able to explore his mouth and taste him as much as possible. After a while they separated, breathing heavily as they tried to catch their breath, and then Jiyong whispered, “I love you.”

Seunghyun squeezed him once more before he untangled himself from the young man and grabbed the suitcase. “Come on, let’s find a spot for these.”

 

Over the next two weeks they spent a couple nights together at Seunghyun’s place, both getting used to the notion of living together but not really “ _living together_ ”, but Jiyong really didn’t have as much time as he wanted because he had to get ready for the pictorial shoot in Jeju.

He had meeting after meeting he had to attend so him, the staff, models, and designer could go over every detail and schedule. The designer wanted everything set before they left so all they had to do was land on Monday night and start taking pictures Tuesday morning.

The Sunday before the shoot, Seunghyun decided to go over to Jiyong’s place instead, wanting to help him pack the rest of his equipment. What puzzled Seunghyun was how much of a nervous wreck his boyfriend had become in preparation for this. Jiyong kept running around, checking and rechecking that he had everything he needed, when finally Seunghyun reached out and stopped him.

“Hey look at me.” Jiyong did. “I don’t know why you’re so worked up about this but everything will be fine. You’ve done hundreds of these before, so let’s just order some take out, watch a movie, and relax for the rest of the night, okay?”

Jiyong let out a long sigh and rested his head against the older man’s chest. “I’m sorry. I just have these butterflies in my stomach that won’t go away and I’m trying to distract myself with work.”

Seunghyun pulled the man back to look at him, furrowing his brows. “Wait… I thought you were nervous about the shoot?”

“No, not really. I have something else on my mind.”

“And that would be…”

Jiyong covered his face in his hands and mumbled something that Seunghyun couldn’t understand.

“What?”

Sighing again, Jiyong looked up, with a tint in his face, and softly said, “I’m nervous about after the shoot… when it’ll be just us.”

Seunghyun brought his hand up and started brushing his thumb over Jiyong’s cheek as he said, “You’re not the only one who’s nervous about that, you know?”

Jiyong gave a slight nod and leaned into his boyfriend's hand. “I know, it’s just… We’ve waited so long… I’m just scared that we’ve worked it up to much and… and I’m worried it’ll be a letdown somehow.” He gave another big sigh as he lowered his eyes, taking a sudden interest in the carpet.

Tucking his finger under the younger man’s chin, Seunghyun brought his head up making Jiyong look at him. “Jiyong… here…” He grabbed his hand and rested it on his chest over his fast-beating heart.

“Do you feel that? My heart beating a mile a minute? This… is just from you touching me.” He held the younger man’s hand against his chest as he leaned in to kiss him. The younger man felt his heart beat quicken. He pulled back after a second and continued, “That is from being able to kiss you. And this is what happens when I say… I love you.”

Jiyong looked at his hand against the chest and felt as if he was holding a small humming bird in his palm with the way Seunghyun’s heart started beating.

“This is what you make me feel. And words can’t describe how much it means to me that I’m with you and we came back together after all this time. Forget what happened the other week… and don’t ever doubt what you and our relationship mean to me. When it does happen… it will be the best moment of my life.”

Jiyong let the words sink in as he leaned up to claim Seunghyun’s lips for a quick, loving kiss. After bringing his head back down his nestled into his boyfriends larger, strong, frame and said, “Thank you. I really needed that.”

Seunghyun rubbed Jiyong’s back as a strange sound broke the silence.

Jiyong giggled and looked up, “Way to ruin a moment.”

“Hey I can’t control my stomach and I told you we needed to order food.”

“Alright, come on, let’s call the place down the road again.”

Seunghyun smiled like a little kid. “You order and I’ll pick out a movie.” Jiyong rolled his eyes and went to grab the takeout menu that was taped to the fridge as Seunghyun ran over to the tv stand.

After the food arrived they sat on the couch and watched the movie the older man had pick out, relaxing for the rest of the night and forgetting their worries about the rest of the week.


	24. Chapter 24

The photo shoot spanned across three days and consisted of 30 different outfits including formal, casual and beach wear. The days were long and hot as they moved all over the Island taking hundreds of photos. Jiyong was lost in his work as he bounced around the models and directed their movements, leaving thoughts of Seunghyun in the back of his mind.

They agreed before he left that the older man would wait until Thursday night to fly in, so they wouldn’t be seen together, and Jiyong hoped that they had kept this trip a big enough secret that Seunghyun could come to Jeju unnoticed by fans and paparazzi.

At the end of the second day a couple of the models wanted to go out to eat with everyone and Jiyong didn’t have the heart to say no when Seungri came running up to him begging to go. So by 8 o’clock they had a group of 15, all sitting around a huge table, talking and enjoying their meal. As usual, Seungri was talking to some of the models, hanging on every word, which left Jiyong at the other end of the table, talking to the hair and makeup artists, as well as some of the older models, one of which he had worked with on several occasions in America.

She leaned over and whispered to him, “Seungri never changes, does he?”

He laughed. “No, I can’t say that he will ever change actually.”

“You should at least warn the girls about him.”

“Why? It’s so funny to watch him fawn over the models, thinking he has a chance with them, when they all think he’s gay.”

Everyone on their end of the table roared out laughing as they looked in Seungri’s direction. The young man whipped his head around to see what the fuss was about.

“Jiyong what did you say?”

“Nothing that wasn’t true,” he replied as he waved him off. Seungri glared at him but then went right back to talking to the model on his left, Jiyong turning as well to resume talking to his old friend.

“You seem happier than the last time I saw you in America. You must be liking it a lot better here in Korea,” she said.

Jiyong nodded but then felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Pulling it out he saw a message from Seunghyun saying how he was counting down the seconds until they saw each other again. He rolled his eyes at how cheesy it was but he couldn’t fight the smile that made its way across his face.

When he looked up to continue talking, he saw her staring at him with an eyebrow raised and a smirk on her face.

“Are you not telling me something? Have you met someone?”

Jiyong had an intense feeling of déjà vu as this conversation started sounding like the one he had with Youngbae while he was in New York, but this time he wasn’t going to give many details. They were friends, but not as close as he and Youngbae are.

“Yeah I have a boyfriend, we’ve been seeing each other for about two- no three months now…”

“And… What’s his name?”

He shook his head, not wanting to answer. “I don’t mean to be impolite, but we like to keep it private.”

“I take it he’s famous then?” Jiyong didn’t move. “Ahh that’s it, he’s famous but probably not out yet. No worries, I won’t ask anything more.” He gave her a small grateful smile as they dropped the conversation and joined in with the others that were going on at the table. But Jiyong only pretended to listen, his mind had gone astray as soon as he had seen that text from Seunghyun. Even if he was nervous about their time together this weekend, he couldn’t wait for him to get here.

 

 

The next day passed by in a blur for him. Everyone had woken up at 4 a.m. so they could get set up to take a couple sunrise shots before they really started taking the beachwear pictures. The hotel they were staying at had a small private beach for their VIP guests to use so they wouldn’t be disturbed. It was convenient and it let them run back to their rooms if they needed anything.

By noon the sun was blaring down on them and everyone had shed as much clothing as possible in order to stay cool. The heat started to take a toll on Jiyong as he noticed himself getting frustrated more than usual with the models, or maybe he was to blame, but he just couldn’t get the shots he wanted. He looked around and decided that since they were slightly ahead of schedule they should just take their lunch break early.

“Guys it’s almost 12:30, so why don’t we stop and meet back up at 2?” he asked as he looked around. Everyone was relieved and quickly started gathering thing together and putting it under the small tent that they had set up. Jiyong handed his camera to Seungri who took it and handed him a small hand towel in return to wipe the sweat that seemed to be covering him from head to toe.

“Thanks.” He brought the towel up to his forehead. “Hey I’m going to run up to my room and take a quick shower. You know I hate being like this.” He pulled at his shirt as much as he could but the sweat soaked fabric stuck to his skin. “Keep an eye on my equipment, if I find one grain of sand in anything-“

“Don’t worry, I got it. Just go take a shower,” Seungri yelled back, shaking his head as he walked to the tent.

Jiyong rolled his eyes and made his way up the beach and back to the hotel. He was too busy using the towel to wipe his brow to notice that another person was standing off to his left as he walked along the path.

“Wow, only a few days and I become invisible to you.” A deep voice said. A familiar voice that sent shivers down the young man’s spine as soon as he heard it.

“Seunghyun! What are you doing here?” He looked around just to make sure no other ears were listening in on their conversation. “You weren’t suppose to get here for another couple hours!” Jiyong said as he went to go give his boyfriend a hug but he remembered how gross he was from being out in the sun. “Sorry I’d hug you but I don’t think you’d want to be covered in my sweat. It’s been really hot out there today.” He hiked a thumb over his shoulder, pointing back down toward the beach.

Seunghyun ignored his remarks about his appearance and gave the younger man a quick hug.

“If you think I’d skip a chance to hug after not seeing you for three days, you’re mistaken.”

Jiyong smiled at his words. “I’m headed to my room, wanna come with me?”

“You move fast. I just got here and you already want me locked up in your hotel room.” The younger man playfully hit him on the shoulder as he walked past, making his way to the hotel entrance. “I’m just taking a quick shower.”

Running to catch up with his retreating boyfriend, Seunghyun said, “Shower sounds nice, I think I’ll join you.”

Jiyong stopped in his tracks and stared at the man, who proceeded to burst out laughing. “Calm down, I’m just kidding,” he whispered into his ear as he ruffled his hair. Jiyong relaxed at the familiar touch and they made their way to his room, both with smiles on their faces, happy to be finally reunited.

 

 

Seunghyun was propped up on the bed, leaning against the headboard, flipping through channels while he waited for Jiyong to get out of the shower. He needed the TV as a distraction because all he could think about was the fact that his boyfriend was naked with only a wall dividing them. Butterflies had been flying around in his stomach ever since the plane took off this morning and they only got worse as he heard the water from the shower turn on a few moments ago.

A couple minutes later, he was jerked out of his thoughts as he saw movement in the corner of his eye. Looking over, all thought left him and his breath caught in his throat as he saw Jiyong coming out of the bathroom wearing only a towel, that was riding low on his waist, exposing his hips bones. The younger man’s typically creamy skin was spotted red from the heat of the shower and the ends of his hair were wet, sticking to the sides of his face. No matter how many times he had seen Jiyong shirtless, even if he could count them on one hand, Seunghyun would always be in awe of his beauty.

The lines of Jiyong’s back guided Seunghyun’s eyes as he followed the curve of his spine downward. He saw the muscles move under his skin, showing off how fit he was, leaving the older man’s fingers itching with want. Jiyong held the towel at his waist as he walked into the room, his pale thigh exposing itself as the slit in the cloth parted. Seunghyun’s head was suddenly filled with images of those legs wrapped around him.

Jiyong must not have noticed his boyfriend’s sudden frozen state because he immediately went to his luggage and picked out something to wear. He pulled out two pairs of swim trunks, turned around and held them up as he asked “Which one should I wear?” But then saw Seunghyun and quickly changed his question. “What? What’s wrong?”

The only thing the older man could do to keep his sanity was get up and capture Jiyong’s lips.

“What was that for?”

Seunghyun shook his head and chuckled. “You really don’t know the things you do to me, do you?”

Jiyong stared at him blankly, eyes wide in confusion. Leaning back down to kiss him a second time, Seunghyun brought his arms up and wrapped them around the smaller man's form, finally allowing himself to touch his soft, exposed skin. He felt Jiyong shiver at his touch as he ran his hand up and down his spine.

“Hmmm that feels nice,” the younger man hummed against his neck. Seunghyun moved his hands further down and was suddenly reminded about Jiyong only wearing a towel at the moment.

“You should get dressed. They’re waiting for you downstairs.”

Jiyong groaned, “Work… why did you have to remind me… I like it better up here.”

“You and me both, but the faster you get done, the quicker we can be back up here.”

Slithering out of their embrace the younger man said, “Alright alright, I’m going. But you still haven’t answered my question. Which pair of swim trunks should I wear?”

Seunghyun laughed, “The red ones.”

 

 

They parted after Jiyong got dressed, Seunghyun saying that he would roam around the resort while they finished up with the shoot, which took less time to finish than they thought.

While everyone was packing up, Jiyong felt his phone vibrate and took it out to read a message from his boyfriend.

_Look to your right_

He turned to see a figure standing several yards away wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses, giving a small wave of his arms and then pointed to the phone in his hand as he brought up to his ear. Feeling vibrations once again, Jiyong looked down and saw that Seunghyun was calling him.

“Hello.”

“Hey, are you guys done? It looks like you’re packing up?”

“Yeah we are.”

“Do you think you can escape and join me for a walk down the beach?”

Jiyong looked around at all the staff and saw that basically everything was put away. “Give me a sec.” He hung up, going over to Seungri, telling him to just take all of the equipment up to his room and he would stop by and get it later, and then made his way to Seunghyun.

 

 

Walking along the deserted beach with his boyfriend was a very peaceful experience for Jiyong. Hearing the waves crash along the shore and feeling the warm breeze helped him finally relax after past couple days of chaos. His footsteps kept time with the rhythm of the waves, alongside Seunghyun, as they held hands and walked in silence. As another gust of wind blew past them, Jiyong felt his worries of the days to come, go with it.

Before he left for Jeju, he was nervous and scared about what this trip would mean for both of them, but right now, as he walked hand in hand down the beach with the person he loved, he let those nerves melt away. He knew that no matter what happened, he was looking forward to it. The next step in their relationship.

Even though Jiyong was enjoying the quiet, Seunghyun was getting restless. Breaking the younger man from his thoughts, Seunghyun nudged him with his shoulder and caused him to sidestep into a small puddle. They had taken their flip flops off earlier, carrying them in their hands that weren’t laced together, and because of their bare feet, Jiyong was ankle deep in sea water.

“Really?” he glared at Seunghyun. “I was trying to avoid the water.”

Seunghyun flashed him a playful smile. Jiyong was still a little pissed but thought, _Well two can play this game,_ as he used his soaked foot to flick water onto his boyfriend.

As soon as he felt the droplets on his skin, Seunghyun ripped his hand out of Jiyong’s and started running down the beach, trying to avoid getting wet.

“Oh no, you started this…” The younger man yelled as he ran after him.

Jiyong felt like a little kid again as Seunghyun and him got into a water fight, splashing and chasing each other, but when the older man suddenly cried out in pain and dropped to his knees in the water he knew something was wrong.

Panic taking over, Jiyong ran to him, grabbing to help him stand while he tried to see what had happened.

“What is it? What’s wrong?”

He looked down and saw a small line of red mixing with the water that was coming from Seunghyun’s foot. The older man leaned onto Jiyong, using him to balance himself as he brought his injured foot up to examine it.

“I think I cut myself on a shell or something.”

“Can you walk on it?”

Seunghyun put his foot down in the sand but immediately brought it back up, releasing a gasp of pain. “No I don’t think so, at least not on my own.”

Without skipping a beat, Jiyong threw his boyfriends arm over his shoulder and wrapped his arm around his waist so he could help him walk back to the hotel as he said, “Let’s go get it washed up before it gets infected. I don’t want to spend this entire weekend taking care of an injured boyfriend.”

It took them about 20 minutes to make it back up to Jiyong’s room, with Seunghyun apologizing every inch of the way. Jiyong kept telling him it was all right but the older man must’ve thought he ruined their whole weekend.

They hobbled their way into the bathroom and Jiyong helped Seunghyun sit on the edge of the tub and then pulled the shower head down to start cleaning him up. The cut wasn’t deep but it wasn’t small either, just a fine red line stretching across the width of his foot. Jiyong quickly found out that his boyfriend was very ticklish as he tried brushing off some of the sand from the injured foot, but eventually Seunghyun had had enough.

“You know what, I’m just going to take a shower.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his room key. “Here take this, room 715, grab my suitcase and bring it down here so I’ll have a change of clothes for when I get out.”

“Are you sure you’ll be okay to stand for that long?”

“Yeah I’ll be fine.”

Jiyong nodded and left the room, but not before he got a glimpse of Seunghyun taking his shirt off, making his stomach do flips as he made his way up to the elevator.

 

 

Quite literally hopping out of the shower several minutes later, Seunghyun saw some folded up clothes on the counter that Jiyong must have left him. He fumbled putting them on, but didn’t have as hard a time, his foot in much less pain now that the bleeding had stopped, and eventually opened the door.

Looking over to the bed he saw Jiyong curled up on top of the covers, fast asleep, the past couple of days catching up with him. He found that he could put some pressure on his foot and quietly “walked” over and laid down next to him. He tried not to wake him up but realized he had failed in his plan as the younger man turned over and in a sleepy voice asked, “How are you feeling?”

Seunghyun wrapped an arm around him as they nestled together. “Better. The shower really helped.”

“There’s some bandages right there on the bedside table,” he replied, pointing in the direction they were in. “I called the front desk and they brought them up while you were still in the shower.”

“Thank you.” Seunghyun kissed the top of Jiyong’s head and then leaned back onto the pillow, closing his eyes. “But I think you had a good idea of taking a nap.”

The younger man rubbed his nose against Seunghyun’s neck then jostled around a bit as he made his way under the covers. The older man followed suit, joining him underneath the cozy blankets, and pulled him back into his arms. Their legs intertwined with each other, but Jiyong whispered, “Am I going to hurt your foot?”

Seunghyun shook his head and leaned down to place a soft kiss on Jiyong’s lips. A tingling sensation filled the younger man as he felt his lips pressed against his boyfriends, which caused him to press more into the kiss.

Passion quickly filled them as their lips parted and tongues slid against each other. Their cuddling turning into a fervent makeout session in mere seconds. Hands exploring each other’s bodies. Small moans being heard. Rustling of sheets.

Seunghyun rolled over, trapping the younger man underneath, as he grinded his hips into him. He felt Jiyong's growing hardness against his own and groaned at the feel of friction they created. Opening his eyes, Seunghyun looked down at his boyfriend and saw the aftermath of their actions flushed over his face. He leaned down and placed a small peck on his lips as his stomach started doing flips at the thought of the question he was about to ask.

“Do you want to… continue? I know it’s random… and not very romantic… but right here… right now… it feels right. And that’s all that should matter. But only if you feel it too.”

Jiyong took a second as he stared at Seunghyun, seeing every line and detail of the man that he loved. Bringing up his hand to the older man’s hair, he ran his fingers through it, feeling the dampness left over from the shower and said, “I’ve never cared about where, or how romantic it should be… I’ve just wanted you… nothing else.” He leaned up and kissed him, making sure that Seunghyun understood that he was telling him yes, he was ready.

 

 

Clothes quickly found their way to the floor as they both started exploring each other’s bodies. Their final barriers falling as they gave into their need. Lips slid against heated skin as Seunghyun moved his way down Jiyong’s body. His hands slowly spreading the younger mans legs and then moving up to tickle the flesh on the inside of his thigh.

A shiver ran down Jiyong’s spine as he felt Seunghyun’s fingers get closer to his hardening cock. When the warmth finally wrapped around him, he released a whimper, feeling the older man stroke his length.

Seunghyun pressed his lips to Jiyong’s and quickened his pace, the man’s erection growing in his hand. After a few more strokes, the older man stopped and moved his fingers down to find the younger mans small rim of muscle.

He knew that it had been a long time since Jiyong had been intimate with anyone, so he slowly massaged the entrance and then pushed the tip of his finger in.

“Ahh,” Jiyong gasped at the sting.

“Sorry.”

“No its okay, keep going.”

So Seunghyun did, eventually getting his whole finger inside of the younger man, and slowly pumped it in and out. He added another finger when Jiyong was ready, stretching him, and making sure he wouldn’t feel that much pain when _he_ would finally enter him. After a few minutes, Jiyong started making sounds and moving his hips in time with Seunghyun’s hand, until he stuttered, “S-Seunghyun please… I want you.”

He looked into the younger man’s eyes, seeing passion, love and lust all mixed together, and then leaned down to kiss him, as he removed his fingers. His lips vibrated as Jiyong moaned at the feeling to the retreating fingers. Propping himself up he said “Hold on a sec”, getting up, he grabbed lube from the suitcase Jiyong had retrieved from his room, along with a condom, and then made his way back to his boyfriend, straddling his waist.

Jiyong reached up and took the condom out of the older man’s hands, wanting to put it on him. When Seunghyun felt Jiyong's fingers envelop his cock he gasped, only to be silenced by the younger man's lips as he pulled him into a kiss, while he rolled the condom on to his length. Jiyong gave his cock a couple strokes, hardening him more, and then let his hand fall as he leaned back on his elbows, waiting for Seunghyun.

Flipping open the cap, the older man squeezed lube into the palm of his hand and spread it along himself, making sure he was slick enough to slide into Jiyong’s awaiting entrance. Tossing the bottle to the side, Seunghyun leaned down and kissed Jiyong on the lips and moved down along his neck as his hands spread the man’s legs further apart.

“You ready?”

“More than ever.”

And with that, little by little, Seunghyun entered Jiyong.

The younger man’s hand clawed at his back at the feeling of being stretched, but after a while he got used to Seunghyun’s size. With small, slow thrusts, they started building a pace, but apparently it was too slow for him.

Jiyong rolled them over and released a small hiss as Seunghyun slipped out of him in the process. The older man was in awe at the sight above him. Jiyong, his beautiful, breathtaking boyfriend, had his blonde hair tousled in every direction and face flushed red from their activity. But what got Seunghyun’s heart racing the most was the pure lust that was in his eyes as he sat on top of him, panting, his lips swollen red.

The younger man looked down at him and moved his hands to massage their way up Seunghyun’s chest. Seunghyun, wanting to have the feeling of Jiyong’s warmth wrapped around him again, lifted the man up. Knowing what he was trying to do, Jiyong removed one of his hands and used it to guide his boyfriends cock back inside him.

Jiyong threw his head back and let out a small whine as he sunk down, letting Seunghyun’s length reach deeper inside him than before. It took all of the older man’s will power to not buck his hips up into him, because he knew that they both wanted to take this slow, enjoying the moment as they physically felt every ounce of love for each other.

The younger man started rolling his hips and moved his hands back onto Seunghyun chest, using it as leverage to push himself up the tiniest bit and then dropping down.

“Fuck Ji…” Seunghyun moaned, watching the man repeat the movement again. Jiyong’s mouth hung open as he lifted himself higher and slammed back down onto the larger man, gasping as he felt the hard cock glide in and out of him.

As his pace started picking up, Seunghyun moved his hands and grasped the smaller mans waist, trying to help him lift his body up and down.

“O-oh god!” Jiyong groaned, feeling the tip of his boyfriends length hit his prostate. “Hnnn… again,” he said, and leaned down to meld their lips together. He ran his hands up to cup Seunghyun’s face, while he grinded into him, feeling his own erection get some much needed friction as it rubbed between their stomachs.

The older man jerked his hips up making Jiyong sigh in his ear and that only stimulated him more, so he did it again and again, and with every thrust the sound from Jiyong increased in volume.

“Yes… yes… Seunghyun…”

Jiyong moved his hands to the side, clutching the sheets beside his boyfriend as he met thrust after thrust with the man below him. He could tell that Seunghyun was getting tired as his rhythm started faltering, and he too was starting to feel the burn in his tiring muscles.

He paused for a second, trying to give his legs a rest when he heard the man below him speak up. “J-Jiyong… fuck… I’m close.”

“Me too… I just… my legs…”

Not wasting any more time, Seunghyun grabbed onto Jiyong’s thighs and flipped them over once more and pushed him into the mattress. The younger man wrapped his legs around him as he started moving his hips more, driving into Jiyong with rejuvenated passion.

“God fuck yes…ha-harder.”

Seunghyun obliged, pulling out almost all the way and slamming back into him. The smaller man’s pleas were becoming louder and more aggressive as he raked his hands along Seunghyun’s back, trying to pull the man as close to him as possible while their bodies slid against each other. He felt the man’s hot breath above him, caressing its way across his face and then down to his neck as Seunghyun brought his mouth to it and started biting him softly.

Jiyong arms flew out to his sides at the feeling of his boyfriends teeth on his neck, and he turned his head to give him more access. Touching every curve of the smaller man’s torso, Seunghyun slid his hands up his body and along his arms. Jiyong moved them above his head and the older man’s hands followed as their breathless ecstasy filled the room.

Seunghyun’s fingers laced themselves in Jiyong’s while he brought his head down to kiss him, the younger man’s bottom lip already hiding behind his teeth as he tried to in hold in his moans. But as soon as he felt Seunghyun’s lips he opened his mouth welcoming the taste of his boyfriend.

Their joined hands gripped each other tighter, nails digging into skin, as Jiyong raised his hips meeting Seunghyun’s continuous thrusts. The older man let out a growl as he felt him start to clench around his length.

“Hmm… Ji.”

“Seun-Seunghyun.”

They called out each other’s names as Jiyong welcomed his toe curling, knee shaking, blissful orgasm. Feeling Jiyong squeeze around him, Seunghyun plunged into him a few more times and then finally felt his release.

Worn out, he fell to the left side of his boyfriend and both of them laid on the bed, gasping for breath as they reveled in every tingling sensation that filled their bodies.

With the sound of sheets ruffling, Jiyong rolled over and wedged his way under the older man’s arm, resting his head on his shoulder. Seunghyun mindlessly started combing through the man’s blonde sweat slicked hair as Jiyong brought his hand up and rested it on his chest.

The younger man gave a small chuckle.

“What?”

“Hmmm…. Nothing…”

“That chuckle doesn’t mean ‘nothing’. What is it?” he asked.

“Your heartbeat… it's beating faster than I’ve ever felt…”

Seunghyun smiled and leaned down to kiss Jiyong’s forehead, remembering their conversation before they left for Jeju, “Only you can make it do that.”

He rolled onto his side, pulling Jiyong into an embrace, chest to chest, and for the first time he noticed that his boyfriend’s heart was beating just as fast. Beat by beat, they were perfectly in sync. Two hearts, two bodies and two souls, joining as one.


	25. Chapter 25

Seunghyun had never been one to believe in _the afterglow_ that a lot of people talked about. He knew from the few sexual encounters that he had before, that you do experience that orgasm high right after the fact, but he never once saw someone’s bliss manifest itself physically. That is, until he woke up the next morning and saw the sleeping man beside him.

Call it looking through rose colored glasses, lost in love, or whatever else you could think of, but he genuinely saw a brightness to Jiyong’s soft, relax features. From the rose colored tint in his cheeks, to the creamy pale skin of his bare chest, there was no doubt that Jiyong was glowing in Seunghyun’s eyes.

Smiling to himself, he left his arm stay draped over his boyfriend's waist, but gripped him a little tighter. He watched as Jiyong’s eyes moved beneath his lids, lost in a dream Seunghyun could only hope he was a part of. His red lips trembled unspoken words and brows furrowed in some unknown frustration. He brought his finger up and gently placed it between the younger man’s furrowing brows, trying to smooth down the bundle of wrinkles, and watched as the touch seemed to calm Jiyong immediately. The younger man then rolled onto his side facing Seunghyun, and snuggled closer, all while still off in dreamland.

Seunghyun welcomed his warmth and wrapped his arms around him, drawing him closer, meshing their bodies together. He heard Jiyong hum at the movements and for a second he thought he had woken him, but he then felt the slow patter of his breathing against his neck that told him Jiyong was still asleep.

He laid there for another hour, falling in and out of sleep, until he felt Jiyong start to stir more in his arms. Sliding his hands down the contours of his waist, Seunghyun’s hand rested on the younger man’s hip and he started drawing patterns with his fingers.

“Hmmm… that tickles…” Jiyong murmured into Seunghyun’s neck, sleep still very much present in his voice.

Seunghyun stilled his hand but then Jiyong released a small whimper so he continued tickling the smooth skin. Jiyong smiled into his neck and wrapped his arms around the older man while leading small trail of kisses up to his ear.

“Morning love…”

A shiver went down Seunghyun’s spine as he heard the words fall effortlessly out of his boyfriends mouth. What he would give to wake up to that phrase every day.

“Morning.” He leaned down and placed a small chaste kiss on his lips, but it was Jiyong who leaned into it more, deepening it

Seunghyun’s senses sparked back to life as the kiss continued. He tried pulling away for a second but Jiyong grabbed a hold of him, not wanting to part from him just yet. When they eventually separated Seunghyun commented, “Well you sure are an eager little thing this morning.”

Jiyong gave a small mischievous giggle and whispered very pointedly into his ear, “You know I’m not _little._

Seunghyuns breath caught in his throat from not just the comment his boyfriend made but also for the fact that said boyfriend was currently moving his hand down towards his length.

Jiyong giggled again. “See I told ya.”

Now moving his hand of his own accord, Seunghyun reached to grasp the slowly hardening cock in his hand, but Jiyong quickly pushed him onto his back and laid on top of him. Waving his index finger in front of his face, the younger man tutted at him and said, “No no no. This morning, I’m going to give you something that’s been due to you for a while now.”

Seunghyun looked questioningly at Jiyong, not understanding what he meant.

“Remember the night I came back from New York?”

He nodded but still didn’t understand.

“Remember what took place on your couch?”

“How could I forget that? But what did you mean by ‘something that’s been due to you’?”

Jiyong rolled his eyes as he realized he was just going to have to be blunt about it. Sometimes he couldn’t believe how slow his boyfriend was.

“After you gave me the blowjob, you were still hard. I offered to take care of it but you just said to forget about it and that you wanted to sleep. So this is me trying to give you your I.O.U.”

“Oh…”

Jiyong flashed him a wicked smile as he started scooting down Seunghyun’s body and let his hands do the rest of the talking for him as he started stroking the older man’s hardening length.

 

Several minutes later, they were both spent from their activities. Jiyong giving Seunghyun the best blowjob he had ever experienced, and in turn he jerked him off, not wanting to have any more I.O.U’s left between them.

“Damn,” Seunghyun huffed as he fell back on to the pillow

“Yeah…” Jiyong panted and then mimicked his boyfriend’s position on his own pillow.

“I really lucked out… I found a boyfriend who has a very, very talented tongue.”

“And here I thought you like me for my personality and cute face.” Jiyong chided.

Seunghyun turned over and pulled him into hug as he breathlessly said, “You know I love for everything that you are.”

Jiyong chuckled. “I love you.” And then brought his lips up to meet Seunghyun’s for a simple kiss.

Once they peeled their sweat slicked bodies away from each other, Seunghyun suggested they jump in the shower, but Jiyong just laughed saying, “If we continue doing this we’ll never leave this room.”

“Is that such a bad thing?”

“Well we need to eat. And then there’s the fact that there’s a whole beautiful island outside our window waiting for us to explore together.”

“Fine… Do you want to take a shower first?”

“No you go ahead. I’ll order us some breakfast.”

“Mmm breakfast… I want belgian waffles with strawberries and whipped cream.”

“I said breakfast not dessert.”

“That is breakfast,” he pouted.

“Ok okay, Mr. Sweet tooth get in the shower and I’ll go order.”

Seunghyun flash him a brilliant smile as he kissed him on the cheek and untangled himself from the sheets, making his way to the bathroom.

 

Jiyong placed their order and then waited for Seunghyun to get out of the shower. He busied himself by picking out an outfit for the day and by the time he was satisfied with his choice, his boyfriend was walking out of the steaming room.

“The food should be here in a few minutes,” he said as he gently kissed Seunghyun on the cheek as they passed each other, and then made his way to take his turn in the shower.

When he was finished he climbed out and wrapped a towel around himself and heard a knock at the door. He listened and heard Seunghyun open the door but he didn’t hear any cart or exchange of words. Curiosity got the best of him and he walked out to see what was going on.

“Seunghyun, is there something wrong-“

His words dropped just like his stomach had done the second he saw the man in the doorway.

“Seungri! What are you doing here?”

The young assistant was shell shocked as he looked between Seunghyun’s half dressed form and Jiyong’s naked, towel wrapped body.

“I-uh… I-I umm… Youdidn’tpickupyourcameraequpimentlastnightandIgotworried.” He blurted out in a rush. “But if I had known you had company-“ His eyes flicked to Seunghyun’s, “I would have called first.”

Jiyong’s skin was already red from his shower, but it was quickly becoming more so, now that Seungri had caught him and Seunghyun together.

“Here I’ll just leave this.” He wheeled a hardcase into the room and then abruptly turned on his heel and made his way out the door.

Before he could really think, Jiyong’s body moved on its own after his assistant.

“Seungri wait! Come back here.”

He didn’t stop.

“If you want to keep your job you’ll come back here right now.”

He saw him stop in the middle of the hallway and drop his shoulders in defeat. Keeping his eyes on the carpet, Seungri turned and made his way back towards his boss.

Jiyong ushered him inside and made him sit on the edge of the bed as he barked at his boyfriend. “Put a shirt on Seunghyun.”

Seunghyun eyes widened at the commanding voice and felt the room’s atmosphere tense up. He looked to Seungri who had brought his head up and was looking at him with a million questions running through his eyes.

“Seunghyun?” the young man asked to no one in particular.

Hearing his real name come from Seungri made him snap back to reality as he walked over to his open suit case and grabbed a shirt. Jiyong was rapidly throwing on the outfit he had picked out earlier and when he finished he pulled a chair over and sat it in front of his confused assistant.

“Look Seungri, what I’m about to say will never leave this room, okay?”

The young man nodded looking like a child who was about to get the biggest scolding of his life.

“Ok then…” Jiyong looked to Seunghyun really fast and took a deep breath as he faced Seungri once more. “You’ve known me for years. And you’ve known all those years that I’m gay. Well-”

“Wait! Wait wait wait!” Seungri exclaimed, waving his hands in front of his boss to silence him. “IknowaboutyourrealationshipwithVick!” he rushed out again.

Jiyong sat there in awe blinking, and then looked up to Seunghyun who had an equally confused expression.

“What did you say?” Jiyong questioned as he looked to Seungri.

The younger man let out a sigh as he slowly said, “I know that you and Vick have been dating these past couple months.”

“But- how… when?”

Seungri rolled his eyes and looked at Jiyong. “I may be a bumbling idiot sometimes but I’m not stupid. You’re like a brother to me so of course I knew. Plus Daesung and I have been hanging out and one night we got really drunk and he was complaining how you two had a lovers quarrel, which made Vick be an ass to him. And well… that sort of confirmed my suspicions. And I mean come on, you two have been inseparable since the gallery opening.”

Jiyong groaned and rubbed his hands over his face. He was glad that Seungri finally knew, or rather that he already knew about them, but he was worried that him and Seunghyun hadn’t been careful enough. He was pulled out of his thoughts though as Seungri spoke up again.

“But why did Jiyong call you Seunghyun, Vick?” He asked as he looked up at the man he was questioning.

Without skipping a beat Seunghyun said, “Because it’s my real name. Surely you didn’t think Vick was my real name did you?”

The younger man's cheeks flushed as he mumbled to himself, “Well you never know these day’s… people can have all kinds of weird names.”

Seunghyun quietly laughed and clapped the young man on the shoulder. “Its okay. Vick is my stage name, Seunghyun is my real name. And only Daesung, Jiyong, you and a few others know it. So keep it to yourself, okay?”

Seungri nodded but then became distracted when they all heard a knock at the door.

“Room Service,” said a muffled voice behind the door.

“Just a minute,” Jiyong called and then looked back to Seungri. “Look, Seunghyun and I are going to stay few more days together-“

Realization hit the young man. “That’s why you’re staying longer? I thought you said you wanted to spend personal time taking more photo’s of the Island. But I didn’t think it was this kind of _personal time._ ”

“Seungri…” Jiyong gave a warning in his voice.

“Ok I get.” He threw up his hands in surrender. “You two have fun on your honeymoon or whatever. I’ll get out of your hair. Just let me know if you need anything before I leave today.” He said as he stood to make his way out the door.

“Here take all my equipment back except this…” Jiyong pulled his camera and favorite lens out and handed the rest to his assistant.

Seungri looked up between Jiyong and Seunghyun and thought how well they looked together. He really was happy for Jiyong, he could tell how much they meant to each other.

“Oh ummm… Sorry for walking in on you guys.”

“No its okay, I’m just glad you took the news really well.” Jiyong smiled.

“Of course. Now I know to call from now on because I don’t want to be seeing anything that would scar me for life.” He shuddered at some mental image he created in his head.

“Trust me, you would hear it before you see it…” Seunghyun blatantly stated as he wrapped an arm around Jiyong’s waist, pulling him closer.

Jiyong and Seungri both froze and turned bright red.

Seunghyun laughed at them. “Come on we don’t want our breakfast getting cold. See ya later Seungri,” he said as he moved forward and let the man leave, making way for Room Service to come in. He tipped the serviceman and then rolled the cart over to the small table in the corner of their room and started spreading out their food. He looked up to see Jiyong still in the same spot.

“Jiyong come on. Eat.”

The younger man turned around, still beet red, and grumbled, “I cannot believe you just said that to Seungri.”

“What? That you’re loud in bed?” he innocently said as he shoved a forkful of waffle into his mouth. “I was just stating a fact…”

Jiyong rubbed his hands over his face. “I swear I could just kill you sometimes…”

“The feeling’s mutual. Now get your cute ass over here and eat. You said it yourself that you want to go exploring today.”

Jiyong rolled his eyes and chuckled, deciding to give in. He could tell, even with this small banter between them, that this weekend was going to be everything that he’d hope for and so much more.


	26. Chapter 26

Jiyong rested his head in his left hand while his right was preoccupied with using his fork to push around his remaining scrambled eggs on the plate. Seunghyun had been watching him play with his food for the past five minutes and finally he had had enough.

“Are you still mad about my comment to Seungri?” His stomach started churning as he waited for Jiyong’s answer, he really didn’t want to fight with his boyfriend the morning after they just had sex.

“No… it’s not that…” Jiyong left his comment hanging in the air while he stabbed the rubbery piece of egg for the hundredth time.

Carefully Seunghyun leaned over and stilled Jiyong’s hand, making him set the fork down, and took the younger man’s hand in his.

“Please tell me what’s on your mind. You’re starting to worry me.”

“It’s just…” Jiyong looked up at Seunghyun. “The whole thing with Seungri got me thinking…”

“About?”

“Us… Our relationship… Our _private_ relationship.”

Seunghyun’s heart stopped. Did Jiyong want to make their relationship public? He knew his boyfriend didn’t hide the fact that he was gay to everyone else, but no one knew that _he_ was, and he wanted to keep it that way, at least for a while longer. All their “public” dates, if any one really noticed them and who they were, would’ve thought that two friends or business partners were out eating together. Jiyong knew going into this relationship that it was supposed to be hush hush and although they never really had a “talk” about it, it was always an unspoken thing between them.

“A-Are you wanting to make it less private?”

Jiyong could see the sudden panic in Seunghyun’s face and tried to quickly reassure him. “No no no, that’s not what I meant. Actually the opposite. I know and understand that we can’t make our relationship public, not just because your celebrity status-“

“Hey you’re famous too…” Seunghyun interjected.

“Yes but most people outside the industry don’t know me or what I look like. You on the other hand are in the public eye more than me, people will recognize you. Anyway, what I’m trying to get at is… maybe we should be extra careful from now on. Keep the physical contact down to a minimum in public, be careful about what we say… you know stuff like that.”

Seunghyun nodded as he took in what his boyfriend was saying. With his other relationships, or flings more like it, he didn’t have to worry about this stuff because he wasn’t in love with any of those guys so he would never meet them in public. But Jiyong… he loved him and it physically hurt to know that he wouldn’t be able to hold hands or give him a peck on the cheek whenever he wanted to.

Seeing Seunghyun’s dejected face, Jiyong wanted to quickly change the mood. He shook their joined hands to get his attention, “Hey, just because we have to tone it down out there…“ He nodded towards the window. “Doesn’t mean we have to tone it down-“ Jiyong brought Seunghyun’s hand across the table and placed it over his heart. “In here.”

Seunghyun felt the fast beating beneath the shirt and smiled as he looked up at Jiyong.

“Just always remember that no matter how far apart we’ll seem outside, by the end of the day we will always come back to each other.”

Without saying anything, Seunghyun got up and walked around the table to Jiyong. He took the younger man’s face in his hands as he leaned down and brought their lips together. The soft pressure made Jiyong’s toes curl and lean into the kiss more. He could feel every ounce of love, longing, and utter sincerity in just one kiss from Seunghyun. He felt Seunghyun’s tongue play with the seam of his mouth and all he could do was part his lips welcoming the intrusion. He heard the passion they had for each other in every miniscule sound that escaped them while their lips and tongues passed over one another.

It was this kind of act that would always make Jiyong speechless in front of Seunghyun. The older man had this gentleness tucked away deep inside him, and all the air would leave his lungs whenever he would bring it out, because he would only do so for him and him alone. Only he knew this tender, loving, adoring side of Seunghyun and all he could hope for was that Seunghyun knew just how much he loved him in return.

Seunghyun pulled back and kneeled down in front of Jiyong, his chest rising and falling to catch his breath. He grabbed a hold of Jiyong’s hand again and kept his eyes focused on it as he spoke.

“For every minute of every day that we have to be in the public eye together, please always remember this moment… that kiss… because for every second I’m with you, I want to do it again and again. And know, that no matter what happens in the future, remember that I will always love you. You have always been a special part of my life, even when we were kids, and I want you to continue to be a special part of my life. I won’t let you disappear from my side ever again.”

He finally looked up to Jiyong and saw a faint streak of wetness running down his cheek. He brought his thumb up, wiping it dry, and smiled at Jiyong’s water filled eyes.

“Are you okay?” Seunghyun asked.

Jiyong sniffled and brought his hands up to clear his eyes as he nodded. “Yeah… I’m okay. I just…” He pressed the heels of his palms in his eyes, trying to make himself stop crying and took a deep ragged breath. “I sometimes get so overwhelmed with how much love you give me and I just hope that you know I love more than anything. Although I might verbalize it as much as you-“ His voice cracked with emotion. He sniffled again and took another shaky breath as he tried to find his voice to continue.

“Jiyong, you never have to say it out loud for me to know.” Seunghyun interjected in the younger man’s pause. “I feel it every time you look at me… every time you touch me… like last night. That was the best night of my life… because I spent it with you and you showed me how much you loved me. Not with words but with your body, and that’s all I could ever ask for. I’m always getting words of praise and adoration from people, so it means so much more to me when I can actually _feel_ your love instead of hearing it.”

A small awkward chuckle escaped Jiyong's lips as he calmed down some more. “So you never want to hear me say that I love you?” He asked, giving Seunghyun a slight smile.

“I didn’t say that I never want to hear it…” He pouted.

Jiyong’s smile spread across his face as he slid out of his chair and tackled Seunghyun to the floor, wrapping his arms around his neck. Both of them erupted into laughter as Jiyong scattered kisses all over Seunghyun’s face, saying “I love you” in between each one. After about 100 I love you’s, Jiyong placed his lips firmly against Seunghyun’s and let them linger there for a few moments, then grazed his lips down his jaw, and snuggled into his neck.

Seunghyun smiled and rolled them onto their sides, arms still wrapped tightly around one another. “If you do that at least once a week, I think I’ll be okay for the rest of the time.” He felt the vibrations of Jiyong’s laugh against his chest, and then he pulled away to look at him once more.

“Deal.” Jiyong said and pecked Seunghyun on the lips one last time before he untangled himself from him and stood. He looked down and offered his hand to his boyfriend to help him up as well. “Come on, we have a long day ahead of us, so let’s get moving.”

 

 

“Are you sure you’re gonna be able to walk on your foot all day?” Jiyong asked Seunghyun as they rode down in the elevator together.

“Yeah I’ll be fine, it’s really not as bad as it seemed yesterday.”

Jiyong shrugged. “Well if it starts hurting just let me know and we can head back here to the hotel.”

Seunghyun wiggled his eyebrows. “If that’s all it takes-“ The elevator dinged and the doors opened up to the lobby. They both stepped out after five steps Seunghyun called out to Jiyong.

“Ji, owe my foot.”

Jiyong looked over to him and just rolled his eye as he shook his head on the way towards the front door.

Seunghyun ran and caught up to him. “What? You can’t blame a guy for trying.”

“You’re ridiculous.”

 

 

They caught a shuttle bus that took travelers from the hotel to Jeju city bus line that then took them to the Hallasan National Park. When they got off at their trail stop, Jiyong bounced up and down on the balls of his feet as he looked in every direction, snapping pictures. Seunghyun stood off to the side and thought how much he looked like a kid in a candy store and how he found it completely adorable.

Jiyong paused his picture taking so he could pull out a map from his camera bag. He studied it for a moment and then turned to his boyfriend, “Seunghyun come on, the trail leads this way.”

Seunghyun saw Jiyong’s smiling, excited face and could not resist following the younger man, as they made their way down the path and taking in all the sights.

The park was simply beautiful, Seunghyun thought. Huge wide open fields full of wildflowers that lead to large mountains in the distance. The colors were vibrant and captivating, but the best part about the whole thing was that he was spending time with Jiyong. When they first arrived, they got off the bus with a few other travelers, but since Jiyong likes to take his time taking pictures, everyone seemed to have gone on ahead and left them by themselves.

Seunghyun wasn’t complaining though, it just meant that he could kiss Jiyong and hold hands with him as they walked along the trail more. Every now and then Jiyong would insist on doing mini photo shoots with him as the model, claiming that they were for his personal collection.

“Well if you want a personal collection, I can give you a _very_ _personal_ _collection_.” Seunghyun mused as he started playing with the hem of his shirt, keeping a watching eye on Jiyong for his reaction.

“Seunghyun!” Jiyong whispered loud enough for the older man to hear as a bright blush covered his face, “What are you thinking? What if someone saw you.”

“Ji, there’s no one around except us. And plus I wasn’t really going to take my shirt off, I just wanted to see you flustered,” he said as he walked over and wrapped the photographer in his arms. “I love seeing you blush.” He leaned down and captured Jiyong’s mouth in a quick kiss and then pulled apart from him as he asked, “Ok, where do you want me to pose.”

Jiyong told Seunghyun to just act as if he was on a walk, enjoying the scenery. He took many photo’s of the older man mostly because he looked so relaxed and carefree today that he couldn’t pass up the opportunity.

Seunghyun also asked to take a few photo’s together on his cellphone, saying that he needed a new background. So of course they took the cheesiest and most typical couple photos you can imagine. After taking one of Jiyong kissing Seunghyun’s cheek while he wore a surprised look on his face, the younger man requested they reverse the pose so Seunghyun was kissing him on the cheek. Jiyong pulled out his phone to take that one and then quickly stole Seunghyun's phone and starting pressing things on each screen.

“There!” he said as he shoved both devices into the older mans face. “We now have ‘matching’ backgrounds. Except on mine you’re kissing me and on yours I’m kissing you. Couples phones,” he finished with a smile. Seunghyun stared at their phones and his heart swelled.

“Jiyong, you are too adorable for words,” Seunghyun said as he took his phone out of his hand and placed a small kiss on his lips. Jiyong smiled into the kiss and hummed at the taste of Seunghyun. So much for keeping the contact down to a minimum.

Another half hour of walking they made it to the rest area and stopped to buy a small lunch.

“I was thinking about stopping here and then making our way back to the bus stop because there’s somewhere else I want to go today,” Jiyong informed Seunghyun as they finished up eating.

Seunghyun nodded, “Anywhere is fine. Where are we going?”

“Manjanggul Cave.”

 

 

Making their way back to the bus stop they rode back into town and then took a taxi to the cave. On the ride over, Jiyong was flipping through the pictures he took at the park when he felt Seunghyun’s head rest on his shoulder. He looked down and saw that his boyfriend had completely fallen asleep, lips parted and chest rising in a steady rhythm. He let his camera rest in his lap as his hand slid over the top of Seunghyun’s thigh and his head leaning against the top of his head.

Finally arriving at the cave Jiyong jostled Seunghyun awake and they both got out and stretched.

“Have a nice nap?” Jiyong inquired.

“Yeah,” he yawned. “I did too much _strenuous activity_ last night and this morning and then someone decides it’s a good idea to go hiking on top of that.” Seunghyun raised a questioning eyebrow towards Jiyong. “My muscles are all stiff and sore.”

“Hey you said you wanted to come and I told you what we were going to be doing all day.”

“I know, I know. Just tell me that there isn’t as much walking in the cave tour as there was at the park.”

“No, there isn’t, don’t worry.” Jiyong walked over to whisper in Seunghyun’s ear. “If you’re lucky, you might just get a massage back at the hotel to work out those _stiff_ _muscles._ ” Jiyong’s tongue flick his ear as he said those words and a shiver ran down his spine.

“Well lets get this cave thing over with then and spend the rest of the day in the room.” Seunghyun said as he dragged Jiyong towards the entrance.

 

 

They joined a small tour group but found themselves constantly in the back because Jiyong was getting too distracted by the formations of rock and the lights that bounced off the walls of the cave. Some of the passages that they had to walk through were really tight, some of them they had to literally walk sideways, which tested Seunghyun’s slight claustrophobia.

Walking into a bigger chamber of the cave, the temperature suddenly dropped and caused Jiyong to start shivering.

“This thin shirt was not a good idea to wear into a cold cave.” He mumbled through chattering teeth.

Seunghyun chuckled, he brought both his hands up and started rubbing them up and down Jiyong’s bare arms trying to warm him up as he walked behind him. Jiyong tried to protest about how the people in the group could see but he just told him to be quiet and to pay attention to the tour guide as he droned on about the history of the cave for the hundredth time.

All of a sudden there was a loud squeaking sound from above them and people started gasping as they looked up to find the source. But what got Jiyong’s attention was not the reaction from the others but from the sudden tight grip Seunghyun currently had on his arms.

“Seunghyun… you’re starting to hurt me.” Jiyong whispered to the man behind him. He didn’t respond and didn’t loosen his grip. “Seunghyun, it’s just a couple of bats. Nothing to worry about.” He could hear the older man’s breathing start to become more pronounced as he took deep breathes. Jiyong used his hand and pried Seunghyun’s hand off his arm as he turned around to look at him.

“Are you okay?” He asked as he brought the same hand up to Seunghyun cheek to get his attention, that was currently on the darkness above them.

Seunghyun looked down and into Jiyong’s concerned eyes and with a shaky breath he finally said, “I just have a fear of bats…”

“Why didn’t you tell me? If I had known then we wouldn’t have come.”

“You wanted to and I wanted you to be happy.”

“Seunghyun…” Jiyong uttered in a worried voice.

“No its okay. I’ll be fine… I think. Just hold my hand until we get out, okay?”

Seeing how terrified he was, Jiyong slid his hand down to lace their fingers together. Another squeaking sounded from above and Jiyong thought Seunghyun was going to break his hand from squeezing so hard.

“Seunghyun, relax. I’m right here. Pay attention to me, never mind what’s up there, okay?” The older man nodded. “Now come on lets go. I think the tour is almost over.” Seunghyun took a deep breath and let Jiyong pull him forward to catch up with the rest of the group.

He was ready to have that massage now...


	27. Chapter 27

By the time they made it out of the cave, Jiyong had a perfect impression of Seunghyun’s hand on his. Although his boyfriend was clearly terrified of the small flying creatures that inhabited the cave, Jiyong could only find it adorable every time Seunghyun sucked in a breath or scooted closer to him when the bats squeaked or flew above them as they walked. Even fully grown men were allowed to be afraid of things.

When Seunghyun saw the light from the entrance of the cave he ripped his hand out of Jiyong’s and ran to it. Jiyong silently laughed at the action and kept walking his normal pace, making Seunghyun wait for him. By the time Jiyong exited he saw Seunghyun bent in half, his hand resting on his knees, as he tried to catch his breath.

“Seunghyun… are you sure you’re alright?” He asked, but he couldn’t completely mask the laughter in his voice.

“Ji, just give me a minute.”

Jiyong chuckled, he walked over to him and started rubbing his back. “It’s okay now. You’re out of the dark scary cave. No bats will come and get you,” he patronized.

Seunghyun looked up and glared at him. “Ha ha.” He replied with as much sarcasm as he could muster.

“Oh come on,” Jiyong said as he moved his hand up to Seunghyun’s shoulder and squeezed. “I promised you something for when we get back and by the looks of it you could really do with some loosening up.” He massaged Seunghyun’s neck, giving him a small preview of what awaited him back at the hotel.

Seunghyun shot straight up and pulled Jiyong towards the info center, as he took out his phone to call a taxi.

 

 

When they got back to the hotel, Seunghyun had to shove his hands in his pockets to keep them off of Jiyong. It was driving him up the wall that he wasn’t able to reach out and wrap his arm around his boyfriend, but Jiyong on the other hand was calm and collected as he looked over his camera.

Last night they finally had a taste for each other, but now Seunghyun felt like he was starving and needed the sweetness of Jiyong once again. Every second that he wasn’t touching Jiyong was complete torture, but from the looks of it, his boyfriend could care less. Jiyong hadn’t looked at him once since they got into the taxi and drove back to the hotel and all he wanted was to see just a small glimmer of excitement in his eyes to give him reassurance that he wasn’t the only one who was eager to get behind closed doors.

They rode up in the elevator in silence. Seunghyun leaned up against the cold metal corner of the small moving box while he burned holes in the back of Jiyong's head from staring at him. How could he be so composed, Seunghyun thought. Here he was replaying every single detail of last night in his head. The way Jiyong’s hands ghosted over his skin. The soft hitches of breath they each released. The heat and slickness of their bodies wrapping around each other. All of it was on repeat in his mind and he couldn’t wait to see what Act 2 would hold for them.

When the doors opened Jiyong stepped out slowly and made his way down the hall, Seunghyun followed behind him, still frustrated at lack of interaction. Arriving at their door Jiyong took his time to put his camera back in his bag and then took out the room key and slid it into the slot. By this point Seunghyun was so restless that he was bouncing on the balls of his feet and when Jiyong turned the handle on the door, he slammed it open and shoved the smaller man inside, all his patience flying out the window.

He threw his hat and sunglasses on the table and ran his hand through his hair while Jiyong put his camera bag down. As soon as he saw it leave his hands, Seunghyun rushed over and pushed Jiyong against the closest wall.

The force made Jiyong gasp, his lips parting as Seunghyun claimed them in a passionate kiss. His hands gripped Jiyong’s waist as he leaned in, pressing their hips together. He rejoiced in his head as he felt Jiyong’s growing hardness against his own, he knew now that he wasn’t the only one who eager.

His tongue slid past Jiyong’s lips and he heard the smaller man moan as he sucked on the intruding muscle. Parting for a second, Seunghyun’s hand slithered up under the younger mans shirt and lifted it over his head, leaving it to fall on the floor beside them.

Looking at Jiyong he saw the desire in his eyes and the heat on his cheeks.

“You have no idea how hard it was to keep a straight face on the way up here,” the younger man huffed as Seunghyun attached himself to his neck. He felt him smile at the comment. “Y-you’re supposed to be an actor…. yet you kept looking at me… with sex eyes… and wearing your emotions all over your face… hmmm,” he hummed as Seunghyun nibbled on his neck.

“I thought you were ignoring me…”

“I was t-trying too… but-“

“Just shut up already,” Seunghyun demanded as he grinded their hips together once again and moved his hands down to undo Jiyong’s belt. He didn’t want to stall any longer. He needed him.

Jiyong pushed Seunghyun away from him as soon as the older man had finished undoing his belt and unzipping his pants. He shoved them down, stepping out of the fabric, and pushed Seunghyun again, trying to get him closer to the edge of the bed.

He saw Seunghyun look at him with lustful curiosity as he moved forward. He shoved him down, making him sit as he took off the older man’s shirt.

“Pants.” He vaguely ordered and Seunghyun quickly ridded himself of his jeans. It was a huge turn on to hear Jiyong’s demanding voice. “Now lay down on your stomach.”

Following instructions, Seunghyun scooted to the center of the bed, laying face down and then felt Jiyong climb on top of him, straddling his waist. Jiyong’s hands slid from the base of his spine and all the way to the nape of his neck, the pressure causing some of his joints to pop.

Jiyong kneaded Seunghyun’s tight shoulder muscles with his capable hands as the older man release a small groan of pleasure. He worked his way across his collarbone, down his shoulder blades and then back up to his neck, and then repeated the same movements.

“Mmmm… god this feels good,” he mumbled into the pillow.

Jiyong continued to massage Seunghyun, allowing his hands to roam over every inch possible, while the older man’s pleasure was heard throughout the room. Moaning and sighing every time Jiyong’s fingers and knuckles dug deep into his aching muscles.

“If you keep making those sounds, this massage is going to end sooner than you think…” Jiyong whispered into his ear, as he leaned forward and kneaded Seunghyun’s neck for the thousandth time.

“Hnn… I wouldn’t have any complaints.”

Hearing his words, Jiyong started kissing and nipping his way along Seunghyun’s neck and collarbone. Seunghyun slowly turned over to lay on his back, pulling Jiyong up to kiss him and feeling the younger man’s growing hardness rub against his own, humming at the friction.

“What did I just say?”

Seunghyun ignored him as he flipped them over and pressed Jiyong into the mattress, making sure Jiyong heard all the sounds he made at feeling his heated skin against his own. Jiyong giggled, knowing his boyfriend was being extra verbal, but it was too much of a turn on to stop him.

Seunghyun brushed his lips down Jiyong's chest, stopping to take his nipple into his mouth. Jiyong whimpered at feeling Seunghyun’s slick tongue slide over his skin and ran his fingers through the older man’s hair.

Moving his head lower, Seunghyun brought his hands up and started toying with the band of Jiyong’s boxers, making sure to brush his knuckles against his very apparent erection.

“I-I take it the massage is over t-then,” Jiyong asked. His breath catching as Seunghyun slightly tugged the band of his boxers down.

Seunghyun only had to look up at him to give his answer as a mischievous smile spread across his lips.

 

Their second tumble in the sheets was nothing like their first time. For this time, they had a hunger for each other which made every touch or kiss that much more harder and rougher. They were insatiable, needing to taste every part of one another. Their passion and lust over taking their minds.

Jiyong let himself be taken again, and if he was honest with himself, he would never say no to the man who was currently thrusting into him with all his strength. He let Seunghyun hear every moan and sigh of pleasure as the older man’s teeth grazed his skin. Biting and leaving small reminders for the morning.

After what seemed like seconds and hours all mixed into one, they found their release. Panting and shaking as they came down from their high.

Seunghyun laid on top of Jiyong, his head resting on the younger man’s slick chest. “Just push me off whenever I start to get too heavy,” he mumbled, knowing that his muscles wouldn’t be able to work even if he wanted them too.

Jiyong huffed out a laugh as he brought his hand up to start playing with his boyfriends damp hair.

“I had a lot of fun today…” Seunghyun said.

“I bet you did,” Jiyong joked. “You’ve been wanting to do this all day.”

Seunghyun rolled his eyes even though Jiyong couldn’t see them. “That’s not what I meant.” He lifted his head up to rest his chin on Jiyong’s sternum as he continued, “Today we felt normal. I felt like this was just another day for us. Spending every waking moment together, constantly by each others sides…” He kissed Jiyong’s chest. “I never want this feeling to go away.”

Jiyong brushed his thumb across Seunghyun’s cheek, seeing the heat from their lovemaking still present. “I’m not going anywhere,” he whispered.

 

 

The rest of the weekend consisted of more sightseeing of various places around the island balanced with time spent locked away in their room. Seunghyun wanted to completely devote his attention to Jiyong and their time together, so he decided to turn his phone off just so they wouldn’t have any interruptions in the last couple days.

They found it surprisingly easier to keep their distance from one another out in public, unlike the first day. The words Jiyong had spoken that morning kept replaying in Seunghyun’s head, ‘ _Just always remember that no matter how far apart we’ll seem outside, by the end of the day we will always come back to each other’_. It was that phrase that kept him sane the entire weekend.

He did have a couple fans recognize him over the course of the weekend and he found that they never questioned who Jiyong was or looked at him with judging eyes. They just asked for pictures and autographs and moved on.

 

 

On their last night, they found themselves on the small private beach where Jiyong had done the photo shoot, knowing that they would have it all to themselves especially at 11 o’clock at night. Seunghyun brought down a sheet and spreading it out to cover the sand as he set up a makeshift picnic comprised of food he bought at the local market earlier that day.

They ate and drank a bottle of wine while they listened to the rhythm of the waves crashing onto the shore. Once most of the food was gone, Seunghyun pulled Jiyong close and had him lean his back against his chest as he sat in between his legs. They sat in a comfortable silence, Jiyong drawing circles on Seunghyun’s thighs as they stared up into the stars.

“Thank you,” Jiyong said softly to the darkness. Seunghyun hugged him tightly at the comment. “This weekend has been amazing… I wish we could stay here forever.” His heart started beating as soon as the word left his mouth. _Forever._ What would that feel like, to spend forever with Seunghyun. Having his beautiful face be the first thing he sees in the morning and the last at night. To have that constant presence by his side and knowing that someone loves him no matter what. Forever with Seunghyun…

“I had a great time too,” the older man said as he kissed the back of Jiyong’s neck. “Which reminds me…” He trailed off as he leaned over and rummaged through the bag that they brought everything down in. “Ahh! There it is,” he said as he started pulling something out, but it was too dark to see what was in his hands until he brought it in front of the younger man’s face. “Here.”

“What is it?” Jiyong asked as he took the box from Seunghyun’s hand.

“You could try opening it,” he replied with a sarcastic tone as he moved his hand up to ruffle Jiyong’s hair.

Jiyong pushed himself up into more of a sitting position while Seunghyun leaned his head on the younger man’s shoulder to watch him open his gift. Carefully he cracked the leather box open and his breath caught in his throat. It was a stunning new watch, black on black, with silver accents around the face and silver hands.

“It’s beautiful Seunghyun.” He pulled it out and went to go put in on his wrist when his boyfriends hand stopped him for a second.

“Look on the back.”

Jiyong carefully flipped it over and brought it close to his face to see what he was talking about.

_To J,_

_A reminder that for every second,_

_I think of you._

 

His lips pulled back as he read the inscription and gave a small chuckle. It still amazed him how cheesy the older man could be sometimes, but it was one of the reasons he loved him so much.

“What?” Seunghyun asked, a little worried.

Jiyong turned around to face him. “Nothing.” He leaned in to kiss him. “I love it, thank you.”

Seunghyun pulled him closer as their lips found each other again. After a few minutes of tongue teeth and kisses, Jiyong suggested they start packing up to go back to their room saying that they had an early flight to catch in the morning.

Seunghyun nodded but said, “We’re picking up where we left off when we go back to the room.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

 

Even though they were taking the same flight back, they decided to take separate taxies to the airport just in case. And it was a good plan too because as soon as Seunghyun walked in, there were a couple people who saw him and started taking pictures.

Once he had checked his bag, he made his way to the gate and waited to see Jiyong again. He pulled out his phone and turned it on for the first time in two days and saw that he had dozens of missed calls and texts from Daesung, probably yelling at him for not contacting him. He ignored them, wanting to escape reality for the couple hours he still had before he landed back in Korea.

He saw Jiyong walking towards him and resisted the urge to take him into his arms as he came to sit next to him. He noticed that Jiyong was wearing the watch he had given him, and he heart swelled.

They were both in first class seating, same row, but separated by the isle. They didn’t mind, it gave them a little game to play as they would sneak peeks at one another while trying not to be caught.

When they landed, they walked as close to each other as possible off the plane, still taking glances and giving small smiles. But when they stepped out and into the airport Seunghyun’s smile faded.

Daesung was right there in front of them, pacing back and forth until he looked up and saw the two men. He rushed over and pulled them to the side as he quickly said, “Why the hell haven’t you been answering your phone?”

“I-“

“Never mind. At least I got here in time.”

“Daesung what the hell is going on?”

“I’ll explain more on the way home but long story short…” He paused and looked up to his friend with sorrow in his eyes. “Seunghyun, someone found out about you… and Jiyong.” He looked over to the smaller man for the first time. “A reporter…”

The ground seemed to fall out from beneath him. He paled and his vision was becoming fuzzy as panic started to set in.

“Seunghyun look at me,” Daesung said. “We need to get you out of here as quickly as possible.”

Seunghyun was in a daze and vaguely heard what his manager was saying. All he could see were the possible headlines on the news flashing in his head.

Daesung turned. “Jiyong, I’m sorry… but we have to go.”

Jiyong gave a small nod as he looked to Seunghyun. His heart shattered as he saw the amount of distress that was all over his boyfriends face. All he wanted to do was take him into his arms and tell him everything would be alright. But who was he kidding, this was not going to be alright. If anything it was going to be the most painful thing to happen to him. And he could do nothing about it except be there for when Seunghyun needed him most.

“Jiyong I need you to stay silent about this for now. Don’t talk to anyone. And don’t try to contact him, at least for a while. We have to sort this out on our side first.”

“But he needs-“

“Jiyong no.” Daesung said sternly. “Now, come on. Let’s go.” He pulled Seunghyun forward to start leaving but Jiyong stopped him. The younger man wrapped his arms around Seunghyun and quickly said, “I love you…”

Still in shock, Seunghyun was left speechless as he heard Jiyong’s words. He wanted to say them back, needed to. But his voice was lost. When he thought he had found it, Daesung pleaded that they leave and pulled him away from Jiyong.

“Seungri is waiting outside for you.” The manager said as he walked away, leaving Jiyong frozen in his spot.

 

That was the last thing he heard before Seunghyun disappeared.


	28. Chapter 28

Every news station and gossip magazine for the next couple weeks were covered in nothing but Seunghyun’s scandal. Jiyong watched day after day as people ripped the man he loved apart and it made his stomach churn, knowing that he could do nothing about it.

For some reason, when the news first hit, the reporter decided to hide who “Vick” was actually dating. The article only mentioned that Vick was in a secret relationship with man “J” and was accompanied with pictures of Seunghyun and himself, except all the pictures that were released had his image blurred out.

Apparently this reporter had been keeping track of them for months and knew that they had been together for just as long. There were images of them getting into taxies, going into Seunghyun’s apartment building, them at dinner, and even some from the Jeju trip.

But Jiyong knew that it was only a matter of time before people who had seen them together put two and two together. All it took was one little slip up from someone he worked with and his name would be plastered right up there with Seunghyun’s.

Through the first week Jiyong tried to busy himself with work, editing the pictures that were taken for the pictorial on Jeju. But his mind would wander and he would find himself thinking about the special moments him and Seunghyun had shared on the island.

By the middle of the second week Seungri was trying to get Jiyong more jobs to distract his boss and friend, but he could tell that his heart wasn’t in it any more. All his pictures weren’t coming out right and he was starting to snap more at people on sets, something that he has never done before.

After one particular fit of outrage by the photographer, Seungri walked up to him and got right in his face.

“If you don’t snap out of this right now, you might as well throw your whole career out the window. Your pictures look like shit and you’re acting like the biggest asshole on the planet. This isn’t you. And once you realize this, you’ll thank me. I know you’re going through a lot right now but think of what Seunghyun would say if he saw you acting like this?”

Although he risked getting fired, he knew it was worth it if he could save his friend. And apparently the words were just what Jiyong needed to hear. The older man looked to his assistant with watery eyes as he whispered for only him to hear, “Seungri… I just need to know he’s okay.”

He brought his hand up and wiped away the tears from Jiyong’s eyes. “I know and even though you can’t see him right now, you should try and be strong for him.”

Jiyong nodded.

“Now lets finish up and I’ll drive you back home, okay?”

He took a deep breath and composed himself as he apologized to everyone and finished the shoot without any more outbursts.

 

However at the beginning of the third week, his named had finally made it into the news and it was like reopening a fresh wound. Everyone seemed to be talking about it more and more, now that they finally knew who Vick's secret lover was. But by the end of that week he still hadn’t heard a single word from Seunghyun. It was like he dropped off the face of the earth and Jiyong wanted to drop off too. He told Seungri to cancel his appointments for the rest of the week, claiming he was sick but really he couldn’t concentrate on anything and everything he saw on a daily basis reminded him of his absent boyfriend.

He just wanted to be shut off from the rest of the world and their slander about Seunghyun and him that still plagued headlines. So he decided to drown himself in alcohol one night, trying to numb the pain away because nothing else seemed to be working

He wanted to feel the warmth of Seunghyun’s body against his and taste the sweetness of his kiss but all he could feel now was the burn of liquor down his throat and the sting on his lips. And he knew that that was all he was going to be feeling for a long time to come.

 

Later that night, Jiyong felt his phone vibrate beside him on the bed. He didn’t want to even know what time it was, let alone know who was calling so he just ignored it and fell back asleep. But the vibrations continued and after what seemed like 5 missed calls, Jiyong decided to answer the 6th.

“Hello…” he groaned into the device, still halfway asleep but very much drunk.

“Jiyong?”

Hearing the voice on the other end made him to sit upright very fast, the movement causing the alcohol induced headache to intensify.

“S-Seunghyun?” he hissed through the pain.

“Yeah… It’s me…”

There was an awkward silence. Jiyong’s mind was spinning, but he knew that it wasn’t all the alcohols fault. This was the first time in three weeks that he had heard Seunghyun’s voice and god it sound so good to hear it. His heart clenched and his eyes started to water at hearing the deep scruff of a voice that had been absent from his life.

“Jiyong… you still there?” He could hear an uneasiness in the older man’s voice.

“Yes,” he choked out. “Yes Seunghyun, I’m here.” He felt a tear roll down his cheek. His emotions were all over the place. He was thrilled to hear his boyfriends voice after so long, but it just reminded him of how long he hasn’t been able to see him, to touch him, to be there during all of this. He felt like the worst human possible for not being able to comfort Seunghyun in his most desperate time of need.

“I just needed to call you,” Seunghyun started. “To see how you’re doing…”

“See how _I’m_ doing?” Jiyong’s voiced reached another octave due to the emotions running through him. “Who cares about me! How are _you_ doing?” You’re the one going through all of this.”

He heard a shaky breath on the other end. He could see Seunghyun probably sitting on the couch, with feet on the edge as he rested his head on his knees. What he would do to be there right now.

“Seunghyun talk to me.” Jiyong heard what sounded like a sniffle. “Please… talk to me.”

After a few moments Seunghyun spoke in a broken voice, “I just… it’s… it’s all so hard…”

His voice cracked and Jiyong knew that he was crying, just like he was. He wiped some of the tears from his own eyes wishing he could do the same for Seunghyun right now.

“Shh… I know it is.” It took all his willpower to not drop the phone and go to him, even if it was 3 o’clock in the morning. Hearing how broken his boyfriend was had shattered every fiber of his being.

“I’m just mad at myself for letting this happen. I should have been more careful, _we_ should have been more careful. I don’t want to feel this way anymore. I’m tired and worn out. All I want to do is stay locked up.”

“It’s okay… everything is going to be fine…”

“Don’t tell me everything is going to be fine,” Seunghyun shot back. “This will never be fine… at least not like this.”

“Just come over. Come over to my place.”

“I can’t… I can’t see you right now.”

“Why is it because of Daesung? Does he not want you to leave your house?”

“No… I-I can’t face _you_.”

“What are you talking about?”

“How am I supposed to face the world if I can’t even face you. I can’t bear to see you look at me with sympathy and sorrow. You of all people…”

“Seunghyun I wouldn’t-“

“You say that now, but I know you would. You probably do every time you see my picture on TV. I just can’t handle it right now.”

“Seunghyun-“

“See right there, I can even hear it in your voice. I feel like I’m a disappointment to everyone around me. I can’t go out of the house anymore because people keep looking at me and saying things under their breath and its driving me insane. They all have disgust in their eyes and it makes me feel like I _am_ disgusting. I feel like shit. And I just want this all to end…”

“Seunghyun, please don’t shut me out.”

“I just… need some time away… to sort through things.” He released a deep breath. “I need to take a break.”

“You’ve been gone for weeks, isn’t that enough of a break? Or are you saying that you want a break from us…” Jiyong paused. “Are you ending our relationship? Just because people finally know about us?” Anger started to creep up into Jiyong’s voice.

“No that’s not-“

“So you were fine doing everything we did as long as no one knew about it. I was just a secret that you wanted to hide?”

“You know that’s not how it is and plus Daesung and Seungri both knew.”

“They had already known for years what our sexual preference was and they’ve been by our side all along.”

“But I’m not like you, I just need time!”

“Time for what? To go back to hiding me? Our relationship and who you really are?”

“No that’s not it-“

“Are you ashamed of me?”

“Jiyong! I’ve nev-”

“Seunghyun if this is who you really are… a coward… then I don’t think we should continue this…”

“Jiyong please no, that not what I meant-“

“I have to go.” He choked out as he hung up the phone.

He collapsed back onto his bed with tears streaming down his face. He knew what he was saying and he knew that it would hurt both him and Seunghyun, but for some reason he couldn’t stop saying it. He wanted to say that the liquor was twisting his words, but really, it was making all his hidden insecurities come out. He never told Seunghyun how much he actually wanted their relationship to be public.

No matter how much he wanted believe that fate had brought them together, he didn’t want it to be fate that pulled them apart. They were finally out to everyone, but Jiyong never wanted it to happen like this. Anything but this…

He rolled onto side and wrapped his arms around himself, trying to hold himself together, but it wasn’t working. Screaming into the darkness he cursed the world and himself for making Seunghyun go through so much pain.

The alcohol churned in his stomach and he tried to fight the nausea, but with all these emotions running through him, they were starting to physically affect him, and the liquor decided to make itself known once again.

He quickly got up and ran to the bathroom to empty his stomach, wanting some sort of release form this agony. Once he finished throwing up, he crumpled onto the cool tile with nothing left inside of him except for an emptiness in his heart.

 

It was the first time in years that Jiyong had cried himself to sleep. And when he woke up the next morning his head was pounding, his throat sore and he found that he was still sprawled out on the bathroom floor. When he stood, last night’s events came rushing back to him.

How he drank every possible alcoholic substance in his house.

How Seunghyun had called him.

What he had said to him…

And he regretted every damn syllable.


	29. Chapter 29

_3 months later_

 

“Ok great. Now lift your chin… a little to the left… stop.” _Click_ “Good. Bring your hand down.” _Click Click_ “Great… and…” _Click_ “We’re… done.”

Jiyong brought his camera down and turned to face the rest of the staff on set. “Thanks everyone, that’s a wrap.”

The room was soon filled with people moving things and breaking down equipment while Jiyong turned to the model. “Allison you were wonderful, as always.”

The tall redhead smiled and walked toward him in her yellow summer dress. “It’s always a joy to have you take me photo’s Jiyong, but I had no idea you were even in town. How long have you been back in L.A.?”

“Umm 3 months…”

“Really! That long! And you didn’t text me…” She playfully frowned.

Jiyong chuckled. “Sorry. When I originally came back I wasn’t planning on staying this long.”

“Do you know how much longer you’re going to be here?”

Jiyong shrugged his shoulders, “Not really, time will only tell.”

“Allison! Come on we have to go to your fitting across town.” Her manager yelled.

“Shit I forgot.” She muttered. “Well if you have some free time we should meet up, get the old gang back together and have a couple drinks…”

“Sounds fun.”

She flashed him her brilliant smile that he had just been taking photos of. “Sweet. I’ll try and give you a call soon. See ya!”

As soon as Allison was gone from his side, Seungri came up and quickly replaced her with his iPad in hand.

“Ok so this was the last shoot for this week. Tomorrow you’re scheduled for an editing session and then Friday you have some phone conferences with some magazines in Japan and Korea.”

They walked towards the back of the studio where his equipment was and started packing up while he listened to him. “Oh and your mother called to say that everything was fine this morning and they already left the hospital and are almost back to the house.”

“Did she say if she needed anything for him?”

Seungri shook his head. “No, just that they are still expecting us tonight for dinner.”

“Ok.” Jiyong finished putting the last lens away and stood up as he looked at his watch. “Well its only 3 now and we don’t have to be at their house till 8, so let’s head back the apartment and let me get a jump start on editing for tomorrow.”

“Sounds good. I’ll meet you outside,” Seungri said as he grabbed Jiyong’s hard case and wheeled it out to the car.

Jiyong went around saying goodbyes and thank you’s to the rest of the staff as he grabbed his laptop with all the photo’s from the day on it and then finally made it outside where Seungri had the car ready and waiting for him. He threw the rest of his belongings on the front seat and then opened the back door and crawled in, laying on his back.

“I’m just gonna take a quick nap on the ride over okay,” he yawned to Seungri as his eyes started closing.

“Still not sleeping well?” The younger man asked as he started driving.

“No… not really,” he said as he adjusted himself to get comfortable. He tried using his arm as a pillow but his watch kept digging into his wrist bone. Bringing it in front of his face, he slowly took off the black accessory, his fingers running over the smooth face that showed the silver detailing. His heart clenched and he could feel his throat tightening up as he looked at it in his hands, remembering the person who gave him the watch.

Letting out a long sigh, he turned onto his side trying to fall asleep. He knew _the dream_ would be coming any second, but no matter how much he wanted to avoid it, he thought it would be better to just get it out of the way and maybe he could find a peaceful sleep afterward.

_The dream was the same every single time. He always found himself walking down the street on a bright sunny day. He was always his 12 year old self. And he always had 12 year old Seunghyun by his side._

_They would be walking home from school together when they would stop at their favorite playground, not wanting to be separated just yet. Jiyong knew that this was his happiest time from childhood. When he actually had a friend. Seunghyun was there for him and helped him come out of his shell a little bit._

_They swung on the swing set, Seunghyun jumped off and landed gently on the ground as he asked Jiyong if he wanted to head home. Jiyong followed suit and jumped off as well to stand next to his best friend as he said that he didn’t want to leave just yet. Seunghyun smiled and said, “Great.” He then quickly reached out and tapped Jiyong on the shoulder as he yelled, “You’re it!” and ran away as fast as possible._

_“Ahh hyung, you know I can’t run that fast,” he whined, even though he had a smile on his face, as he started chasing after the boy, hearing laughter ahead of him._

_He saw Seunghyun round the corner of the jungle gym and as soon as he rounded the corner too, the older boy was nowhere in sight._

_He knew deep in his subconscious that this was when his dream turned into a nightmare, for the sky was slowly turning dark as the playground started to fade away._

_“Hyung…” He would always cry out, looking for the lost boy. “Seunghyun… where are you…” His voice would echo against invisible walls. “I thought we were playing tag… not hide and seek…” By now the playground had completely faded away and he was left in total darkness save for a light that came from somewhere above him. “Seunghyun… where are you…” He would always follow the same path, still trying to find the boy in the darkness, but every time he would trip and fall._

_“Jiyong…” Seunghyun’s voice would echo around him. He would turn around in circles trying to find the source of the voice. “Jiyong… Jiyong…”_

_“Seunghyun… please… come back…” Panic started overtaking him, his breath getting caught in his throat. “I’m scared…”_

_And as always, as soon as he uttered those words, the light would go out leaving him alone in total darkness._

 

He jerked awake, breathing heavily from the panic he felt in the dream, and found himself still in the backseat of the car. Sitting up he rubbed his eyes and stretched as he looked out the window to see where they were. He gave an internal sigh of relief as he saw that they were approaching their apartment complex. He was ready to be out of this car and away from the memory of the dream he just had.

Walking into the apartment Jiyong looked to Seungri and said, “Hey I’m gonna take a shower real fast, can you set up my laptop so I can start editing when I get done?”

Seungri nodded but could see that something was bothering the older man. Well, bothering him more than normal. He saw the look in Jiyong’s eyes, the distant, lifelessness look. It was almost like he was the shell of the man he once knew. There was no spark of life or happiness left in him, and no matter how carefree he presented himself out in the world to others, Seungri would see the broken man that he really was at the end of every day.

It was as if Jiyong had become a robot, like he would flip a switch and be the charismatic young photographer when he needed to, but the rest of the time he would shut down and confine himself to mindless work.

If Seungri was honest with himself he knew that at least “robot” Jiyong was better than the “other” Jiyong that he had walked in on 3 months ago, he knew it was better for the older man to drown himself in work rather than alcohol.

 

3 months ago, after the news broke out about Seunghyun to the world, Seungri tried his hardest to be there for his friend. He saw him go through so many different things since they’ve been friends, but this one was the worst. At first Jiyong was just using work as a distraction while he waited for Seunghyun to contact him. But after a couple weeks of nothing, Seungri started noticing that the older man was starting to lose weight and he had dark circles under his eyes, however the thing that changed the most was his attitude. In all their years of working together, Seungri had never seen Jiyong yell at a model or staff on set, but as the rule of the world says, there’s a first for everything.

Even though they still had photo shoots and appointments, the number of jobs was starting to dwindle, but then you throw in the attitude that Jiyong was taking to the few shoots they did have, and Seungri knew that if he didn’t do something soon, no one would want to hire Jiyong again. So with that in mind, Seungri stood up to his boss one day and tried to knock some sense into the older man. He thought that it had worked until the next week when Jiyong’s name was finally released to the media that he had been Seunghyun’s boyfriend.

When Seungri got the phone call from Jiyong, asking to cancel the rest of the appointments for the week, he completely understood why, even if Jiyong tried to play off that he was sick. However after a few days of not hearing from him, he decided to go over to Jiyong’s place to see how he was doing, but what he found had truly scared him.

Jiyong was never a heavy drinker, he was more of a social drink and sometimes he would like to get drunk with friends, but what Seungri walked into when he arrived at Jiyong’s apartment, was truly terrifying. He could smell stale beer mixed with other hard liquors that burned his nose and he could only imagine at how much it would burn going down his throat. When he couldn’t immediately locate Jiyong in the living room or kitchen, Seungri looked in his bedroom. But when he looked down the hall, he saw Jiyong passed out on the bathroom floor.

As soon as he had seen that, he knew that he had to get Jiyong out. Out of the situation, out of the country, and out of this dark pit that he had pulled himself down into. So after sobering him up and trying to get him back to being a functioning human being, which took several days, Seungri had come up with a plan.

He told Jiyong that they had a couple offers from magazines over in America and tried to explain to his boss that not only would it be a great opportunity to take these jobs, but it would be good for him to get away from the whole situation that was happening around him.

Surprisingly, Jiyong agreed without hesitation and before they knew it, they were back in America working nonstop. As soon as they arrived he knew they had made the right decision in coming back, if only for a short while. No one in America really knew about celebrity gossip in other countries, so it was almost as if nothing had happened… almost. Despite being away from all the hate and slander, Seungri could still see how the whole thing affected Jiyong. He did try and ask Jiyong if he had talked to Seunghyun, but he would always brush off the question and change the topic.

During the first month of being back in America, Seungri helped Jiyong to back into the swing of things. He saw him smile during photo shoots, but he could tell that it was just for show, it never reached his eyes. He was starting to think that he would never see Jiyong as happy as he had been with Seunghyun, and that scared him. Even though they had a boss/assistant relationship, underneath he knew that he was one of Jiyong’s closest friends, and of course as a friend you never want to see someone you care about go through heartache.

Just when Seungri thought they were starting to make more progress, helping Jiyong put his life back together, the world decided to throw something else at the already broken photographer.

Jiyong had gotten a call from his mother asking if him and Seungri would like to go out to dinner to catch up and of course Jiyong couldn’t pass up the opportunity to see his family after so long. They had agreed to meet at a nice restaurant and were in the middle of enjoying their meal when Jiyong’s father all of a sudden started having chest pains.

That night was a complete blur after that, with everyone going to the hospital and waiting to find out if he would be okay. Seungri saw the panic in Jiyong’s face, no matter how much he tried to hide it. Jiyong had already come a long way from where he was when they first came back, but now all he saw was the scared child who was frightened that he would lose his father on top of losing the person that he loved the most.

 

Fortunately his father had pulled through. It was a massive heart attack but the doctors said that with plenty of rest and stress free living he would make a full recovery.  

However after the whole scare with his father, Jiyong shut down even more than before. He wouldn’t talk unless it was about work and he would spend his days locked up in his room editing. The one time that Jiyong did talk to Seungri was to tell him that he wanted to stay in America until he knew his dad was better.

So here they were 1 month after his dad’s heart attack and they were stuck in the same routine for weeks. Go to photo shoot, watch Jiyong pretend that everything is okay, come home, and then watch Jiyong shut down and hide himself away.

But today when they walked in to their apartment that they had rented for the time being, Seungri saw the way Jiyong was carrying himself. Like all the weight he had been carrying for the past three months had finally taken its toll on him. He watched as the older man walked into the bathroom and just as he turned the corner, Seungri saw him wipe a tear from his eye.

When Jiyong got out of the shower, he told Seungri to call his parents and tell them that he wasn’t feeling well and that they should reschedule dinner for another time. Hearing this, the younger man knew that it was finally time to speak up, and before he let Jiyong disappear from sight he grabbed him and pulled him onto the couch.

“Jiyong, we need to talk.”

“Seungri, I don’t want to. I just want to be left alone.”

“Well I’ve done that for the past 3 months and I’m tired of seeing you like this.” He gestured to his face. “You’ve lost weight, you have dark circles under your eyes from lack of sleep, and all you do is work. You’ve been miserable for months and I think it about time to finally talk about what happened in Korea.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Jiyong tried to get up but Seungri just pushed him back down.

“Bullshit! If there wasn’t anything, then you wouldn’t be acting like this. You need to talk to Seunghyun.”

Jiyong flinched at the name. It had been so long since he heard it out loud that it was like a nail piercing his heart when Seungri had said it. He had tried so hard to push all thoughts of the man out of his head, but as soon as he heard his name, everything they had shared came rushing back to him.

Seungri watched as Jiyong’s face fell, pain written all over it. Trying to be as careful about this situation as possible, he softly asked, “Have you talked to him recently?”

Jiyong just shook his head.

Seungri sighed. “Well I talked to Daesung the other day, you know just to catch up.” Jiyong shot his head up. “We didn’t really talk about much… just that you and I have been in America for a while. He said that things over in Korea have died down about Seunghyun… it’ll still pop up every now and then, but you know how gossip fades when a new scandal breaks out. The new topic is that some singer is caught up in a drug scandal so that’s been the hot topic for a couple weeks. Daesung also said that he and Seunghyun have been in Japan for about a month. Even though a lot of his endorsements in Korea dropped him once the news hit, some of his overseas endorsements decided that they still wanted him, so he’s been working in Japan.”

Jiyong nodded and mumbled, “That’s good…”

“Look Jiyong, I know you hate me telling you to do something, but know that I only do it when its something that would be good for you, so why don’t you give him a call?”

“Did Daesung say that he wanted to talk to me?”

“No, but-“

“I won’t.”

“Just call him.”

“I can’t!” Jiyong yelled, clenching his eyes shut as he took in a deep breath.

“Why not? You two had so much together and then once the world found out, you guys just ended it. I thought you’d be stronger than this Jiyong, you’ve gone through this kind of thing. You should be there for him.”

“You think I don’t know that.” He shot back.

“Then why are you guys ignoring each other?”

“I don’t know! Trust me I’ve tried, but… I…” His voice cracked as his eyes started watering. “You want to know why I agreed to come back to America, because the one time he actually did call me after all this happened, I accused him of being ashamed of me. That he wanted to hide our relationship. I was drunk and I was taking my insecurities out on him. I never gave him the chance to explain. But when he said that he didn’t want to see me, I couldn’t handle it. After everything we’ve been through, I just broke down. I was scared and hurt and all I cared about was trying to drink the pain away. And then you found me passed out and suggested we leave, all I could think about was how if Seunghyun didn’t want to talk to me or see me, then I would make easier for him and go halfway across the world. But then as soon as we got here I realized how idiotic I was being. I was running away, but running away wouldn’t solve anything. It wouldn’t make me feel any better about myself and how I treated him when _he_ was the one who reached out to me. And I knew that I was just being a coward by not trying to call him, but every time I thought about calling him all I could hear was his voice in the back of my mind saying “I can’t face you” and I just can’t hear that again… I couldn't bare to hear that from the same voice that said 'I love you' to me so many times... I can’t handle this Seungri. With this and then the scare with my father… it’s all just too much. So I try and immerse myself in work just so I can pretend that I can still do something useful… because all I want to do is just give up! God…I’m such a coward.”

That was the breaking point. All the pent up emotions that he had bottled up inside him for the past three months came rushing out. He doubled over in on himself and let the tears fall.

Seungri scooted closer and pulled Jiyong into his arms. He didn’t care if his shirt would be stained with the older man’s tears and snot, all he cared about was being the shoulder his friend needed to cry on. He was glad that Jiyong had finally opened up but he understood that doing so would bring heartache.

He felt Jiyong’s body shaking as he cried, his breath catching in his throat as he tried to get more air into his lungs. Gently rubbing his hand on the older man’s back, he tried his best to let him know that he was and always would be there for him.

They sat there on the couch for who knows how long, with Jiyong eventually laying his head in Seungri’s lap and falling asleep, tear stains on his cheeks and eyes puffed red. The younger man stayed still, knowing that Jiyong needed some semblance of a peaceful sleep, and if he could be the one to keep him calm, then he would sit here for weeks hoping that he would one day return to the bright, cheerful man that he once knew.

 

The next day Jiyong went right back into his routine and immersed himself into work again, but this time Seungri saw a small change. He didn’t know what it was, maybe it was from just letting himself go the previous night, but whatever it was, it gave him hope that he was on his way to his old self.

That weekend they had a conference call with a Japanese magazine to go over the last minute details for the shoot next week, but the entire time Seungri could tell that Jiyong’s mind was somewhere else. Typically Jiyong would ask dozens of questions about the shoot, the clothing, the model, the story they wanted to tell, just so he could be ready for when they started. But all he did was just listen to the man over the phone and “hmmm” whenever was necessary.

When they hung up, Seungri asked him what he was thinking about and all Jiyong said was, “Seunghyun’s in Japan…”

“And…”

“What if we run into each other?”

“Well Japan is a pretty big place Jiyong… But what would you say to him if you did see him?”

“I-I don’t know…”

 

 

“Seungri can’t you drive faster?” Jiyong yelled at his assistant.

“Do you want me to drive through the cars in front of us? It’s not me, it’s the damn traffic?”

“Well we’re going to be late!”

“I know, I’m trying my best.”

They had been sitting in the traffic jam for the past 20 minutes in the middle of downtown Tokyo, trying to get to the photo shoot. They had already turned down 2 wrong streets and it was starting to frustrate Jiyong, he hated being late. Seungri on the other hand thought that it was good to hear some life in the older man’s voice, even if he was being yelled at. Ever since they had landed in Japan, Jiyong had been more vocal and talkative, again Seungri didn’t know what sparked the change in the photographer, but he was glad that listen to whatever Jiyong had to say.

After another hour they were finally pulling up to the studio. Jiyong jumped out of the car, grabbing his laptop bag and ran inside, they were 20 minutes late.

“Sorry everyone, we hit some traffic. Let my assistant and I set up really fast and then we can start.” Jiyong was so thankful that he and Seungri had come last night to set up all the staging with some of the staff from the magazine. It was almost like the gods knew that he was going to be late the next morning.

One of the staffers came up to Jiyong to tell him everything that was going on so far.

“Hello sir. Don’t be too worried about being late, all the lighting is set and the model is in hair and makeup.”

“Great.”

Seungri came in and started unpacking all of Jiyong’s camera equipment. He put a lens on the camera and handed it to Jiyong who had just finished setting up his laptop. The older man started to press buttons and change the settings.

“Ok, well I don’t like being behind schedule,” Jiyong said to the staff member who was still by his side. “So if everyone else is ready, let’s get this started.”

The staff member turned and said to the rest of the crew to get in their places while Jiyong looked around for the model.

“Is the model ready yet? Can I have the model on set?”

Seungri spoke up and said that he would go and get him, Jiyong nodded and turned to do some last minute adjustments to the lights and set. A few minutes later, Jiyong heard footsteps coming up behind and before he could turn around, someone called out his name.

“Jiyong.”

His blood froze in his veins and his breath had left his lungs. He could feel his hands starting to shake and was starting to see black spot in the corner of his eyes. However he somehow found a way to turn around to face the man who had spoke.

“Hello Jiyong… It’s good to see you.” The man said quietly.

His throat closed up on him but his mind was racing.

_Seunghyun. Seunghyun is standing right in front of me._


	30. Chapter 30

_Jiyong heard footsteps coming up behind and before he could turn around, someone called out his name._

_“Jiyong.”_

_His blood froze in his veins and his breath had left his lungs. He could feel his hands starting to shake and was starting to see black spot in the corner of his eyes. However he somehow found a way to turn around to face the man who had spoke._

_“Hello Jiyong… It’s good to see you.” The man said quietly._

_His throat closed up on him but his mind was racing._

_Seunghyun. Seunghyun is standing right in front of me._

 

It was like the he was back in his nightmare. The world disappeared around him and he was standing under a spotlight, except that in this nightmare Seunghyun didn't disappear, he was standing right in front of him waiting for him to say something.

All Jiyong was capable of, was staring at the man before him. He hadn’t seen Seunghyun in over three months and now they were face to face. He wasn't prepared for this. Mentally or physically. He started to feel light headed and could feel his heart beating out of his chest.

 _This is not happening. This is not happening._ Was his mantra in his head and it was the only thought that he could come up with. He blinked his eyes a couple times hoping that he would wake up from this living nightmare any second.

“Jiyong?” Seunghyun repeated as he reached out to touch the younger man on the shoulder to get his attention.

“Don’t touch me.” Jiyong snapped, recoiling from the older man’s extended arm.

Seunghyun flinched back like he had just been physically slapped. If he was honest, it basically was a slap to the face, having someone who used to buckle at your slightest touch, suddenly treat you like you were diseased.

Seungri stood off to the side and watched as Jiyong paled, his breathing became erratic. Thinking that his boss was going to pass out, he quickly walked up and pulled him outside, away from Seunghyun and the rest of the crew.

Jiyong didn’t resist being pulled away. He felt the hot summer air hit his skin and it was too much of a contrast from the chilled studio, so all he could was crouch down and close his eyes while he held his stomach.

“Whoa Jiyong! Are you alright?” the assistant asked.

“I-I think I’m g-gonna be sick.”

Seungri crouched down beside him and rubbed his back. “Look I know I should have told you-“

“You’re fucking right you should have told me.” Jiyong hissed at him through clenched teeth, wishing for the nausea to go away.

“Daesung called me the other week and explained some things to me about Seunghyun and what was going on in his life.”

Jiyong ran his hands through his hair and scrunched his eyes tight before opening them. “Yeah you told me.” He slowly stood back up as the initial shock of the whole situation was dissipating.

“Yes, but I didn’t tell you everything,” Seungri continued.

Jiyong put his hand up to his heart to try and stop it from beating out of his chest. His hands were shaking and sweaty. “Obviously…” he said to Seungri but his eyes were pointed up to the clouds. Finally he brought his gaze down to his assistant and looked him straight in the eyes and spoke once he knew he had gained his voice back.

“What the fuck did you think you were doing by not telling me about this?”

“I uh… I umm…” Seungri stuttered at Jiyong’s outburst.

Jiyong ran his hands through hair again as he fought back tears that threatened to escape his eyes. He was frustrated and freaking out.

“I haven’t seen him in three months Seungri! There’s a reason why!” He turned his back to the younger man, not wanting him to see him break down even more. “And now, all of sudden you shove him in my face without any warning-“ His voice cracked as he said the last word. Running his hand over his face to calm himself down, he took a deep breath and then confessed, “I can’t go back in there…”

Seungri stepped closer to Jiyong and grabbed his shoulder to turn him around. He reached up and took hold of his friends face, just so he would get the message he was about to say across to him.

“I know this is a huge shock right now, but I will not sit back and watch you walk out on your career. We are here to do a photo shoot for a paying client. I will drag you into that studio if I have to. I will explain everything at a later time but right now you need to be Kwon Jiyong. The best fucking photographer in the business.”

Jiyong took in a sharp breath at the forwardness of his assistant. His mind was on overdrive, trying to think of what to do. “But… how can I take his picture if I can’t even look at him?” Jiyong asked in a barely there whisper.

Seungri lowered his hands to Jiyong’s shoulders as he saw the pain in his eyes and heard the heartache in his voice. “Can I ask something personal?”

Jiyong knitted his eyebrows together at the random question. “Y-yeah.”

“Do you love Seunghyun?”

Jiyong’s eyes widened in shock for the second time that day. “Seungri!”

The young man put up his hand to silence him. “Do. You. Still. Love. Him?”

Jiyong opened and closed his mouth several times trying to say something. Eventually he closed his eyes and took a deep breath and confessed, “Yes. Yes I do still love him.”

“Ok so go back in there, knowing that. Even if you might not have forgiven him for whatever reason. Know that you _do_ still love him.” Jiyong looked up to Seungri. “I’m not saying that you have to get back together right here and now, but use this opportunity to break the ice and start talking again.”

“But I don’t even know if he still feels the same way. It’s been so long, and the way he ignored me back then-”

“Jiyong…” Seungri shook his shoulders trying to get him to focus again to what he was saying. “I wouldn’t have done all of this if I knew that his feelings have changed. I knew you would never have gotten the courage yourself to call him, so I just took matters into my own hands. Because I’m tired of seeing you being miserable. You need him. And he needs you. So… take a deep breath, collect your thoughts, and let’s go on back inside. There are people other than Seunghyun waiting for you in there.”

Jiyong took in everything that Seungri just told him. It was all true. Every single word. He was still in love with Seunghyun. He knew that he had never stopped loving him. Even though his head was still spinning from shock and the realization, he also knew that he had to pull himself together, not just for his sanity, but for Seungri’s as well.

He would go in there as a photographer. Only after the shoot was done would he let his mind start to think about anything else.

“Ok… lets go.”

 

 

The doors to the studio opened again and everyone stopped to look over at Jiyong and Seungri as they entered.

“Sorry everyone, let’s just get on with the shoot.” Jiyong said as he looked around the room. “Can I get the Model on set and in position?” he continued as he walked over to his equipment and started pulled out his camera and lens.

Seunghyun, who had watched Jiyong’s every move since the door opened, saw that the man did not once look his way. He knew coming here and doing this photo shoot was going to be hard… for both of them, but all he wanted to do was hold Jiyong in his arms and never let him out of his sight again. And his heart felt like it would break into a thousand pieces every time Jiyong avoided his eyes as they both walked onto the main part of the set. He could tell there was something different about the younger man, it was like he had switched off the Jiyong he knew and the man that walked on set was someone he had never seen before.

Jiyong stopped and looked to Seungri to see that he was in position. “Makeup on standby?” He saw an older woman raise her hand with a small makeup kit in it, Jiyong nodded at her. “Hair?” A man in his early 30’s raised a comb in the air, again Jiyong nodded.

Seunghyun had been standing in position waiting for instructions when finally Jiyong looked at him and walked over.

“Sorry about earlier,” he started in a hushed voice so only they could hear. “I didn’t know you were my model today and well…it was a huge shock. But, we are here to work, understand? I don’t want to talk-“ Seunghyun saw then, as soon as they locked eyes that the “new” man that he had just seen was only a mask. Even though it was distant, he saw a glimmer of the Jiyong he loved buried deep in the younger man’s eyes.

“Jiyong-” Seunghyun interjected, but Jiyong spoke over him.

“I don’t want to talk _here._ ” He emphasized. “But just know that I…” He took a deep breath. “I _do_ want to talk.”

Seunghyun gave a small smile to show his gratitude and understanding and eagerly asked, “Tonight?”

Jiyong shook his head slightly. “Let’s worry about the when and where after this. For now, we need to get started.”

It was then that Seunghyun finally placed the “new” Jiyong persona. He had never really experienced it first hand, only watched from afar a couple times he visited Jiyong while he was doing other shoots, but he knew that Jiyong was in full photographer mode. So without delaying things any further he asked, “Where shall I stand?”

 

 

If Jiyong had said that the photo shoot was going great, everything was perfect, things weren’t awkward at all and so on… well then he would be a huge fucking liar. Nothing was working, the photos weren’t coming out right and the more frustrated he got with himself, he could tell Seunghyun was equally getting frustrated.

The entire set was on edge as Jiyong huffed and puffed while he gave directions to Seunghyun. The staff could tell that something was off even before the shooting, and as an hour progressed they could all seeing that it was going nowhere fast.

Jiyong clicked away as he moved around Seunghyun, who changed his position every couple seconds but nothing was working. People were becoming restless, whispering under their breath to one another, and as much as Jiyong tried to ignore it all… he couldn’t. Without warning he let the arm that held his camera fall to his side as he turned and yelled, “Everyone out. The set is officially closed.” He looked to Seungri who asked, “Are you sure?”

“Yes. Now get everyone out so I can concentrate.”

Everyone looked around at each other not understanding what was happening when all of a sudden a deep voice spoke up behind Jiyong.

“He said everyone out! MOVE!”

Jiyong turned to see that it was Seunghyun who had spoken. The older man looked down and tried to tell Jiyong he knew what was going on without him having to say it.

“Thanks…”

“No problem.”

They waited for as the last person to leave and as Jiyong heard the door shut he suddenly realized that in kicking everyone out, him and Seunghyun would be alone. Panic started to swell up inside him because he knew that couldn’t do photo shoots with things distracting him or the model, so that’s why he did a one session every now and then, but how was he going to finish when the biggest distraction was standing right next to him, waiting for him to say something.

After a few awkward seconds of silence Seunghyun decided to speak up. “So… isn’t this the part where you sit me down and ask questions?”

“What?” Jiyong was startled by the sudden break in silence that he spoke without thinking.

“This is one of your one sessions right?” Jiyong slowly nodded. “We did this when we first met, remember?” He said as he took a step closer to Jiyong.

Seunghyun’s words were like a punch to the gut. That nauseous feeling came back tenfold as all the memories of their first meeting came rushing back to him. How he thought Seunghyun was an asshole, but discovered that he was a very hurt and lonely man. It was the meeting that had changed their lives forever.

Jiyong quickly stepped back and brought his camera up to distract him from the images that replayed in his head of everything they had been through together. “Yeah I remember… but let’s just get on with _this_ shoot.”

Seunghyun felt a piece of his heart chip away at the coldness of the statement. As soon as he heard Jiyong tell everyone to get out, he knew what was happening, and he had hoped it would be a good time to talk to Jiyong finally, without anyone listening to them. But the way the younger man was acting, it seemed like this was strictly business. Dejected, Seunghyun just stood and waited for the photographer to tell him what to do.

 

 

Even though there was still awkwardness between them, the shoot seemed to be going better… at least from Seunghyun’s perspective. Jiyong was sighing less and his body was less tense than before. But every time Seunghyun tried to start a conversation, Jiyong would just give one word answers. After another 15 minutes of one sided conversations, Seunghyun dropped his arms from the pose he was supposed to be in and asked, “Why aren’t you talking to me?”

Jiyong fiddled with his camera. “I am talking to you.”

“You’re talking _at_ me not _with_ me.”

“Seunghyun please not now…”

“No Jiyong I can’t take it anymore. Just tell me something about your life. What’ve you been doing? Where have you been?”

“Seunghyun I don’t want to talk about this now. I just want to do this photo shoot and be done with it.”

“And then what? Are we going to talk _then_? Or are you going to disappear again?” Anger filled him up.

Jiyong’s head shot up and he glared at him. “ _Are you sure you really want to do this_?” he asked with venom in his voice.

Seunghyun gulped and the sudden change in temper of the younger man. He knew that this would be a very touchy subject for both of them but it almost sounded like Jiyong had spent his time coming to hate him, and all of a sudden he didn’t know if he was ready to hear it or not.

When Seunghyun didn’t say anything, Jiyong continued. “You were the one who said that you didn’t want to see me again. So I made it easier for both of us. I went to America to get away from everything.”

“Jiyong. I never said that I didn’t want to see you again.”

“Yes you did! And it felt like my heart was being torn or of my body!” He yelled at Seunghyun as he set his camera down on a nearby table. “After all that we went through how could say that to me? Especially with everything that was going on?”

“Jiyong, you never gave me a chance to explain.”

“Explain what? How I was just a dirty little secret to you?”

“YOU WERE NEVER MY DIRTY SECRET!” Seunghyun shouted at the top of his lungs. “It was me. I was the one who was dirty. I was dirty because I kept my real self hidden. I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror! So how was I supposed to face you?”

A tear escaped the corner of Seunghyun’s eye and he turned away from Jiyong. He wasn’t going to let his emotions get the best of him. Not after he worked so hard and had come so far in the last three months.

“What are you saying?” Jiyong now gave Seunghyun his undivided attention after hearing the older man scream out. His heart was racing and he now wanted to know what was on the other man’s mind.

Seunghyun sat down on the chair that was part of the set as he started his explanation.

“I… I needed time to become… not someone who _I_ was proud of, but to become someone _you_ were proud of.” He paused knowing that he needed to choose his words carefully.

“When we were together, you gave me confidence. And for all that time, I felt horrible that I couldn’t show you off to the world. I felt like a hypocrite… and when you asked if I was ashamed of you, I was so taken aback because I’ve always had this fear that you’ve been ashamed of me. Because I wasn’t out yet.”

Jiyong walked over to the older man. “Seunghyun, I’d never be asha-“

“I was scared.” Seunghyun cut him off, but kept his head down as he spoke, playing with the fabric of the chair. He just wanted to get everything that he’s kept inside over the last couple months, out.

“When everything happened… I quickly found out how much of a sad, scared little boy I was. My entire world got ripped open for the whole world to see and I couldn’t handle it. You know I’ve always been a private person but when your biggest secret is said for everyone to hear it, _without your consent_ …it was like my world was ending… and I didn’t want you to have to go through that darkness with me.”

Jiyong kneeled down beside Seunghyun and saw that there were tear drops on the back of his hand. He brought his own up and took the older man’s hand in his, wiping away the droplets. Seunghyun smiled at the gestures and brought his face up to look at Jiyong.

“During these months I’ve spent so much time thinking about you… and us…but most of all I spent time thinking about how I needed to change. When we were together, you were confident in who you are… but I wasn’t. I’ve been hiding behind the persona of Vick all these years, but then when I was with you, I rediscovered who I was deep down.

I’m the person I am today because of you. You helped me discover who I am. You’ve help me see how I can love and be kind, and just be a better person. And that’s all I wanted.” He felt Jiyong squeeze his hand, letting him know that he understood.

“But what I needed to do was figure out how to be that person one my own. You started me on the right path, but I knew deep down that if I wanted to change for good I would have figure things out by myself. When we talked that night I was trying to tell you this, but you wouldn’t let me explain. And then a few days later I tried to call you but you wouldn’t answer your phone. So then I went over to you studio and I saw someone putting up a sign saying that you were away on business for an unknown amount of time… And all I could think of was back when we were kids. You had left with no word. Just like that and then you did it again. I didn’t know what to do…

After a few days Daesung said that we had some jobs we could do in Japan. I was so taken aback that someone still wanted to work with me after everything, but I knew that I had to take it. So we came he and over time I was starting to put myself together. People had heard about the scandal, but they didn’t really care that much. As far as they knew, I was a famous actor and I was willing to model and make them money. This is how I was able get past everything, and become confident with who I am. And that all I’ve wanted was to be confident and okay with who I was, because it would be only then that I would be able to stand next to you and see you look at me with love and affection and be someone who was worthy of standing by your side.”

When Seunghyun looked up after he had finished, he saw that it was Jiyong was the one who was crying now. He quickly pulled the man into his arms, but that only seemed to make him cry more.

Jiyong buried his head in Seunghyun’s neck and in between sobs he kept repeating “You stupid man… you stupid, stupid man…”

It took a couple minutes for Jiyong to calm down, but when he did Seunghyun pulled him away and said, “You’ve always shone brighter than anyone I’ve known.” He wiped a tear from Jiyong’s cheek. “You just have that kind of personality that draws people to you. But I couldn’t let my darkness corrupt you. Because if it had… then I wouldn’t have been able to find my way out.”

Seunghyun brought his thumb up and pressed Jiyong’s bottom lip as he spoke, “Your smile… your laugh…your bright shining eyes. All this time you have been the light, the glimmer of hope, that was there in the back of my mind, telling me I could make it through. Because nothing would be worse for me if I didn’t have you in my life. A life without you is one that I could never live.”

Another tear escape Seunghyun’s eye and it was Jiyong’s turn to wipe it away. They looked into each other’s watery eyes as Jiyong said, “These past months have been hell…”

Seunghyun chuckled at the comment and wiped his runny nose, as the tension broke.

“But I realized too…” Jiyong continued. “A life without _you_ is one that _I_ could never live.”

Seunghyun couldn’t wait any longer, they had been apart for three months and the man that he loved was in his arms, millimeters away from him. So he closed the distance between them and pressed his lips against Jiyong’s.

It was almost like they had never been apart, their bodies reacting to each other automatically, as lips slid against each other and hands clutched one another. Once they had both recommitted the feeling of each others lips to memory again, Seunghyun pulled away.

“So does this mean that we’re bac-“

Jiyong shut him up with another kiss, this time his tongue playing with the seam of the older man’s mouth. Seunghyun opened willingly and savored the taste of Jiyong once again. He let out a small whine when he felt Jiyong pull away.

“Do you really have to ask?” The younger man questioned, raising an eyebrow.

Seunghyun laughed. “Not really… but I just wanted to make sure before I do something…”

“And wha-“

It was Seunghyun’s turn to shut him up as he peppered kisses all over the Jiyong’s face, saying “I love you” in between each one. Jiyong had a sudden flashback to when they were both in Jeju and he had done the same thing.

He remembered all that they had said that day and it was only now that he realized that Seunghyun had kept his word.

 

_“And know, that no matter what happens in the future, remember that I will always love you.”_


	31. Chapter 31

Seungri and Daesung opened the door to the studio with the rest of the staff following behind them. When Seungri heard a very familiar laugh coming from the main set, he looked to Daesung just to make sure that he had heard the same thing. Daesung, who looked to Seungri with confusion written all over his face, lead the way and found a sight that he wasn’t expecting.

Sitting on the couch that had been set up as a prop, were Jiyong and Seunghyun. Jiyong was leaning his back against the armrest of the couch with his legs resting in Seunghyun’s lap while they were talking and laughing at some unknown story.

“Nope, I don’t believe it.” Jiyong commented to what Seunghyun had told him, barely able to get the words out because he was giggling so much.

“I swear!” Seunghyun insisted “And then I had to explain in even more broken Japanese and hand motions and by the time I was done, the old woman probably thought I had some weird fetish with the sushi roll that I holding.”

At that, Jiyong lost it, throwing his head back, erupting in laughter and collapsed on the arm of the couch while Seunghyun mindlessly rested his hands on the younger man’s legs and played with the fabric of his pants.

It wasn’t until Daesung loudly cleared his throat that Jiyong stopped and looked to see that they had gained an audience. While Jiyong’s breathing returned to normal some of the staff started whispering and pointing at the very relaxed position that the photographer and the model were in. Not wanting to create another rumor, Seungri got Jiyong’s attention and pointed at his legs, motioning for him to take them off of Seunghyun.

Jiyong waved him off, but got up off the couch and said that they had finished the shoot 10 minutes ago and decided to talk until everyone returned. The glance that passed between Seungri and Daesung did not go unnoticed by Jiyong and Seunghyun.

“Right,” Daesung said skeptically. “Talked..? Are you sure you got all the shots that the magazine wanted?

All Jiyong had to do was cross his arms while he raised an eyebrow and Daesung threw up his hands in defense. “Alright, alright, you’re the photographer… so we’re done then.”

“Yeah Dae we’re done,” Seunghyun said as he got up off the couch to stand behind Jiyong. He placed his hands on the younger man’s shoulders and leaned towards his manager. “And we’re starving so let’s go out and get some dinner.”

Daesung looked to Seungri who just shrugged his shoulders, not really understanding what was going on between the two either. But the mention of food was enough to forgo the weirdness and Seungri jumped into action packing up the rest of their stuff and putting it back in the car.

 

 

Not wanting to leave hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of camera equipments in the car, Seungri suggested that they go to the hotel they were staying at and eat in the restaurant there, that way he could keep everything secured in his room. All of them agreed and Seunghyun and Daesung followed them in their car towards the hotel.

Once they were in the safety of their own car, Seungri jumped on Jiyong the first chance that he got and started asking questions. “So what happened in there? You guys act as though nothing happened the past three months and its only been a couple hours…?”

Jiyong sighed, not really in the mood to relive all the emotions that swept through him a while ago. “We talked and he explained his side of the story and everything he went through.” Seungri nodded. “I understand now,” Jiyong said.

“And I take it you guys are back together?”

Jiyong hesitated for a minute before he answered. “Yes. But we still have things to talk about and sort out. Three months is a long time and we both changed but it wasn’t long enough to change how we feel about each other.”

“So then are you still pissed at me for not telling you about this?” Seungri asked as a playful smile spread across his face.

Jiyong cut his eyes to the side and glared at his assistant who shrunk down under the intense glare.

“Ok okay, but… are you happy Jiyong?” the young man asked.

The corners of Jiyong’s mouth turned up, showing a content smile. “Yeah I’m happy…”

Seungri let out a relieved sigh, “Good. As long as you’re happy I can take you being pissed at me.”

The two broke out in laughter and Jiyong knew that he would forever be indebted to his friend for making this all happen.

 

At dinner, the four men sat around talking, drinking and having a good time. Daesung and Seungri had a competition between them on who could tell the most embarrassing story about trying to pick up girls and it left their entire table in tears from laughing. It was a comforting time, Seunghyun thought, spending dinner with friends and finally having the man that he loved by his side again. Jiyong kept stealing glances while he sat beside him and after a while Seunghyun took it upon himself to take the younger man’s hand in his, relishing in the soft warmth.

“God would you two just get a room already!” A very drunk Seungri yelled at the two, pulling them out of their own little world. “I swear back together for 5 minutes and already making googly eyes at each other.”

“Are not!” Jiyong shot back as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat and took another sip of his wine, even though he had already drank half the bottle.

Seunghyun who had suddenly realized how much he missed flustered Jiyong, reached underneath the table and placed his hand on the younger man’s thigh, and squeezed. Jiyong jumped as a flush crept its way up his cheeks. He looked down to see that some of his wine had spilled on his shirt and he let out a small groan. “Seunghyun, look what you made me do.”

The older man leaned over, whispering “Sorry” as he got closer to Jiyong’s ear and said, “Well now you really should go up to your room…”

Jiyong turned as red as his wine at Seunghyun’s words. All Seungri and Daesung could do was roll their eyes at the scene that played out in front of them. Not wanting to witness any more of the love birds, they looked to each other and seemed to have mutually agreed on something without exchanging any words. Turning towards them, Daesung announced that they were going to go find a club, and leave Seunghyun and Jiyong alone.

After paying for their meal, Seunghyun pulled Jiyong towards the elevators asking which floor he was staying on. Once inside the small metal container, Jiyong mumbled 906 and Seunghyun pressed the appropriate button.

On the ride up, the younger man rested his head on Seunghyun’s shoulder and absentmindedly played with their joined hands. The older man could tell that something was on his boyfriends mind but decided that it could wait until they were in his room. Seunghyun pulled the quiet man out onto his floor once they arrived and because he was a little intoxicated, Jiyong stumbled and held onto Seunghyun for support. He quickly righted himself and made his way to his room,pulling out his key card.

Jiyong walked over to his open suitcase and pulled out an old shirt to change into. He tugged the wine stained on off and as it dropped on the floor he felt Seunghyun’s arms wrap around him from behind. Jiyong shuddered at the touch and sucked in a breath when he felt the older man’s lips press against the back of his neck. Instinctively he moved his head to the side to give him more access, but once he felt the slickness of Seunghyun tongue along his skin did he turn around and place his hand between them.

“Seunghyun, as much as I’m happy that you’re with me right now… I don’t want to rush right back in this.” He looked up and met the older man’s hurt eyes. “I’m not saying that I want you to go, on the contrary, I uhh… would you just stay with me?” His head was fuzzy from alcohol but his heart and body knew that he needed Seunghyun by his side. Leaning forward he nestled himself in Seunghyun’s open chest and wrapped his arms around the older man.

Seunghyun wrapped his arms on the small of Jiyong’s bare back and rested his chin on top of his head.

“We just have a lot more to talk about, especially me, because I want to apologize for being an ass… and jumping to conclusions… and then being more of an ass-“

Seunghyun pulled Jiyong’s head away from his chest and looked down at him. “Jiyong…”

“What?”

“You’re rambling…” Seunghyun smiled and placed a gentle kiss on his boyfriend's lips, silencing him from any further nonsense that he was about to say.

Jiyong felt a sense of calm wash over him in that moment. No matter how much pain they both had gone through, they knew that they would always be by each other sides from now on. They experienced what it felt like to be separated from one another, to have half of yourself missing for months on end. And now that they were reunited, they knew not to ever doubt each other again.

After a few more minutes of holding one another, Jiyong pulled back and yawned, his tiredness starting to take over. He was about to put the shirt that he pulled out on but Seunghyun stopped him.

“What?”

“Just trust me…”

The older man proceeded to strip down to his boxers and then started undoing Jiyong’s pants leaving him in his boxers as well. Once he had pulled them off, he pulled Jiyong over to the bed, pushed aside the comforter and made him get in bed. Seunghyun moved around to the other side and slid in, pulling Jiyong into his arms once again. His body almost melted into the mattress as he felt Jiyong against his own flesh once again. He had spent countless nights dreaming of this feeling and now it was almost too good to be true… almost. With the younger man’s back pressed to his stomach, Seunghyun leaned his mouth down to Jiyong’s neck again and kissed his nape, taking in the younger man's scent.

“God I’ve miss you.”

The whispered confession tickled the hair on Jiyong’s neck and he giggled. “I missed you more than you’ll ever know.”

Seunghyun squeezed him closer. “Promise to tell me someday…”

Jiyong shook his head. “What would be the point? I don’t plan on ever feeling like that again as long as you stay right here… with me.”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

 

The next morning found them still wrapped in each other’s arms, however Jiyong was practically laying on top of Seunghyun. When he started stirring awake, he tried his hardest to not wake the man beneath him. Wiggling a bit, he struggled to get out of Seunghyun’s arms. However his plan was foiled when said man held him tighter and spoke in his sleep filled voice.

“Jiyong, if you seriously don’t want me to flip you over right now and have my way with you, you better stop. I’m trying really hard right now…”

Jiyong stilled and looked up to Seunghyun. He had messy hair and sleepy eyes, but it wasn’t enough to hide the arousal that was written in them. Jiyong quickly thought about his options and just decided to throw everything out the window. He loved Seunghyun. He always would. And he had him in his bed right here, right now.

“Oh fuck it.” He said as he moved and crashed their lips together and moved to straddle Seunghyun.

Right away the older man grabbed on Jiyong’s hips and moaned at the pressure he created on his groin. He felt an eagerness in every move Jiyong made, like every kiss and taste wasn’t enough to satisfy him. He needed every part of the older man, and he needed it now.

Jiyong’s tongue broke through Seunghyun’s lips and he released a whimper at the taste. He rolled his hips and Seunghyun gasped. The older man pulled back for a second, “Jiyong, whoa wait…” Again a small whine was heard from the younger man who had moved on to kissing his way along Seunghyun’s jaw. “I thought… hmmm… you said you wanted…” Jiyong licked the crook of his neck. “Oh god…” Seunghyun fought to think straight. “I-I thought you wanted to wait…”

Jiyong pulled back, and as he did so he moved his hips again, making sure he got his point across. “I’ve waited long enough, I love you and I want to show you how much I love you… right now.”

There was really no way Seunghyun could deny Jiyong, especially since he was just dreaming about this moments ago and he was becoming harder with every twist the younger man made on top of him, so he just let himself be ravished.

The makeup sex with Jiyong was the most sensual experience Seunghyun had ever had. The way the young man moved and the places he touched had him mewling and coming undone. He let Jiyong explore him and take full control, like Jiyong said, he wanted to _show_ Seunghyun his love, and there was no doubt in his mind just how much his boyfriends did. Their bodies worked together to touch a deeper part of their souls, this moment speaking for both of them in many more ways than words ever could and when they finally reach their peak of ecstasy, they collapsed in each other’s arms knowing that from this moment on, their lives would forever be changed.

 

Laying in each other’s arms, while they came down from their high, both sat in silence taking everything in. From the moment when they first met, to when they realized that they were childhood friends. Jiyong remembered the night Seunghyun confessed how he felt and their first couple dates.

Seunghyun remembered the night he brought Jiyong over to his place for the first time, sharing a carton of ice cream. He remembered the night Jiyong got back from New York and when they shared their first sexual experience together. He remembered what it felt like to wake up to the sight of Jiyong running around his kitchen wearing one of his shirts and how he agreed to “move in” for a couple nights every now and then.

As he thought about that time more and more, and every other moment that led up to where they were now, he wanted to ask Jiyong something. Playing with the younger man’s hair while he rested on his chest, Seunghyun whispered into the dark hotel room.

“Jiyong? Will you move back to Korea with me?”

The younger man took his time and Seunghyun was about to tell him to forget he even asked when all of a sudden Jiyong mumbled into his chest.

“I can’t.”

Jiyong could feel Seunghyun stiffen beneath him when he gave his answer and he felt like he couldn’t get his explanation out fast enough.

“God, no! That’s not what I meant!” he started as he moved up and onto Seunghyun more, resting his chin on his sternum. “I mean I can’t right now because I have to go to a wedding in like two weeks over in America. Do you remember Taeyang, my friend from New York?”

“I thought he wasn’t getting married till August?”

“Well they thought so too until they discovered that the bride to be, is to be expecting.”

“Oh…”

“Yeah so they moved up the wedding, hoping that Lydia wouldn’t be showing too much in June.” Seunghyun slowly nodded. “But now that I think about it… would you like to be my plus one?”

Seunghyun looked at the bright shining eyes of his boyfriend as he waited for him to give his reply, but he didn’t want to cave in just yet. “Answer my question first…”

Leaning forward, Jiyong pressed his lips to Seunghyun’s and said, “I would love to go back with you.”

“Then I would love to be your plus one.” Seunghyun replied back.

 

In the days leading up to the wedding many things happened. The biggest was Seunghyun agreeing to spend those 2 weeks with Jiyong in America, using it as an excuse to get used to living together before moving back to Korea. Jiyong was not one to argue with him.

Jiyong still had a couple jobs to do, but in between, him and Seunghyun talked and had come to terms with everything that had happened and wanted to start a fresh.

Jiyong’s mom had heard that her son’s boyfriend was in town and insisted Jiyong bring him over for dinner. Surprisingly Seunghyun didn’t even have to introduce himself when he walked in because Jiyong’s mother recognized him.

“Seunghyun? Is that really you? I haven’t seen you since you were a chubby little boy following Jiyong around when you were 12.”

“Well not much has really changed… I still follow Jiyong everywhere.”

Everyone burst out laughing and by the end of the night Jiyong’s mother pulled him off to the side and expressed how grateful she was to him for making her little boy smile, then and now.

 

One thing that he defiantly got used to over in America was the fact that him and Jiyong could walk down the street hand in hand and no one would look at them weirdly or start whispering behind their backs. They could freely show their love for one another and Seunghyun took advantage of every second of it, complete with random stops so he could kiss the younger man right in the middle of the street.

 

For the wedding, they flew out to New York, and on the day of Seunghyun found himself sitting amongst the crowd while Jiyong stood alongside his best friend playing the part of best man. Seeing Jiyong in a tux and watching the happy couple exchange vows gave Seunghyun the day dream of the day when him and Jiyong could do the same.

He had decided a long time ago that he did want to marry Jiyong down the road, and being here made him want to tell the priest to hold up as he claimed Jiyong for himself for all eternity. But he knew that it would happen eventually, on its own time, and if he put his mind to it he would be able to wait.

After the ceremony, people made their way out of the church making their way to where the reception was going to be held, but everyone knew that it would be at least another hour before it started, so the bride and groom could take pictures. Jiyong for once was on the other side of the camera as he posed with Taeyang and the other group of guys that made up his groomsmen.

When he and the rest were excused from pictures, Jiyong went on the hunt to find his missing boyfriend. Low and behold he found the man wandering around the sanctuary of the church, looking at all the stained glass.

“Ehh hum,” Jiyong cleared his throat trying to get the older man’s attention.

Seunghyun jumped slightly but turned around and faced Jiyong with a smile. “The wedding was beautiful, but personally I think you were the best looking up there.” Jiyong laughed and lightly swatted at Seunghyun. The older man grabbed a hold of Jiyong’s extended arm and his fingers came in contact with metal. He looked down and saw Jiyong wearing the watch he had given him so many months ago.

Seunghyun learned the night in Jiyong’s hotel room in Japan that he had worn it every day since Jeju except that day of the photo shoot, saying that he had forgotten it in the rush trying to make it in time.

As his fingers swiped the face of the watch he heard Jiyong say, “You know, at least for me… I have thought about you every second of every day from the minute you walked into my life.”

A small smile spread across Seunghyun lips as he remembered what he had engraved on the back of the watch, _A reminder that for every second, I think of you_. Seunghyun brought up his hand and cupped Jiyong’s cheek as he said, “And for every second, I have, and will always love you.” Seunghyun moved down onto one knee, still holding Jiyong’s hand in his.

“You are not proposing to me right now, are you? Cause if you are-“

“No I’m not proposing… yet. I just want to ask if you would at least promise me something. Promise that you will love me and stay by my side no matter what happens. Promise that we will build a life together… and promise me that one day… when I do propose… you’ll say yes.”

Seunghyun felt a tear fall on his hand and he looked up to see Jiyong trying his hardest not to cry. The younger man didn’t trust his voice so all he could offer for his answer was a nod of his head as Seunghyun pulled him into his arms.

After wiping their tears away, Seunghyun decided that they should start heading over to the reception. Jiyong agreed and the rest of the night was filled with great times spent with friends.

Jiyong introduced Seunghyun to several people in the industry in America who attended Taeyang's big day, as well as some celebrities including a few actors and directors. One of which seemed very interested in Seunghyun and his look and when he found out that he was an actor himself, he only had one question for him.

“Would you be interested in going to Hollywood for some auditions, I know quite a few people who are looking for your type out there and I can promise, you’d be a hit.”

Seunghyun looked to Jiyong who was wrapped around his arm, silently asking if this was real, that he was getting an offer to act in LA, in Hollywood movies.

Jiyong just stood by his side and looked up to him with proud eyes and that was all it took for Seunghyun to turn back to the director and ask, “When’s the next flight to LA?”


	32. Epilogue

_3 years later…_

 

“Does my hair really look okay?”

“Yes, Seunghyun for the thousandth time, you look fine.”

Jiyong rolled his eyes as Seunghyun looked into the small hand mirror that he had brought with him for the car ride over.

“What about my tie? Is it centered?” Seunghyun stretched out for his boyfriend to look. Jiyong straightened the purple silk that hung around his neck and then smoothed down his lapels to finish off the adjustment.

“Hyun, if you don’t settle down right now…”

“I know I know, it’s just… well…”

“I get that you’re nervous but I’m here. I’ll be standing beside you all the way.”

Seunghyun took a deep breath as the words his boyfriend spoke calmed him down but after a few more minutes of silence in the car, Seunghyun started fidgeting again. Jiyong took the older man’s hand in his and played with the silver band on his ring finger.

“Do you think there will be a big crowd? Like in New York and London?”

“I sure there will be hundreds more, I mean come on who would want to miss Vick’s great return to the Korean silver screen.”

Seunghyun nodded as he buzzed with energy. After a few more minutes both men felt the car come to a stop and heard the huge crowd that waited on the other side of the door.

Jiyong saw the older man pale slightly and just before their car door was opened, he leaned over and gave Seunghyun a kiss for good luck.

 

The dozens of flashbulbs of the paparazzi blinded them as they stepped out of the car together. People yelled at them to look to their left and right, but before they could get whiplash one of the ushers moved them down to start their walk on the red carpet. They heard fans screaming from the crowd as they made their way down, stopping to talk to reporters every so often.

One caught Seunghyun’s attention and he pulled Jiyong along to talk as well.

“Good evening Vick, what a great night for a movie premiere, right?”

Seunghyun nodded into the camera. “Yeah I thought it was going to rain earlier but it looks like it held out just for us.”

“Speaking of “us” would you introduce your date tonight to all the viewers at home.”

Seunghyun chuckled, playing the part of the suave movie actor even though Jiyong knew this was what he was completely nervous about.

“This,” he looked to Jiyong and held up their joined hands “is my loving boyfriend Kwon Jiyong.”

The reporter gave a smile and raised an eyebrow. “And how long have you been going out?”

“A little over three years now.”

Just then a girl from the crowd yelled out “Marry me Vick!” and Jiyong took the opportunity to raise Seunghyun’s hand, showing off the silver couple’s ring that he was playing with earlier as he yelled back, “Sorry he’s taken!”

The reported jumped on the sudden showing of the ring and quickly asked, “Did you two get married while he was filming in America?”

Seunghyun shook his head. “No we didn’t tie the knot. We just wanted to wear these as a promise that someday soon we will.”

“Ahh, well you to make a great looking couple and I can’t wait to see the movie Vick.” The reporter finished the small interview and they moved on to the next.

 

The next night found Jiyong and Seunghyun sitting in their living room eating take out as they watched themselves walk the red carpet from the movie premiere.

“Wow, I really did look good.” Seunghyun remarked on himself.

“Told ya so, but you didn’t believe me.” Jiyong said as he bumped his shoulder against Seunghyun’s.

The older man leaned over and kissed his boyfriend on the cheek. “You’d think after three years I would learn to listen to you.”

“I can only dream of it.”

They continued their silly banter back and forth as they finished eating, letting the news coverage of the premiere become noise in the background.

 

_“And that was Vick, the supporting actor in the latest Hollywood blockbuster. He created quite the stir when his sudden coming out, sparking a huge scandal a few years ago, but now him and the rest of the world seem to have put it behind him and he’s back to show his true acting ability in his latest film, and Korea couldn’t be prouder of him...”_


	33. Bonus: The Forgotten Dream

As soon as he walked into his hotel room he started stripping off his cloths and made his way into the bathroom to take a long relaxing hot shower. It had been a long day of filming and Seunghyun was finally happy to be back in his room. He had done some more stunt work today and his body was battered from the rigorous work out.

He turned the water on and waited until steam filled the room to climb into the shower. He stood under the showerhead and let the water rain down upon him,relaxing every muscle in his body, but after a good ten minutes he decided to actually wash himself and get to bed because he had more filming tomorrow.

When he was done, he wrapped a towel around his waist and made his way out toward the bed. He grabbed his phone and made sure to set his alarm for the morning. He laid down on the bed and waited for sleep to take him, but just as he was almost asleep, his phone beeped.

He reached over to see who it was from and as soon as he did he became more alert.

Jiyong: Just wanted to say goodnight. Hope the movie is going well. Can’t wait to see you again.

A smile spread across his face as he read the message. It had been a couple weeks since he had seen his boyfriend because of filming and they could only talk through little messages and short phone calls. He looked at the time and thought it best to not respond for he didn’t want to wake him up, so he set his phone down and let his mind wander with thoughts of Jiyong.

 

_Seunghyun looked around the studio and saw long red pieces of fabric draped all around the room. There was a small table in the middle of the room with a lit candelabra, a bottle of wine and two wine glasses ready to be filled. He looked to the right and saw a large red velvet renaissance-looking couch, with smaller candles glittering the floor around it._

_He heard a noise behind him and turned to find Jiyong walking towards him with his camera in hand._

_“So I see you’re in costume…” Jiyong looked Seunghyun up and down with eager eyes. “Mr. Casanova.”_

_Vick glanced down to see what his costume was and saw he was wearing skin tight brown pants that laced up in the front and a billowing white shirt that was rather low cut. He pulled the fabric out just to make sure that he was indeed wear this outfit and that he probably look ridiculous wearing it. He then looked to Jiyong hoping he would give an explanation._

_“What? You don’t like it? Too bad you’re just going to have to put up with it because it’s what the magazine wants. “The sexy seductive side of Vick” as one of the editors told me. So today’s concept is Casanova, which is you, and you are to act as though you are seducing the readers of the magazine.”_

_“So basically I have to seduce the camera?”_

_“Yes.”_

_Seunghyun gave Jiyong a sly smile and stepped toward him. He reached up his hand and traced Jiyong’s fingers that held the camera. Then he looked Jiyong in the eyes, raising an eyebrow as he whispered, “This is going to be fun.”_

_Jiyong slapped away the older man’s hand and said “Nope, no touching. We are here to do a photo shoot and that’s all. Now go over and sit on the couch.”_

_Seunghyun leaned in closer and with his deep voice he said, “I love it when you tell me what to do.”_

_Jiyong huffed and pushed the older man towards the couch, “Go. Sit. Do something. So we can get started.”_

_“Oh there are plenty of things I want to do.”_

_Seunghyun could almost hear Jiyong’s eyes rolling as he made his way toward the couch._

_As he passed the table that held the wine and glasses, he grabbed them and then proceeded to sit down. He poured both glasses full of wine and set the bottle back on the table. Taking a glass for himself, he swished the liquid around and then took a nice long sip, letting the rich taste seep into his taste buds. He looked to his boyfriend and with a knowing smirk asked, “So… what position do you prefer me in?”_

_~_

_With Seunghyun laying across the couch and the wine starting to show itself by the redness in his cheeks, Jiyong was getting very sexually frustrated. He knew that they had a job to do, but when you put your boyfriend in front of you, looking like a sex god, how could he not be frustrated?_

_Jiyong moved closer to Seunghyun trying different angles, but nothing was coming out the way he wanted it. He knew what he wanted but honestly he didn’t think it would be possible for him to achieve it. Well… he could but that would be crossing the line of professionalism, in his opinion. So he shook the thoughts out of his head and tried to continue with whatever method he could think of._

_Which didn’t last long…_

_Finally Jiyong stood up from his crouched position saying, “Damn it! Whatever I’m just gonna do it.”_

_Seunghyun looked at him questioningly, wondering what was going through his boyfriends mind, but it wasn’t long until he found out._

_“Look, as you can tell I’m just not getting the angle that I want, but I know how I can get it._ However, _I need you to behave. I know we are alone here but this is still a photo shoot for which we are both getting paid for. So just stay still and don’t move, understand?”_

_All Seunghyun could do was watch as his boyfriend came over to the couch and kneeled on the piece of furniture, in between his legs. Jiyong took a couple shots but still was not getting happy with them so he scooted closer to Seunghyun._

 

_Jiyong looked at Seunghyun and gave him a warning with his eyes as he placed his hand on his stomach to steady himself as he straddled his boyfriend’s hips. Seunghyun’s eyes bugged out at the sudden position change, and as much as he joked around so far, he knew he had to keep his thoughts to himself, at least until Jiyong got off him._

_Seeing Seunghyun’s reaction and look of discomfort, Jiyong tried to reassure him, “I know, I shouldn’t really be doing this but I just need to be at this angle.”_

_“Just hurry up will you. I honestly don’t know how long I’ll be able to keep my hands to myself. And how do you know this is the angle you need.” He said in a slightly pissed off voice._

_Jiyong lowered the camera away from his face and his cheeks turned red as he stuttered, “Well… I-I umm… w-whenever we’re in this position… during… you know… I’m always looking down at you… and your face always looks good from this angle…”_

_He brought the camera back up quickly to hide his face and started taking pictures._

_Seunghyun groaned, “Ji, why did you have to say that? Now I have no choice but to have that image running through my head, while you’re on top of me no less, and I can’t do anything to you!”_

_“I know, I’m sorry just give me a few minutes and I’ll get off.”_

_Seunghyun could tell by his voice that Jiyong was really trying to keep this as professional as possible. But with the memories of their most intimate times now replaying over and over in his head, he knew that if Jiyong didn’t hurry, this shoot was going to end very fast._

_The hardest part about this new position was that every little movement and squirm Jiyong made to take his pictures, Seunghyun felt it right in his groin. Jiyong would give him small directions to tilt his head to the left or raise his chin up or move his arm to the side but everything just reminded him of them having sex._

 

_Jiyong leaned over and brushed Seunghyun billowing shirt color to the side to expose more of his skin. Seunghyun felt the warmth of his boyfriends fingertips and wished that this torture would be over soon. Every now and then Jiyong would yell at him to try and relax, act natural, pretend like its them in their own bedroom, but it just made Seunghyun even more frustrated._

_The younger man pulled back to snap so more photo’s and as he did so he grinded his crotch against the hardness that had formed in Seunghyun’s pants. He heard the older man moan and looked at him through the camera lens, taking in his flushed cheeks and lust filled eyes._

_Finally Seunghyun couldn’t take it anymore and he reached up and grabbed the camera out of Jiyong’s hands and gently set it on the floor only to bring his now free hand back up and pull his boyfriend down into a heated kiss. He wasted no time as he slide his tongue across his lips, and shoved it into his mouth to taste him._

_Jiyong ran his fingers through Seunghyun’s hair and when the older man jerked his hips up into him, he tugged tighter, soliciting another moan._

_Rubbing his hands up and down Jiyong’s waist, Seunghyun pulled at the younger man’s shirt trying to take it off of him. With a quick pause, they separated and Jiyong leaned back to remove the garment that his boyfriend so adamantly wanted off of him._

_As he looked down at Seunghyun, a smile spreading across his face as he playfully said, “We really shouldn’t be doing this.”_

_“But that’s what makes it even hotter.” Seunghyun said as he raised an eyebrow, giving a silent challenge to see if Jiyong would stop him. He ran his hand up Jiyong’s thigh, across his hips and stopped just above his pants and started slowly rubbing his hands along his hip bones, just so he could feel the soft warmth of his boyfriends skin that he had been denied for too long these past couple of hours._

_“Well I guess it’s a good thing that I was finished taking pictures anyway,” Jiyong said, brushing his fingertips along Seunghyun’s eyebrows._

_“Well thank fuck.” the older man sighed. “Another minute of you squirming on top of me and I would have you yelling at me for different reasons than you were earlier.”_

_“But what if,” Jiyong leaned forward, their chests coming in contact, “I want you to yell?” His fingers moved down Seunghyun’s face, stopping at his lips. “You’re not the only one who’s frustrated you know. Can’t you tell?”_

_Jiyong moved his hips, making them shift to an angle were Seunghyun could better feel just how frustrated he was too._

_“Shit… Ji…”_

_Jiyong lowered his face towards Seunghyun, the older man waited for the taste of his boyfriend to press against his lips but he was disappointed for a minute as Jiyong’s warm breath ghosted over his neck and up to his ear._

_“I love it when I make you curse… for all the right reasons.” The younger man rolled his hips again, grinding their clothed erections together._

_"Keep it up and I'll be cursing worse than sailor."_

_"Mmm," Jiyong hummed against Seunghyun's collar bone, tasting his skin that was quickly becoming salty from their intensifying body heat. "That's a nice image; you in a sailor's uniform. Maybe we can make that our own private photo shoot, what do you think?”_

_"Fuu-haahhh," Seunghyun could only moan as Jiyong started nibbling on his skin._

_"I'll take that as a yes," the younger man said, rolling his hips again._

_"Fuck Ji, no more teasing please," Seunghyun begged._

_Wordlessly Jiyong smiled against Seunghyun's skin as his hand started roaming further down his body until he came to the top of his pants. His fingers moved underneath his shirt, skitting across the small trail of hair that disappeared past the brown fabric of his pants. He heard Seunghyun's breath catch in his throat and the fleeting touches that he knows drives him wild. Jiyong quickly glanced up to see his boyfriend watching his every move, eyes heavy and cheeks red with lust._

_Jiyong leaned down and captured Seunghyun's mouth with his, sliding his tongue over his lips as his hand covered the older man's clothed erection, giving it some much need attention. Seunghyun bucked his hips into Jiyong's hand wanting more friction. The younger man felt the vibrations of the moans Seunghyun was releasing against their lips and it fueled him more to move things along._

_He moved his hand up to the top of the older man's pants again and fingered the knot that tied the fabric together, keeping it secure on Seunghyun. Finally pulling the string lose, he shoved his hand down and grasped the warm hard flesh that was waiting to be touched._

_"Fuck! Holy... shit!"_

_Jiyong smirked at Seunghyun's reaction. "Hmmm, scream just like that baby. I want to hear just how good I make you feel." he moved his wrist slightly, making the older man say unintelligible pleas._

_Jiyong moved his hand up and down Seunghyun's cock, slowly at first but then started picking up the pace as his boyfriend was beginning to thrust into his hand, throwing curses here and there._

_Just when the tightness in his lower belly was becoming too unbearable, Seunghyun felt Jiyong's hand release him._

_"W-what the hell?"_

_Jiyong leaned down and kissed him again, this time short, but not lacking passion as he felt his tongue lick the roof of his mouth._

_As he pulled back slightly, Jiyong said, "I didn't want you to cum just yet. I want you to... do it inside me."_

_Seunghyun didn't have time to voice his opinion because the next thing he knew Jiyong was lifting himself up, off the couch and removing the remaining clothing. He watching in awe at the beauty of his boyfriend, skin flushed with passion and lust, lips swollen. His eyes devoured Jiyong's naked body and he couldn't wait to get his hands back on him, especially the hard cock that stood out, begging to be touched._

_Jiyong saw how Seunghyun was looking at him and slowly advanced back toward him and watched as the older man lifted his hands to grip his bare waist, rubbing circles with his thumbs against his slightly protruding hip bones._

_"God, Jiyong,” Seunghyun whispered, "do you realize how beautiful you are?"_

_Their eyes stayed locked with each other as their unspoken love was said through their gaze. Seunghyun scooted closer to the edge of the couch and lowered his head so he could press his lips along the pale skin that was the younger mans belly, trying to make him feel just how much he adored him._

_Jiyong's hands came up, gripping Seunghyun on the back of the neck, grazing the fine hairs at the bottom of his scalp as he relished the warmth of Seunghyun's lips and tongue against his skin._

_The older man's mouth started moving lower, leaving a wet trail down his stomach as he got closer to Jiyong's waiting erection. But before his mouth could claim it, Jiyong gripped his hair and forced him to look up._

_"Hyun... suck me." Jiyong whispered, his eyes were desperate and clouded over._

_It was Seunghyun's time to smirk. "Fuck... I love it when you’re horny, desperate... and demanding." He licked his lips and then followed instructions, darting his tongue out and tasting the salty precum that leaked from Jiyong's dick. "Mmm you taste so good baby."_

_The younger man whimpered at the confession but gripped Seunghyun's hair tighter and canted his hips up towards his boyfriend's lips more. "Just shut up and take me in."_

_Seunghyun obliged and took the tip of his cock into his mouth, sucking slightly. He loved it when Jiyong would start taking control, telling him what to do. It was such a big turn on and so unlike his normal personality. He only became this way whenever he was extremely desperate and Seunghyun was all too willing to listen._

_He bobbed his head slowly, taking Jiyong's cock further into his mouth, his tongue gliding along the underside. He felt the younger man's nails scratch his scalp as his hips canted up, wanting to go faster._

_"More Seunghyun... I need...more."_

_Listening, Seunghyun moved his left hand and grabbed the soft flesh that was Jiyong's ass, massaging it for a few seconds. He heard the groans of approval from the man above him and thought that he couldn’t wait to hear what he would do with what he had planned next._

_As fast as he could, Seunghyun brought his left hand to his mouth, releasing Jiyong's dick for a brief second, and took his index finger into his mouth, making it slick and then moved it back towards Jiyong's ass. Without any words, he took his boyfriends cock back into his mouth and at the same time found his entrance and gently pushed his finger into the tight warmth._

_"Oh god!" Jiyong screamed. "Shit Hyun... that feels...." the younger man couldn't even finish his sentence because of the overwhelming feelings that he was experiencing._

_Seunghyun moaned around his cock, relishing how he was making his boyfriend come undone._

_He curled his finger the same time he curled his tongue around Jiyong's tip and he could hear the man huffing from the intense pleasure. Picking up the pace with his mouth, Seunghyun decided to add another finger and Jiyong almost collapsed to his knees. He moved his fingers in and out while bobbing his head, the sounds he was creating bounced off the small walls of the studio, which turned him on even more._

_"Fu-fuck Seunghyun, slow down." Jiyong pleaded and pulled Seunghyun's head away from him. He watched as his boyfriend released his dick from this mouth with a small pop and look up at him. With lidded eyes and a sly grin Seunghyun said, "Tell me baby, what do you want me to do next."_

_Jiyong brought his thumb up and wiped some saliva off the corner of the older man's mouth. "Lean back," was all he said but the older man followed anyway. Jiyong, for the second time that night, placed both knees on either side of Seunghyun's waist, hovering over him, ready to watch every reaction._

_"Don't be quiet Seunghyun. I want to hear every sigh and moan come from your lips," he said bringing his own lips to press against his boyfriends as he gripped Seunghyun's cock and aligned it with himself. The older man hummed at the touch but then Jiyong lowered himself onto his dick and he whimpered at being slowly filled._

_"Oh god yes!" Seunghyun moaned as he felt Jiyong's warmth circle around him, pulling him in deeper. The younger man's grip on his hair loosened and he felt Jiyong's hands fall to his shoulders._

_"Shit Seunghyun, you feel so fucking good." Jiyong admitted and pushed himself up, only to drop back down onto his boyfriend._

_Seunghyun's nails dug themselves into Jiyong's hips as he steadied the younger man who was starting to move more and more. "Hmm fuck..." he moaned, trying to oblige Jiyong's request of not staying quiet. Soon he too started moving his hips, meeting Jiyong and going deeper inside of him._

_"Yes... just like that..." the younger man said. "H-harder..."_

_Obeying, Seunghyun bucked his hips with more force, making Jiyong gasp in pleasure. The younger man removed his hands from Seunghyun's shoulders and placed them on the top of the couch they were on, he used it as leverage as he rotated his hips, lifting himself almost completely off his boyfriend, only to come slamming down again._

_"Fuck... shit!" The older man screamed out, the sound creating a shiver that ran up Jiyong’s spine and he wanted to hear it again. So he repeated the action but this time he rolled his hips as soon as Seunghyun's cock was completely inside him again, creating a delicious friction between his untouched dick and the older man's stomach._

_"Damn this is fucking amazing," Seunghyun panted out. "Your tight hole just swallows me up and clenches around me."_

_Jiyong sighed. "T-touch me Hyun... for the love of-" Seunghyun bucked into him again. "Just fucking stroke my cock."_

_He did. And he rubbed his thumb over the tip as his hips canted up, creating a new rhythm for them. Jiyong's moan were becoming louder and he could feel his ass tightening up. He was close to his release._

_"Seunghyun... shit..." he panted as he lowered his head and kissed his boyfriend lazily on the mouth and then rested his head onto his shoulder. "I'm close..."_

_"Me too," the older man admitted._

_"Then make me cum." Jiyong softly demanded as his teeth grazed the spot at the base of Seunghyun's neck._

_The older man lost it then. He grabbed on Jiyong's hips with a new found passion and lifted the younger man up slightly only to pound back into him over and over again until all he could hear with the slick sounds that their bodies were making mixed with the sound of Jiyong screaming his name._

 

 

_BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP!_

 

Seunghyun was jerked awake to the sound of his alarm clock blaring in his ear. He was ever so tempted to throw his phone across the room for waking him up from one of the best dreams he has ever had. He rolled over to switch it off but as he did so he felt the raging hard on that he had from dream and he groaned in frustration. Quickly shutting off the alarm he rolled back over and closed his eyes as he tried to fall back into the dream while his hand found its way beneath his sleep pants.

 

_2 hours later_

 

“Seunghyun,” Daesung started as he was driving to them to the set, “are you okay? You don’t look too good.”

“Yeah I’m fine,” the older man mumbled in response.

“Did you not sleep well… a bad dream maybe?”

“Actually it was a lovely dream but my stupid alarm clock woke me up from it,” Seunghyun growled back.

“Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” Daesung said under his breath so the other man wouldn’t hear. “Oh yeah I almost forgot… I got a call from a magazine back in Korea asking if you would like to be their model for an anniversary issue.” Seunghyun rolled his eyes in annoyance. “The theme sounds pretty interesting… they want you to be Casanova.”

“You have got to be fucking kidding me!”


End file.
